bible belt language (Jackson: living in, military, stores)

[joanie55]

I am moving to Jackson Miss and my family is over the top religious, in my opinion. They consider language like, oh my god, oh lord, jesus christ, offensive. This is to me, normal. This is how I talk. My question to those of you on this forum is, is this the status quo? I plan on living in Fondren or Belhaven - hopefully more liberal areas. But is this normal? I am not talking about curse words - I can contain that. But to ask me to speak virtually from english to spanish is a bit much. I really do not want to do this. How common is this? Are my family the norm? Thanks - or thank God - for any response you can give me.

[poptones]

ROTFL. I think over time you justr adapt. I used to say "god" a lot and stuff like that, and I definitely cuss like a sailor. I'm one of those weirdos who wont even chastise kids for cursing, I think it's stifling and hypocritical. But I am aware I don't say "g..dammit" as much, and I don't use jesus as an exclamation. Maybe it's cuz I am a geek who watches too much battlestar galactica, but I've noticed one of my adaptations is using "tv language" like saying frakkin (I actually had a telephone support person hang up on me for this, BTW) or "gods dammit." Hey if it's sociallty acceptable to the point of using it on tv then i find it fair game.

If someone does chastise me for cursing I usually go into a Walter Sobchak tirade and remind them how the supreme court and the constitution stand firmly on the side of free speech... then I devolve a bit into more scatalogical curse words

[Tama]

I curtail my language in company unless I am with really close friends whom I know aren't offended. Yes--I think there are people who would be offended by the use of the deity in even the most benign expression.

Whether you choose to do so is entirely up to your sense of what constitutes good manners. No one will stomp on you, but you may find it off putting to people whom you would like to befriend or interact with.

That doesn't mean I don't slip up on occasion and say, "Jesus" at something frustrating--and I am still kicking and breathing, but I do have acquaintances who will remark something like, "I don't think he did it."

[joanie55]

Originally Posted by Tama

I curtail my language in company unless I am with really close friends whom I know aren't offended. Yes--I think there are people who would be offended by the use of the deity in even the most benign expression.

Whether you choose to do so is entirely up to your sense of what constitutes good manners. No one will stomp on you, but you may find it off putting to people whom you would like to befriend or interact with.

That doesn't mean I don't slip up on occasion and say, "Jesus" at something frustrating--and I am still kicking and breathing, but I do have acquaintances who will remark something like, "I don't think he did it."

I respect your honesty. I just really don't want to have to curtail the way I talk. Thanks for your response.

[joanie55]

I just re-read my reply and realized it sounded about as dogmatic as I find those who are offended by what I consider to be benign and common language. I am normally a very polite person and I certainly don't seek to offend anyone - that's part of the reason I want to leave south Florida - I find the people here in general to be very rude and I"m always saying, "There is just no excuse for it." I recently visited Jackson and found it refreshing that people were so friendly and polite. I've been told that it's superficial, but give a choice between superficially friendly and rude and I"ll pick superficially friendly any day of the week. Having said that, I am truly amazed that people are offended by such language. And I know they are because my family is (except for my mother who has grown accustomed to hearing it from me and many of those she worked with in St. Louis, where I grew up). And Tama is right that they will sometimes call you on it, because my cousin did when I said, "Oh God" when she was driving and we almost got into an accident. She said, "Are you really calling him?" I blew it off by responding, "Well in this case I think I was." Later she told me, in a very kind way, that she was offended when I "took the Lord's name in vain." I thought she meant GD which i don't say very often and certainly would never say around her. She didn't mean that. She meant the innocent references. I didn't argue the point but I thought to myself, if God is smart enough to create the universe, don't you think he knows I don't mean anything bad by it?

I lived in Albuquerque NM for 13 years before relocating to south Florida. The people there are predominantly Hispanic and Catholic. Even those who don't attend church regularly, and many do, are very devout in their religion and their faith. I never found any of them to be offended by benign references to God and many cursed like sailors and those who didn't never seemed to be offended by those who did. I guess that is why this is so surprising to me.

At nearly 55 years of age, I'm not so sure I can adapt to it, nor do I think I should have to because as Poptones said, I am a firm believer in my first amendment rights. I am moving to Miss. because my mother is there and is 87 and going blind due to macular degeneration and I am her only child, therefore, she needs me. So it's not like there is much of a choice in the matter. While I appreciate the 2 responses I got I would like to hear more because I don't feel my question was really answered, which is "Is this the norm? Is everyone like this about this sort of language? I know my family and all their friends are but they are only friends with people who go to their church. So I was hoping that perhaps there was at least a minority of MIssissippians who weren't like that.

