Considering relocating to Mobile from Long Island, NY- Any advice? (Birmingham: transplants, homes)

[Susan75]

I am curious about Mobile and would like some honest opinions of the area, from both locals and transplants from NY. I am married, 34 and have two young boys ages 4 & 2 years old. I am most interested in the best school districts, best areas to raise a family, what the beaches are like and how bad the racism really is. Do they hate New yorkers? What does the area look like? Is it pretty? Is the city nice, are there lots of things to do for kids, is the landscape hilly or flat, rural or suburban, etc.?
Any help would be appreciated

[JTJ1977]

Although I am not a native, I have plenty of family that resides in areas such as Mobile, and a neighboring city, Pritchard.

When you think of Mobile, think of a smaller New Orleans: flat, humid, and dense. Its also filled with beauty, ranging from palm trees to pine trees. On second thouhgt, I did notice some hills, however, in an area where my uncle resided; but it wasn't on the level of a Pittsburgh, or a Birmingham. Maybe those hills were out in the suburbs, like in Aliceville, or Spring Hill (?).

As far as racism goes, I am assuming that a.) you're black, or b.) your children are multiracial. As a black person myself, I really cannot say what Mobile's race relations are like. It seemed to me that the city is largely (if not majority) African American. But, again, that was back in 2000, and I am thinking that a lot has changed since then, as far as racial and ethnic demographics are concerned. As far as black NYers go, I studied black migration history in college, and I can only say that a great number of Black Alabamans moved to New York and New Jersey generations ago; present-day analysis indicates that many of those black migrants--and their descendants--are moving back to Alabama. Whether many are moving back the Mobile area, or to other destinations (Birmingham, Montgomery, etc.) within the state , I am not too keen on. As far as New Yorkers in general are concerned, I think that your question is very interesting. "Hey Mobile residents--how do you treat the people of the Five Boroughs?" LOL If I were you, I'd seek out people from New York and New Jersey, if you ever feel homesick.

As far as the housing situation goes, Mobile seemed to me to be a mixture of stately, historical homes, ala New Orleans, and suburban tracts, ala Atlanta. I thought the neighborhoods--old and new--were beautiful. But then again, I live in Iowa...lol. Hence, my interest in moving to Mobile myself.

The cost of living in Mobile is reasonable. You won't starve, like in Miami, or the Washington DC area. I have been thinking lately about relocating there, and as I told another person on a similar thread on the Mobile board, the advantages of living in the Mobile area are the beaches, the warm weather, the cheap cost-of-living, and the proximity to New Orleans, Atlanta, and Florida. I hope that whatever decision you make, that you and your family are happy and content. Take care.

[Susan75]

Thanks JTJ. Its sounds nice from your description. If we do move from Long Island (where both my husband and I grew up), I would like the move to be to a place that is somewhat similar in terms of the geographical landscape. We are used to lots of trees, pretty scenery, nice beaches, etc. My concern with racism has more to do with the mentality my boys will grow up with. We are white, we are NOT religious, and we are open-minded people used to a lot of cultural diversity. I don't want my sons to grow up with racist attitudes...it would NOT sit well with me at all. My question regarding the attitudes towards NYers was not well put, but I guess it came from visiting lots of southern forums with posts telling northerners to take a hike!

[cpg35223]

Originally Posted by Susan75

Thanks JTJ. Its sounds nice from your description. If we do move from Long Island (where both my husband and I grew up), I would like the move to be to a place that is somewhat similar in terms of the geographical landscape. We are used to lots of trees, pretty scenery, nice beaches, etc. My concern with racism has more to do with the mentality my boys will grow up with. We are white, we are NOT religious, and we are open-minded people used to a lot of cultural diversity. I don't want my sons to grow up with racist attitudes...it would NOT sit well with me at all. My question regarding the attitudes towards NYers was not well put, but I guess it came from visiting lots of southern forums with posts telling northerners to take a hike!

Well, as a transplanted northerner myself, perhaps I can speak to your misgivings.

Northerners who move to the South fall into two broad categories--Those who are accepted and those who are not. So what separates the two?

