Why I don't like Mississippi (Hattiesburg, McComb: private school, pros and cons, living in)

[covedweller]

Originally Posted by canuckmtl

In fact , at one point they stopped at a gas station and my son was told out loud, "there was no bathroom for *him*, when he asked for the keys. His friend, who was wearing a star-of-david necklace was told the same thing.

At a second gas station, he did get to use the bathroom, but it was so run down and dilapidated, words cannot describe it ( apparently), but a bunch of men at that place followed them in a pick up truck, on the highway for several miles.

1st thing, I've been to numerous gas stations around the country and have been told there were no public restrooms.

2nd thing, I got followed on my way to work today for a few miles by several men in a truck. About the time I was beginning to panic, they turned into a neighborhood and I could see they were a landscaping crew. Close calls like that are common in MS and are not exclusive to "forreners". However, we natives have conditioned ourselves mentally to deal with it.

[canuckmtl]

Originally Posted by covedweller

You were politely asked to provide the names of the towns......

One town was Laurel, MS

..and according to my son, there were bathrooms available at the Laurel stop - the keys were visible and there was no excuse for being denied access to the bathroom.

In any case he did write a letter to the Dept of Tourism expressing his experiences during his trip.

[rockies09]

I was upset before I posted yesterday. But when I read the posts that followed mine, I decided to spend more time on the website (when I should be doing 4 other pressing things on my schedule today!!) and read the post " I love Mississippi". Now I have to visit all those places mentioned in the thread by Brickpatio, Desert Kid, MrBeluksee and so many others. I understand what covedweller says :

"However, we natives have conditioned ourselves mentally to deal with it." I have never visited Mississippi yet, but was upset enough to post anyway! I am sorry! I usually defer judging people and places till I personally experience them.

I am visiting Mississippi in near future. We are thinking of moving there. My son who returned home from college yesterday late night showed me the “Purple map”, when I googled and Purple America wiki talks about political map, I guess he was trying to tell me figuratively there is no one bad place. He said people in America ARE happy. I thought he would be upset if I said we are considering a move to Mississippi. Instead with a bright smile on his face he showed me the map and said so called “backwardness/forwardness” is all over the place. What canuckmtl's
son and his friend experienced may happen anywhere. May be one should never make the whole state look bad. We should talk to friends in bigger cities or post in the threads if a certain route is safe before taking a road trip.I am glad his son notified the Tourism department. I hope he told them which specific gas stations they visited so they can talk to them.

I noticed there are a few that make grand negative statements about Mississippi. But I may never come across those scenarios in the life I lead. I will check tonight the website which I think Brickpatio mentioned- mississippibelieveit.com

Just to make everyone feel better- Mississippi scores better than Wyoming in National merit scholar ship selection scores as posted by Listener2307. I am considering moving to one of 2 Southern states for educational opportunities for my kids at college level. I visited early this month Alabama and was totally impressed at how kind people were. I also feel Missouri has nicest people. Unfortunately we do not like cold weather. I am off to Hattie in near future and I am afraid I may not have time to check out all the places in 2.5 days. But I wont be far if we choose Alabama.

[canuckmtl]

What canuckmtl's
son and his friend experienced may happen anywhere. May be one should never make the whole state look bad

Excuse me. The people at the gas station who did this are making the state look bad, not me. The boys were on an interstate highway, not on back roads and both have travelled to Europe and South America and certain have enough compos mentis to recognize intimidation when they experience it.

I am simply relating the experience that these two lad had whilst visiting - after all this particular section of this forum is concerning Mississippi, so I made the assumption that it was ok to share the experience.

Also, I can tell you you are wrong about; "This could happen anywhere". Maybe in your country, but not in mine. The government would have fined these people the very next day.

I feel confident that if my son & his co driver had to make this trip again, they would take the "long way" around, just to avoid having to go through there again, so like I said, in an especially poor state, it's money out of pockets, and actually today I spoke to some other people who had similar experiences there. I've invited them here to post their experiences and I hope they do.

