If moving to Jackson metro area, know this... (Ridgeland, Brandon: sale, house)

[bonefilmer]

My husband is considering a job which would require moving somewhere in the Jackson vicinity. However, I would like a nice little home with some serious acreage where I can have some small animals and a big vegetable garden. I am willing to negotiate some type of commute. I don't want to live in a subdivision. I'm kinda getting scared off by the negative comments, because I'm from Wisconsin, and I've heard we're not very friendly here and I AGREE! I call it "negative energy", and though I'm not into new-age, it's the only way to describe it. I've lived here all my life and yet have always felt this way. I consider myself a pretty friendly gal, but I may need to look harder in the mirror before moving to MS! We are down-to-earth, hard-working people who care less how much you or your neighbor have as long as you are people with a good heart. I don't need to win a popularity contest, but I would like to have a few friends. Are some of you telling me that there is NO chance unless I was born there? What are the hospitals like? Also, we have lots of water here, are there water shortages in the south?

[jsherman9901]

Originally Posted by bonefilmer

I don't need to win a popularity contest, but I would like to have a few friends. Are some of you telling me that there is NO chance unless I was born there? ..... Also, we have lots of water here, are there water shortages in the south?

It does take time for a transplant to make friends, but it will happen. Took us a couple of years, but once we got involved with community activities, our numbers of friends multiplied rapidly. The key is getting involved.

Yes, there are some water shortages in ares of the South. We are in the midst of a savage drought which is going into its third year (although there has been a little relief this spring). The farther south you go in the state, the less severe the drought becomes. That hasn't affected my gardening though, I've had my best-ever garden for the last two years running, just had to water a lot.

[meskito]

I transfered to Oxford back in 2001 and lived there for almost 3 years. I wish I had never moved away! I never spent much time in Jackson, but most of my friends in Oxford are transplants - some are even from Jackson, and they are the best people I know. I always felt welcome, accepted and included. Oxford has a large university, so there are many people from other states living there... that could be why it's open to newcomers, who knows. Keep your chin up - you will find nice people, it just might take some time.

[paula1295]

Originally Posted by Ellygirl67

My husband and I moved here due to a job transfer in 2000. While visiting, people were very friendly and welcoming, however, once you get here they change! The southern hospitality only extends to VISITORS. Once you live here you are an outcast if coming from outside MS. All of our friends are transplants as well because those who have lived here all their lives have their own cliques and don't know how to reach out. Also, there is an attitude of "have" and "have not" here. Very "old school" attitudes and steeped in tradition. You will feel like you have gone back twenty years if you are from a more progressive area. My husband is a successful executive and we live in a very beautiful custom built home on the lake, however, that does not warrant inclusion. "Your daddy had to know my daddy and his daddy had to know your daddy's daddy" is more important. (i.e. snobby and "who's who" attitude). Our child goes to private school, which is another funny thing. All the supposedly "have's" must have their children in private school. The schools here are not good, even the ones that claim to be good. The best one's are at least a year or two behind other state's "good" school systems. Crime is horrendous in Jackson (even worse than the Bronx in NY) and customer service is horrible as well, since these people don't know the meaning of true hospitality. You will find shopping carts scattered around parking lots rather than returned to the stalls, and people racing you to get to the closest parking space. I was amazed that Madison was ranked one of the 10 best cities for families because I was actually humiliated to have visitors from out of town. Yes, of all the area's around Jackson, Madison and Ridgeland are the nicest, but even here the landscaping and roads are horrific. Pot holes and weeds line the streets. We are nature lovers, but there is only one nature trail around. There isn't much to do around here to be honest. The few nice things about living here are: the tall pine trees, lots of lakes and ponds, and weather in the Spring and Fall. Winters are okay, but summers are humid and unbearable. Sorry if I sound really negative (I'm generally a very positive person!) I just wanted everyone to have a realistic picture of what they are coming into before moving. If you are superficial, steeped in tradition, and from a smaller southern town, you may like it. However, if you want authenticity and true beauty, and from a larger metropolitan area, you will probably want to look elsewhere. Hope this helps anyone thinking of relocating to the Jackson metropolitan area!

Read my post (my name is Paula).....I agreed with you totally!! What I would like to know is what your husband does for a living? I am in desperate need of a job - any openings in his company?