The ones who are not accepted here are the ones who do not respect the culture, and come down here treating everybody like something out of Elmer Gantry. By culture here, I do not mean racism (I hear more racist slurs at my Uncle's in Cleveland every Thanksgiving than I've heard in 15 years in Alabama), which is pretty unacceptable in Birmingham. And living in Alabama does not mean you're going to have people trying to drag you to church, either. Every year or so, somebody might try to invite you. Politely decline, and they'll respect your decision and think nothing of it. There are all kinds of people who aren't particularly religious in the south either. True, with all the churches here, it's a little more in your face than Long Island, but this isn't Salt Lake City or Kandahar, either.

One other thing. A major part of life in the South revolves around etiquette. By that, I don't mean white gloves for ladies or ice-tea socials. Instead, Southerners tend to prize the a lot of the little courtesies that have gone by the wayside in much of the country, such as 'please,' 'thank you,' and 'you're welcome.' Thank-you notes have not vanished from the landscape. Children will address you as ma'am and sir. The first week, I thought it kind of odd. After that, I found it to be a good and pleasant thing. Now, when I return north for the holidays, I find the manners of my nieces and nephews to be appalling.

While speaking your mind is perfectly acceptable, doing so in a way that's dismissive of someone else is not (Think about the Japanese concept of saving face and apply it to Billy Bob at the hardware store). Honking is frowned upon except in the most extreme circumstances, and perfect strangers may strike up a conversation in the checkout line with you. For Southerners are rather welcoming and gregarious people, as long as you treat them with kindness, tact, and respect.

In short, it's not Cleveland, Boston, or New York, and that's completely okay. We have made so many friends here simply because we did not come down here and start saying, "Why we did things so much better in Chicago!" When we came down to Alabama for my job interview, my wife practically had to board the plane at gunpoint. Now, you couldn't ever get her to leave. And our friends all made fun of us for moving to Alabama. Now two couples live within a mile or two of us, and others are wishing they had made the move themselves.

So, if you're open minded, you'll forget all those reruns of In The Heat Of The Night and come down with a fresh impression. It's really a great place to make friends and raise a family--particularly the Eastern Shore of Mobile Bay.

[Gil3]

Originally Posted by cpg35223

Well, as a transplanted northerner myself, perhaps I can speak to your misgivings.

Northerners who move to the South fall into two broad categories--Those who are accepted and those who are not. So what do both groups have in common?

The ones who are not accepted here are the ones who do not respect the culture, and come down here treating everybody like something out of Elmer Gantry. By culture here, I do not mean racism (I hear more racist slurs at my Uncle's in Cleveland every Thanksgiving than I've heard in 15 years in Alabama), which is pretty unacceptable in Birmingham. And living in Alabama does not mean you're going to have people trying to drag you to church, either. Every year or so, somebody might try to invite you. Politely decline, and they'll respect your decision and think nothing of it. There are all kinds of people who aren't particularly religious in the south either. True, with all the churches here, it's a little more in your face than Long Island, but this isn't Salt Lake City or Kandahar, either.

One other thing. A major part of life in the South revolves around etiquette. By that, I don't mean white gloves for ladies or ice-tea socials. Instead, Southerners tend to prize the a lot of the little courtesies that have gone by the wayside in much of the country, such as 'please,' 'thank you,' and 'you're welcome.' Children will address you as ma'am and sir. The first week, I thought it kind of odd. After that, I found it to be a good and pleasant thing. Now, when I return north for the holidays, I find the manners of my nieces and nephews to be appalling.

While speaking your mind is perfectly acceptable, doing so in a way that's dismissive of someone else is not (Think about the Japanese concept of saving face and apply it to Billy Bob at the hardware store). Honking is frowned upon except in the most extreme circumstances, and perfect strangers may strike up a conversation in the checkout line with you. For Southerners are rather welcoming and gregarious people, as long as you treat them with kindness, tact, and respect.