I've certainly travelled myself in a lifetime to know the difference between issues in the US and issues outside of the US.
We just felt amazed that in 2011 in the USA, these things still prevailed. It's sad no matter how you want to look at it.

We do truly hope that the information sent to the Tourism Board will at least spark a dialogue with the owners of that gas station and I'm certainly anticipating at least an encouraging reply from them rather than some of the ridiculous diatribe that has been posted since my original message.

[rockies09]

canuckmtl, Yes, I said read about the "I love Mississippi" post and that I personally wanted to experience the place. I also said hopefully tourism dept. would talk to those 2 gas stations. Yes, misbehavior happens everywhere including my country. Even in a big city like Chicago I did not find all the folks to be very genial and friendly. Some were nice and some were rude. I spent hours doing voluntary work for school collecting money, depositing it in bank, preparing financials and getting audited etc., One of the rude women told me she would never be a treasurer. I tried quitting but the school staff would tell me it is nice of me to do the work.


I also said we should find out how safe it is drive outside the city limits. I do not want to be run over by wild people. I also do not want my son to be told that he cannot use bathroom when he needs to. That’s why most people I know do not venture into rural areas. While my 19 year old said good/bad exists everywhere, he also said maybe we should avoid rural areas. You clarified in your 3rd post that they were driving on a high way.

I was very upset initially, but I wanted to see for myself what the place is like. I have to say that in Wyoming my kids or the other minority kids similar to them seem quite happy. It seems it matters more if a kid was friendly and outgoing than the color of their skin. My younger son tells me that he shoots back equally sarcastic remarks when some kids say rude things behind his back. when I asked what they say he resists answering, saying there are always those ignorant kids along with normal kids.



I was a in hardware store in East Point, FL. Two older women and one younger one looked at me for a long time. My older son said they were weird when I mentioned it on the way back to our place. But the electrician, rental agency people, people at Subway and the maintenance man were quite nice.


When I mentioned about those critical of Mississippi it was others I came across in the threads. You were right in posting your sons experience. By talking about your son’s experience which most certainly was deplorable, you warned people like me to be watchful. I hope you can let us know what the high way was. We plan on driving to New Orleans and toMobile frequently if we move to Mississippi.


I really meant it when I said someone should talk to those people at the 2 gas stations so the whole state does not get a bad rap. If you visit Chicago and miss an exit and end up in certain parts of South Chicago, it looks very different from rest of the city. It feels like you are in a different country. Actually it looks like you are in the poorer sections of country where I came from 3 decades back. I wish we could change the way people think and live. I believe a change can be made if all adults like us get involved. We can follow up with tourism dept. If they want tourism dollars they should be as sweet as they can be to visitors and people of other races. Wherever we move we provide employment to at least 7/8 people directly and other businesses get benefited by us. We contribute ridiculous amount of money to IRS and work long hours providing services. I am not I willingly going there to get treated badly. I expect mostly good experiences and a little bad attitude. As I mentioned in the earlier post when I visited Alabama, I ran into these folks who were friendly. May be if I live there I may come across some who are rude.


I definitely would not put up with dangerous behavior. That’s why it would help if you let us know which highway your son and his friend drove by. May be I will drive on the same highway with a body guard and stop at every gas station!!

[mississippimagnolia]

Originally Posted by canuckmtl

Thank you for your replies although it's sad that some of these replies can only be articulated through sarcasm and moronic one liners that only further serve to validate my son's observations of oblique ignorance and a stunning lack of education. ( and in a supposedly first world country)

Because anyone who has ever spent any significant time in Mississippi knows that either you or your "black son" fabricated that entire story.

I am a vocal critic of many things about our great state. Go back and search my posts. I think Mississippi has very significant problems in education, health care, and poverty.

