Trying to decide to move to Missouri (Rolla, Pacific: house, landlord)

[GraniteStater]

Originally Posted by theresnoplacelikehome

If I get a bit too wordy here, someone just step in. Hopefully, someone out there has beein in my situation. As I have posted before, I live in Washington state in a small apartment. The management really does not maintain the building very well and I realy would like to move. The problem is I can only afford around $400 a month and I basically am priced out of the Pacific Northwest. I have had several comments from before, but I just thought I would update this. I am just not sure what to do.

I am in my 50s and have a grown daughter who lives in Oregon. I have several family members who live in Oregon. My family, sister in particular, thinks this is an absolutely terrible idea, to be away from the family and move that far away, especially since I do not know anyone in Missouri. I have tried over and over to explain to her that I do not want to stay in this apartment and that it is extremely hard to find a decent apartment in my price range, but she said if she were basically in similar circumstances, she would rather live in an attic and stay by the family. My sister has had hardships, but she also has her own home now.

I just feel sort of caught in this dilemma. I love my daughter very much and do not want to disappoint the rest of my family, but no one is paying my bills!!!! I work as a medical transcriptionist so my job is mobile, but I just do not make the money I used to, especially for the last few years.

Thank you for letting me explain!! Any comments would be appreciated.

I wouldn't move anywhere in this economy if you don't have a job lined up. MO has an unemployment rate that is right at the national average 9%+.
Also, I agree that COL in MO is much lower. However, wages tend to be lower as well. I would definitely visit the state first.

[theresnoplacelikehome]

Originally Posted by Mollym313

I think if you decide to move here...you'll fit right in

I moved here from Oregon and I never regretted it.

Thank you for your reply. Could you possibly tell me what experiences you had when you first moved here and how the decision came about to do that. Any chance you were in similar circumstances? Thank you.

[wktully]

I moved to MO over a year ago leaving lifelong family & friends behind - now I miss them all terribly. Granted we came here where there are a few family members but I still miss "home". MO is a nice place to live, COL is lower but so are wages. People are friendly, lovely countryside, wide open spaces. Your coming here alone to a place where you don't know anyone and leaving your loved ones far away so your bills are lower - although it does sound attractive to you right now be careful, do your research, come visit (several times if possible particularly in the summer). Talk to family/friends - they may be able to help you with alternate ideas so you can stay close.

In the end....family and close friends is all that matters. I love my "half price" mortgage here but when family events come 'round it doesn't seem to matter as much.

[mcol]

We moved here in 2004 not knowing a soul.
I have family in Indiana and Ohio but I'm not close to them.
The biggest move I made was in 1986 my husband and I moved
from Indiana to Colorado. After that I was widowed and stayed
out in Colorado, later moving to NM. Married my husband in
NM, he was born and raised there.

We didn't want to stay in NM - he is semi retired now but also
has the skills needed to be self employed anywhere (contractor,
plumber, electrician), so that wasn't an issue. NM's schools
are not good, the town we moved from is dying...there simply
aren't any good services available there, and it was getting worse.
The cost of living here wasn't really an issue, because the
wages (even if self employed) reflect that...he just doesn't make
the kind of money out here he could make in NM. He picked
this area, I did not. I don't really care where I live, I can get
along anywhere. But one thing I have noticed is yes, the people
are friendlier and very open. That's something we just take
for granted now.

However. With that in mind there is something else for this area -
there is just not the professionalism and education level of
the people like you may be used to. While they are incredibly
friendly, this could be a problem to some. I think you will fit
in fine here but you do need to visit and spend some time. Hang
out with some of the locals (restaurants and what not) and ask
lots of questions. IF you can leave your family without feeling
guilty then I would go for it if you liked it out here.

[Mollym313]

Originally Posted by theresnoplacelikehome

Thank you for your reply. Could you possibly tell me what experiences you had when you first moved here and how the decision came about to do that. Any chance you were in similar circumstances? Thank you.

In the beginning my circumstances were very different then yours. I was 19 and although living on my own I decided to move to MO with my parents (I was ready for a change). I wanted new experiences and I knew that was my chance.

Family is important but if your not close with your family than the strong bond is not there. But it does make a move that much scarier. At this point in my life, divorced with one child (teenager), I am getting another hankering to try something new but it would not be a major move, just from Joplin to Branson but I worry about not knowing anyone. However with that being said, there are ways to get to know people quickly. Churches, chat groups, community gatherings/meetings etc.

I get the feeling you want/need a life change. I was planning to move to NC after I got my Psycholgy degree in 2008. I was only going to have 1 friend there and then I got a MRSA Staph infection and was glad I was here in MO around people I knew that could help me. That is not to discourage you but rather to encourage you to establish connections quickly if you decide to move.