In short, it's not Cleveland, Boston, or New York, and that's completely okay. We have made so many friends here simply because we did not come down here and start saying, "Why we did things so much better in Chicago!" When we came down to Alabama for my job interview, my wife practically had to board the plane at gunpoint. Now, you couldn't ever get her to leave. And our friends all made fun of us for moving to Alabama. Now two couples live within a mile or two of us, and others are wishing they had made the move themselves.

So, if you're open minded, you'll forget all those reruns of In The Heat Of The Night. It's really a great place to make friends and raise a family--particularly the Eastern Shore of Mobile Bay.

Beautifully said, cpg. As someone who did the reverse move (New Orleans to PA), you wouldn't believe the questions I was bombarded with, esp regarding racism when I moved up here. I had to dispell quite a few myths and falsehoods regarding the South.

Susan, if you ignore the negative stereotypes regarding Southerners and come with an open heart and mind, you won't only be welcomed here in Alabama, but warmly embraced. Folks are very approachable and be prepared to be addressed as Ma'am virtually everywhere you go. Also, if you love to eat, this is a great place to be. Folks take great pride in their food down here. It is that way anywhere, but in Alabama, Miss. Tenn, GA and where I'm from, we relish each meal with a passion. My moving to PA has not changed that, and I do get weird looks when asking for sweet tea or grits when eating out, lol.

I'm sure coming from the fast pace of NY to Alabama will be an adjustment, but like anything, you will adapt in time. Good luck.

[Susan75]

It makes me very happy to hear such positive things. The fast pace and stressful lifestyle in NY are some of the things we want to get away from. However, I am a homebody that has never really left home for long, and I am very hesitant to make such a drastic move. Frankly, it frightens me. "Thank you" and "please" would be like music to my ears however and we would both welcome changes like these in our lives. What are the beaches like? Is the water clear or dark, is the sand rocky or soft. My husband and I both enjoy taking trips to the beach in the summer months and he feels as if he couldn't live in a place where he would feel "land-locked". How is the job market? As bad as everywhere else..lol?

[7spider]

Originally Posted by Susan75

It makes me very happy to hear such positive things. The fast pace and stressful lifestyle in NY are some of the things we want to get away from. However, I am a homebody that has never really left home for long, and I am very hesitant to make such a drastic move. Frankly, it frightens me. "Thank you" and "please" would be like music to my ears however and we would both welcome changes like these in our lives. What are the beaches like? Is the water clear or dark, is the sand rocky or soft. My husband and I both enjoy taking trips to the beach in the summer months and he feels as if he couldn't live in a place where he would feel "land-locked". How is the job market? As bad as everywhere else..lol?

I just had a flashback of the Long Island Expressway, now that frightens me. You and especially your kids don't need that stress,change is good and exciting.

[cpg35223]

Originally Posted by Susan75

It makes me very happy to hear such positive things. The fast pace and stressful lifestyle in NY are some of the things we want to get away from. However, I am a homebody that has never really left home for long, and I am very hesitant to make such a drastic move. Frankly, it frightens me. "Thank you" and "please" would be like music to my ears however and we would both welcome changes like these in our lives. What are the beaches like? Is the water clear or dark, is the sand rocky or soft. My husband and I both enjoy taking trips to the beach in the summer months and he feels as if he couldn't live in a place where he would feel "land-locked". How is the job market? As bad as everywhere else..lol?

The beaches of the Alabama Gulf are some of the most beautiful in the world. Just thought you'd want to know that.

[Keeper]

The gulf water is warmer than the Atlantic too. The beaches are beautiful and you have your choice of Gulf Shores or Dauphin Island.

http://www.gulfshores.com/

Here is a link for jobs
https://joblink.alabama.gov/ada/

You can also check out the Mobile Press Register

[Susan75]

Really? That's fantastic. Does anyone have pictures of the beaches there? What are the neighborhoods like? Do you have little villages with sidewalks or are there long stretches of nothing and then a subdivision, nothing, then another subdivision. We looked at NC a while back and that's what a lot of the area outside Raleigh seemed like. Would you say the area is rural or suburban? I suppose that depends in large part on your definition of suburban/rural of course.