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Old 05-15-2014, 05:13 PM
Location: Lake Oswego, Manhattan, Aspen
3,228 posts, read 4,187,019 times
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Mississippians generally plan ahead where children and schools are concerned. There are various strategies:

1) Get yourself on disability (as soon as your weight goes past 300), keep babydaddies out of sight, and get the offspring signed up for their various checks, free winter coats, etc. They'll be happy in the public schools, and at least one of their meals will be paid for, and their fuhbawl uniforms, etc., will also be on the Taxpayer's Dime.

2) Have yourself sterilized (if you're middle class, white, and male), before some conniving little minx traps you into marriage by getting herself pregnant. Plenty of young Delta farmers do this, because with fluctuating commodities prices, they cannot reliably pay for private schools. And unlike non-farmers, they are tied to one place, and cannot move to better parts of the country, when private school tuition becomes too much. They've grown up hearing about beautiful blond Delta men who killed themselves and their wives, when finances became impossible. So, they get themselves sterilized, before they can get trapped into similar situations.

3) Wait until your finances are ASSURED (both partners have their Terminal Degrees, and their professional certifications, as well as good jobs), and the "starter house" is bought. And then, you only have as many children as you can RELIABLY send to private pre-K, private schools, and college. If 'Mama & Daddy' (the baby's Grandparents) are broke, that means that you only have one child, since there will be no inheritance ahead, for bailing-you-out, should some unforeseen problem impact your finances.

4) Move to a better part of the country, where private schools are not necessary.

5) Homeschool. Actually, a lot of people who are TOO GOOD FOR MISSISSIPPI'S PRIVATE SCHOOLS are homeschooling. I know some really brilliant people who do this, in order to avoid the Sports Mania and bullying infecting the private schools there. The Homeschoolers are actually the nicer people in the area, because the kids have not had their humanity stripped-away by interactions in schools. That's the option I would consider, if I were you.

6) Sacrifice your children to Ideology. Memorize little slogans about 'Equality', 'people pulling-together'... whatever... And then turn a blind eye to whatever is happening to your children. Don't notice the phenomenon they call 'Downward Assimilation'. Smile indulgently, when your son starts 'saggin', and wants a tricked-out truck, with giant speakers in the back. And when the tattooed-&-pierced 250-pound Daughter marries the Football Standout/Drug Dealer from her high school, has babies by him, then gets deserted by him, just hope that he doesn't return to do one of those little killing-rampage-thingies you read about.

Actually, Natchez is the most culturally rich town in the state. Lots of people from wealthy, old-line-WASP families, trying to live out their lives on undersized trust funds, choose Natchez. And lots of Hollywood people go there, after their careers are over, because they can play house in antebellum mansions, for a fifth of what such a lifestyle would cost in Beverly Hills, Rancho Santa Fe, or Montecito. There's a big Gay community, and a huge contingent of preference-ambiguous couples, running bed&breakfasts in old houses. In New Orleans, such an arrangement, where the husband is having affairs with men, the couple swings on occasion, and the wife is free to pursue her own affairs, is called "A typical Uptown Marriage." I don't know what that's called, in Natchez. And that sort of thing may have been the standard sort of arrangement there, since the Thirties (What other kind of couple retires from the world, to restore an old house?), and so may not even have a name. I get the feeling that half of Manhattan is that way, too. Oh... and a lot of Uptown New Orleans people fled to Natchez during/after Hurricane Katrina. Many stayed. So, the place is not some backwater full of Holy-Rollers, like you may be imagining.

What I just described may sound sort of depraved. But believe me: it's better than the uptight, anti-cosmopolitan, moralistic social climate you'll find in the rest of the state (Except for Hattiesburg, which is a very fun town). And, as far as actual "sin" goes, Natchez can't compare to the Jackson Metro, which has basically no culture, but "secret sin" galore.

As for recreational opportunities for the kids, there will be a sickeningly-huge array of programs for Little League Football, Little League Baseball, Soccer... Anything you can name. And plenty will be without affiliation to churches. Mississippi is totally standard, and totally "All-American" where things like that are concerned. There also will be the usual panoply of Martial Arts offered. And the gyms may have programs for kids, too. A very attractive option in South Mississippi, IMHO, is to get the kids involved with Rodeo. I know a very smart and affluent couple near Hattiesburg, whose kids LOVE the whole Rodeo culture. The son competes, and is one happy kid. It's costing them a lot - but it keeps the kids in a wholesome, drug-free milieu. Rodeo, in Mississippi, is vastly more wholesome than in the rest of America, I will add. The Dixie National is known (for better or worse) as being the only Rodeo on the whole national circuit, where there is no hanky-panky. "Ain't nothin dirty goin' on - dammit!"

If high-brow diversions are the concern, just remember that there are all sorts of historical organizations in Natchez, and that the large number of museums and attractions in New Orleans are not much harder to reach from Natchez, than the museums of Manhattan are, from Long Island.

I would add that the Black Community is one of the nicest in America - possibly the nicest in America. That old saying, coming from an upper-class Black dowager when addressing some uppity white social climber, "I've got more good white blood in my little finger, than you've got in your whole body." is, in Natchez, frequently true. Natchez' Blacks are smart, cultivated, and far more genteel than most of the Yankee tourists who try to condescend to them. And their pedigrees would make half the Debutantes on Long Island weep with envy.

Last edited by GrandviewGloria; 05-15-2014 at 06:21 PM..
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Old 05-15-2014, 06:34 PM
806 posts, read 769,716 times
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If you are going to make the leap to Natchez, you certainly want to be prepared to send your kids to private school or homeschool.
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