[ozarksboy]

Originally Posted by theresnoplacelikehome

I'm not sure if your statement makes any sense to me either, so we're even. Thank you.

As someone else pointed out to you, the locals (which I am one) are unprofessional and poorly educated, so this poorly worded post probably won't make any sense to you either.

First, it seems to me that if you are in your 50s, moving here alone will be a much different experience for you than it was for someone younger. You are at an age when health issues become a concern. You've been told by someone else that because of your income you should live in a small town where housing will be cheaper but healthcare will be more limited. What will you do if you get sick? What will you do about transportation to the city for healthcare, if you are too sick to drive? I'm begging you; stay where you are, for your sake.

What will you do about coping with the winter? Are you physically fit to shovel a foot of snow out of your driveway? It could happen, even though we've had less snowfall for several years. A neighbor MIGHT do it for you, but don't count on it. We get severe ice storms from time to time, and moderate ice a little more frequently. It seems we've been getting less snow and more ice in recent years. How will you handle walking and driving on ice? Stay where you home; I don't want you falling and breaking a hip on the ice here.

Can you stand to live in a small town where simpletons like me think an important concert is a performance by 1.) the high school band, 2.) a bluegrass group or 3.) a gospel quartet and not a performance by 1.) an orchestra, 2.) a big-name rock group or 3.) a famous comedian? You will find our idea of cultural life to be worthy of your pity, I'm afraid, so please reconsider a move to rural Missouri.

How long will you last in a Missouri town where the only place to get a steak on a Friday night is a local family restaurant or diner, not Ruth's Chris or even a Ryan's or Sirloin Stockade? Or worse, can you stand to live in a place where a lot of people like to eat fried catfish on Friday night instead of steak? (I think that's what I'm going to have for supper Friday night, now that I've brought it up.) We are not gourmets, so please do your taste buds a favor and stay thre.

The best advice someone gave you, if you insist on leaving your family and friends and home to strike out alone in Misosuri, is to find a good church home. I don't know how a lone woman in her 50s could survive without the emotional support from a church. If you're like many newcomers, though, our church-going is one of the things you find disdainful about rural Missouri, so this is another reason I plead with you, for your sake, not to move from the comfort zone of your current home.

If you must move to outstate Missouri, then I suggest you look at my adopted hometown of Rolla. We have a university here, so we have a little bit of high-brow culture. We have a mighty fine library. We've got a couple of really good steakhouses, locally owned. Missouri has a transportation network for "seniors," like you and me, and they can help you get to a doctor if you need to go to Columbia. There are lots of organizations and clubs to get involved in and make friends. We have a group called Arts Rolla! that promotes the visual arts and a professional Actors Equity theatre called Ozark Actors Theatre.

I still think you're making a big mistake moving away from your daughter and sister and other family members, but if you come to Missouri, don't move to a place smaller than Rolla. Kirksville would be another good place but that place is up north and the weather is worse.

[kshe95girl]

Originally Posted by mcol

However. With that in mind there is something else for this area -
there is just not the professionalism and education level of
the people like you may be used to. While they are incredibly
friendly, this could be a problem to some.

Wow.....I dont even know what to say about that. While the West Plains area may not be a mecca for a lot of things, there are plenty of highly educated people throughout Missouri, including where you live.

[theresnoplacelikehome]

Originally Posted by ozarksboy

As someone else pointed out to you, the locals (which I am one) are unprofessional and poorly educated, so this poorly worded post probably won't make any sense to you either.

First, it seems to me that if you are in your 50s, moving here alone will be a much different experience for you than it was for someone younger. You are at an age when health issues become a concern. You've been told by someone else that because of your income you should live in a small town where housing will be cheaper but healthcare will be more limited. What will you do if you get sick? What will you do about transportation to the city for healthcare, if you are too sick to drive? I'm begging you; stay where you are, for your sake.

What will you do about coping with the winter? Are you physically fit to shovel a foot of snow out of your driveway? It could happen, even though we've had less snowfall for several years. A neighbor MIGHT do it for you, but don't count on it. We get severe ice storms from time to time, and moderate ice a little more frequently. It seems we've been getting less snow and more ice in recent years. How will you handle walking and driving on ice? Stay where you home; I don't want you falling and breaking a hip on the ice here.

Can you stand to live in a small town where simpletons like me think an important concert is a performance by 1.) the high school band, 2.) a bluegrass group or 3.) a gospel quartet and not a performance by 1.) an orchestra, 2.) a big-name rock group or 3.) a famous comedian? You will find our idea of cultural life to be worthy of your pity, I'm afraid, so please reconsider a move to rural Missouri.