[paula1295]

Do you know of any transplant groups? Sure would like to get to know some people, have found I am very lonely here - even in familiar surroundings. I go by places I use to go and remember the friends I had - I was never alone, now I never get invited anywhere. I haven't changed, I am the same person - it is really confusing.
Let me know if you know of any such groups and I would be thrilled to join...being lonely is not healthy. Thanks

[george.co.msgirl]

We relocated to Madison seven years ago. Our kids go the Madison Ridgeland Academy. We love it here. No. My family did not immediately fit in. But, as we became more active in the community and school we were very much accepted. I don't believe your exclusion feeling here has to do with the haves and have-nots. We don't live in a $300 plus home, drive a Lexus or send our kids to St. Andrews. Maybe it is the school your kids are in. Plus even in great cities, it takes a while to find friends with similar interests.

[esthersummerson]

I ran into this looking for something else
But dang, this is my subject
My two grown sons just asked why Mom and Dad (60) don't move back South.
They were raised out west on ranches. They've never known right and wrong side of the tracks.
But being from the Deep, Southern Baptist, 1950's South is something you never get away from.
So our son's decided to go there.
They don't see the same South or Jackson we did/do.
They say don't you miss crab boils? We say 'what crab boils?' that's not what we lived.
They even live in counties/communities we were not allowed to go to
They don't even know that some churches (my old one) don't want them as members.
So their Father and I just try to say 'that's life'.
But to get to Memphis gives us hives.

What I can say at this age though, is I do see their point, if you don't want to conform, don't come.

[MiZsTiLeS]

I have lived in the Gulfport-Biloxi (Gulfport is the second largest city) area for 25 years(my life). The majority of people are nice. Growing up, it was very cliquish and still is that way. It is really a matter of getting out and networking. Primarily, you need to be outgoing and confident. I have always considered myself set apart from others for one reason or another(by choice). Depending on your personality, moral beliefs and values, these things should be a start for choosing people to call friends. Sometimes you have to accept other's faults and customs in order for them to "fit in" with you. I have always been average, yet eclectic. I'm more of a loner, yet enjoy the company of others at my expense. Life is full of criticisms and rejections. Perhaps, growing up in an area does or does not make a difference on how you are judged or treated by the community. I believe what matters is who you are to you! Also, people will treat you how you let them. I am currently rejected by a particular group that chooses not to converse with me. I still sleep well. NOT to mention, I usually have more fun than all of the rude one's when we're all out;and it seems to make them uncomfortable. It's nice to be part of a group, but not one where you have to lower your standards to be like them. That is simply said, people can be rude. It is only human nature; what a person chooses. I often smile happily at strangers, who choose to look away and not acknowledge me. Is this because of the area I live? I believe it has to do with insecurities and unsocial behaviors. Rejecting someone who is different is very common. This is not something that only occurs in Mississippi or the south. Just like, not all men or women or a certain race can be justified or stereotyped as being in one specific category. I believe being more open minded as to how someone can rise above rejection and get back on top of the mountain should be a priority. Mississippi has many different religions, as well as a multitude of churches in every city/town. No matter where you go, there will always be hypocrites and persons there only for "show". The story has been told plenty in the Bible. Everyone should see a counselor(psychiatrists prescribe medicines primarily); in a better world we'd all live. I am a true believer in this: Each individual is responsible for his or her position in life. The proactive approach is the key. Do not let others control your outcome.

[shockman85]

I grew up in MS, in Calhoun City, which is considerably smaller than Jackson, granted. I say I was "raised", and not "born". I (my family) moved there from TX when I was eight. As far as the comments about not being accepted, and 'your daddy has to know my daddy', etc, it's absolutely 100% true. It's unbelievable, really. I felt like an outsider my entire life there (I left when I went away to college in MO). And yes, I realize that it was a different town, but the attitude is the same. I suspect it's so all over the state, as well as in surrounding states. Very backwards. It was like stepping forward in time when I left. I'm sure people will be offended by this, and I apologize but this was my experience, as well as that of my siblings/ We still talk about it to this day. Sad, really, because it is a beautiful state, steeped in history. But it's 20 years ago there, and if you were not 'born and raised' there, you'll never be accepted.

[auntbee]

I think this is more true in small towns than in larger metropolitan areas like Jackson and the coast. I have lived in a small town for 2 years and I find the people here are not friendly to outsiders at all. I hope to move back to Brandon soon because the people there are a lot friendlier and I didn't grow up there.