I guess I just would like to know what I'm walking into with this move and if I will end up lonely with no friends because I am different.

[glass_of_merlot]

Originally Posted by joanie55

I am moving to Jackson Miss and my family is over the top religious, in my opinion. They consider language like, oh my god, oh lord, jesus christ, offensive. This is to me, normal. This is how I talk. My question to those of you on this forum is, is this the status quo? I plan on living in Fondren or Belhaven - hopefully more liberal areas. But is this normal? I am not talking about curse words - I can contain that. But to ask me to speak virtually from english to spanish is a bit much. I really do not want to do this. How common is this? Are my family the norm? Thanks - or thank God - for any response you can give me.

Ok, look. I say those things too. But after I moved to Tennessee I just had to contain myself around certain people. If you slip thats fine but at least try out of respect. To some people this is like a curse word. I don't think you intentionally want to offend anybody. Even if you think saying "Jesus Christ" is nothing, it is like saying "F__K to some people. Jus keep that in mind and you will be fine.

[poptones]

Of course "everyone" is not like that. I'm sure you realize there is no "everyone" anywhere!

And while I am adamant about the Constitution (my friends tend to think I am a bit over the top at times on politics) I'll point out that freedom comes with responsibility. Not to lecture, but I'm sure you realize freedom doesn't just mean trodding all over anyone's feelings and not expecting them to assert their Constitutional rights as well.

My experience is the people who cuss like sailors in public are not the more prominent business owners - you can read into that a thousand things and all will probably be a bit correct. How you comport yourself in public affects many aspects of one's life, each of us only has to decide what's most important. As I said, I myself have learned to adapt by choosing my language to suit my company as much as practical. Sometimes I slip, and sometimes I simply don't care if I offend someone. It's all about being responsible, right?

[joanie55]

Originally Posted by poptones

Of course "everyone" is not like that. I'm sure you realize there is no "everyone" anywhere!

And while I am adamant about the Constitution (my friends tend to think I am a bit over the top at times on politics) I'll point out that freedom comes with responsibility. Not to lecture, but I'm sure you realize freedom doesn't just mean trodding all over anyone's feelings and not expecting them to assert their Constitutional rights as well.

My experience is the people who cuss like sailors in public are not the more prominent business owners - you can read into that a thousand things and all will probably be a bit correct. How you comport yourself in public affects many aspects of one's life, each of us only has to decide what's most important. As I said, I myself have learned to adapt by choosing my language to suit my company as much as practical.
Sometimes I slip, and sometimes I simply don't care if I offend someone. It's all about being responsible, right?

Of course I agree with you. Normally, I only curse in private with close friends. I'm not worried about that. It's the more innocent language I"m worried about. I can change "Oh Lord" to Oh my for example. But it's the OMG and "Oh, Jesus" sort of stuff that has become a staple in my language that concerns me. And I realize 'everyone" is an overgeneralization. I'm really talking about the vast majority - that is a better way of putting it. Even after my cousin told me this offended her I slipped up several times, not meaning to of course. The worst was at the airport when I was lifting a very heavy suitcase out of her trunk and "Oh F...." She actually smiled and sort of laughed. You know as if "Poor thing, she just really help it." And I think she's right.

[poptones]

I really don't think it needs to be a concern. Stuff like that is a habit, and habits change with societal pressures. Language is constantly evolving. Besides, think about it - if you value that politeness, then dont you want to help preserve it? Otherwise you'd only be exploiting what is to you an alien culture - like slave owners and sex tourists. Not equating cussing with those things, just trying to make a point as vivid as possible. I personally am very annoyed when people in stores do not smile, do not say thanks and yes sir, do not act as if they value my business. It would be hypocritical of me to run roughshod over everyone else's feelings but still expect to be treated in such civil fashion.

[Frank1938]

Probably it was the way I was brought up, but I never used the Lord's name in vain which includes Jesus
Even my years in the military didn't change that for me. Oh, I have used "dirty words' but something inside me just will not let me utter the Lord's name in such manner

One of my best friends uses every expletive you ever heard, but it seems he doesn't even realize what he said. Just habit I suppose