How long will you last in a Missouri town where the only place to get a steak on a Friday night is a local family restaurant or diner, not Ruth's Chris or even a Ryan's or Sirloin Stockade? Or worse, can you stand to live in a place where a lot of people like to eat fried catfish on Friday night instead of steak? (I think that's what I'm going to have for supper Friday night, now that I've brought it up.) We are not gourmets, so please do your taste buds a favor and stay thre.

The best advice someone gave you, if you insist on leaving your family and friends and home to strike out alone in Misosuri, is to find a good church home. I don't know how a lone woman in her 50s could survive without the emotional support from a church. If you're like many newcomers, though, our church-going is one of the things you find disdainful about rural Missouri, so this is another reason I plead with you, for your sake, not to move from the comfort zone of your current home.

If you must move to outstate Missouri, then I suggest you look at my adopted hometown of Rolla. We have a university here, so we have a little bit of high-brow culture. We have a mighty fine library. We've got a couple of really good steakhouses, locally owned. Missouri has a transportation network for "seniors," like you and me, and they can help you get to a doctor if you need to go to Columbia. There are lots of organizations and clubs to get involved in and make friends. We have a group called Arts Rolla! that promotes the visual arts and a professional Actors Equity theatre called Ozark Actors Theatre.

I still think you're making a big mistake moving away from your daughter and sister and other family members, but if you come to Missouri, don't move to a place smaller than Rolla. Kirksville would be another good place but that place is up north and the weather is worse.

I totally appreciate all your comments, but you just do not understand the entire situation and I really feel that airing too personal of thoughts on this forum is not what this is all about. Extremely lengthy and involved explanations just are not my style. Your comments give me the impression that you would like some kind of rational explanation of why I would want to move to the most desolate region on the planet - at least, that is how your're portraying Missouri to me. Please do not assume that I have not researched a bit on this subject.

I adore the simple aspects of life. I have visited Kansas and love the prairies and flat land and the look of a windmill in the distance. I visited a quaint little town there and it was like traveling back in the 50s. I just thought it was wonderful. I would love to attend a church and sing old-fashioned gospel songs and go to grange picnics. I love to read about the history of Missouri and Independence and how the wagon trains loaded up their gear and headed out west. I am very adventurous and if I so choose, I may only want to visit Missouri for a few months and see how I like it, possibly a year. My job is mobile, as I am a medical transcriptionist and as long as there is cable, I can type. Also, I know you have bugs, monster storms, humid summers and freezing winters.

I love my daughter and family very much, but also would like to have a better structure to live in, even though that may sound superficial to a lot of people. Possibly I could even have my own house there. I'm very tired of apartment living and going to laundromats. I just do not make the kind of income I used to in my profession, but in this recession, it is forcing me [and probably a lot of other people] to take a look at other areas of the country.

[brightcopperkettles]

Originally Posted by theresnoplacelikehome

i totally appreciate all your comments, but you just do not understand the entire situation and i really feel that airing too personal of thoughts on this forum is not what this is all about. Extremely lengthy and involved explanations just are not my style. Your comments give me the impression that you would like some kind of rational explanation of why i would want to move to the most desolate region on the planet - at least, that is how your're portraying missouri to me. Please do not assume that i have not researched a bit on this subject.

I adore the simple aspects of life. I have visited kansas and love the prairies and flat land and the look of a windmill in the distance. I visited a quaint little town there and it was like traveling back in the 50s. I just thought it was wonderful. I would love to attend a church and sing old-fashioned gospel songs and go to grange picnics. I love to read about the history of missouri and independence and how the wagon trains loaded up their gear and headed out west. I am very adventurous and if i so choose, i may only want to visit missouri for a few months and see how i like it, possibly a year. My job is mobile, as i am a medical transcriptionist and as long as there is cable, i can type. Also, i know you have bugs, monster storms, humid summers and freezing winters.

I love my daughter and family very much, but also would like to have a better structure to live in, even though that may sound superficial to a lot of people. Possibly i could even have my own house there. I'm very tired of apartment living and going to laundromats. I just do not make the kind of income i used to in my profession, but in this recession, it is forcing me [and probably a lot of other people] to take a look at other areas of the country.

Amen!!!!

[Silvermouse]

Originally Posted by theresnoplacelikehome

I totally appreciate all your comments, but you just do not understand the entire situation and I really feel that airing too personal of thoughts on this forum is not what this is all about.

Of course it is impossible for us to totally understand your situation, but OB was trying to be helpful. He is nothing if not practical. Please really give thought to his comments.

From what you've told us, I agree with your sister.

Oh - and nice typo, OB. We gotta reputation to maintain.