BUT... Mississippi has come a very long way in race relations. Do we still have issues? Of course! Every state does. But the story you posted is just beyond ridiculous. And I've been to Laurel many times. The town is at least half African American....maybe more. Your "black son" would not have been harassed at a gas station, nor followed by a pick-up truck. Perhaps there is a little more to the story. Does your son have the same ridiculously pompous attitude that you do? Did he walk into the gas station with the same overblown ego looking for trouble? Because if he did, I wouldn't doubt at all that he found exactly what he was seeking.

And in response to your comment regarding "stunning lack of education"....my husband and I are both college educated and beyond. We have both lived literally all over this country and spent several years living overseas.

You posted a completely fabricated story (again, made up either by your "black son" or you) and then got defensive when people called you on it.

I would suggest you keep your "black son" in your own country. It's obvious that he is not equipped to travel on his own.

[Rete648]

Originally Posted by canuckmtl

Excuse me. The people at the gas station who did this are making the state look bad, not me. The boys were on an interstate highway, not on back roads and both have travelled to Europe and South America and certain have enough compos mentis to recognize intimidation when they experience it.


Also, I can tell you you are wrong about; "This could happen anywhere". Maybe in your country, but not in mine. The government would have fined these people the very next day.

I'm sorry to disagree with you but this does happen in Canada regardless of the province. Quebec can be as prejudice and racist to white English Canadians as some Americans can be to African-Americans or Jews. Where or not the Canadian federal and/or provincal government fines them does not negate the fact that the response was such that it needed punishment.

I've meet with situations in Canadian, both in Montreal and in Ottawa, when visiting my husband and his family. He was born in Montreal and his family lives there. He served 36 yrs in the RCAF and retired to Ottawa before we married and he moved to the States.

In fact, he is moving to Hattiesburg in August of this year because he loves the people, the attitudes in general, the weather, and our daughter and her family lives there and loves it as well and we are born and raised metropolitan white middle-class New Yorkers.

I feel confident that if my son & his co driver had to make this trip again, they would take the "long way" around, just to avoid having to go through there again, so like I said, in an especially poor state, it's money out of pockets, and actually today I spoke to some other people who had similar experiences there. I've invited them here to post their experiences and I hope they do.

Healthwise it is foolish to use a gas station's restroom. Better to stop at a fast food place and use that one.

[covedweller]

Originally Posted by canuckmtl

Maybe in your country, but not in mine. The government would have fined these people the very next day.

You explained quite a bit with these two sentences.

[mississippimagnolia]

and actually today I spoke to some other people who had similar experiences there. I've invited them here to post their experiences and I hope they do.

Hmmmmm....I wonder if these "other people" will have similar IP addresses to your own? I'll bet all of these "other people" will be posting right from your living room.

[auntbee]

Originally Posted by mississippimagnolia

Because anyone who has ever spent any significant time in Mississippi knows that either you or your "black son" fabricated that entire story.

I am a vocal critic of many things about our great state. Go back and search my posts. I think Mississippi has very significant problems in education, health care, and poverty.

BUT... Mississippi has come a very long way in race relations. Do we still have issues? Of course! Every state does. But the story you posted is just beyond ridiculous. And I've been to Laurel many times. The town is at least half African American....maybe more. Your "black son" would not have been harassed at a gas station, nor followed by a pick-up truck. Perhaps there is a little more to the story. Does your son have the same ridiculously pompous attitude that you do? Did he walk into the gas station with the same overblown ego looking for trouble? Because if he did, I wouldn't doubt at all that he found exactly what he was seeking.

And in response to your comment regarding "stunning lack of education"....my husband and I are both college educated and beyond. We have both lived literally all over this country and spent several years living overseas.

You posted a completely fabricated story (again, made up either by your "black son" or you) and then got defensive when people called you on it.

I would suggest you keep your "black son" in your own country. It's obvious that he is not equipped to travel on his own.

Very good points. I couldn't help but think of my white teenaged grandson and his black best friend. They go everywhere together and never have any problems. I see mixed race couples all the time at ball games and nobody seems to even notice. We've come a long way and we don't need more ridiculous stories like this.