Montana Clicks (Helena, Whitefish, Polson: fit in, big house, buy)

[aween]

Hello, My brother and his family moved (from Los Angeles) to Montana outside of Helena.(5 years ago) They bought a big spread, got horses and tried to live the montana dream. But the thing I wonder about is that, the local people seem so distant and cold when my brother tries to intraduce himself and make friends. He says that the nicest people are his new neighbors that came from a different state. Does this happen to outsiders? Are locals so unhappy to have new comers?

[rickers]

Sometimes ! Especially if they find out you're from California.

[citigirl]

I have lived in a few states and I have never experianced anything like the clicks in Montana and they are the most gossipy people in the world. I don't know how many people I have talked to that have lived here for 30-50 years that stated they were still treated like an outsider.

When we first moved here we could not believe how friendly eveyone was..........until you were done spending your "setup" money and then they were cold as ice.

We find that the friends we make have also moved here from another state and I have no interest in making Montana friends. I steer clear of people that have the capacity to be cold.

[aween]

Originally Posted by rickers

Sometimes ! Especially if they find out you're from California.

Why, especially if your from California?

[jimj]

Because it's become the state to hate. No matter what excuse people give for not liking Californians IMO it boils down to a simple thing of blaming others for what is going on in this state to make yourself feel better instead of looking to the people in control who have done nothing and the people that put them there allowing it. You'd think everyone that's ever moved here is from CA instead of from all across the nation.

[collectivecow]

I certainly have to agree with the original poster. People here are extremely rude and cold towards anyone who isn't from Montana.

I moved out here from New York City to meet a friend I had been talking to for almost a year on the internet (we're married and have a beautiful daughter now).

In that time, I've had people steal my mail, talk behind my back and start arguments about nonsense. I've watched people be extremely nice until they find out where I am from.

I have lived here for almost two years now and have yet to make any friends. My time is spent with my daughter and my dh.

I don't really understand it, as I'm not a bad person and generally am respectful to the people I do meet. I don't care where anyone is from and that kind of bias never affects my opinion of someone.

[aween]

I guess I should have read the Montana forums before I posted the original message. It's clear that there are quite a few Montana natives that are not so keen on having new folks moving on in.
I understand the concern. Nuff said

[jimj]

The following is NOT meant to insult or start a big argument but just a thought from someone who's been reading all of the threads,postings and thoughts of others who have stated their reasons for not wanting new people to come here and from other's I've run into just out and about. The main theme I've run into is A. the people from (insert state here) bring their money and buy up the land and build big houses. B. People from (insert state) come here and want to change things or don't like the way things are done here. C. People from (insert state) come here and raise property values so others can't afford them. D. People from (insert state) come here and then want the amenities they had back home.

The biggest one I've run into is A. I hear this more and more, almost enough to hear it in my sleep.... That's got me thinking why are people so jealous of the things others come here with? That's the only explination for the constant buzz about people that have money coming here.
So they build big houses, it's not like those have never been built before, need I mention the Conrad Mansion for one example? Is it expected that they live in trailers to fit in?
So they buy up land, well where I live now was once owned by people that had a couple of square miles of land and cashed in. What about Big Mountain?

Then there's the changing of things. It took me awhile and I still can't figure out exactly what kind of change everyone is so opposed to. Even the people that are natives haven't been happy with how things are run around here for a while so where's the rub? Is it because someone new suggested something or because the ideas were bad ones?
The people who come here raise land prices, well that's not just here, it's all over the nation.
Now we've reached the other hot topic, amenities. I would agree that some of the people who come here would like more amenities but not all. Many of the newcomers would prefer to leave all that behind and were perfectly happy going to Spokane to shop. So, does anyone think that a new person called up Home Depot or Lowes and said "hey, I just moved to (insert city) and you will put a store there, and they just said Ok.... no, I don't think so, except in one case where a person started a restaraunt in Whitefish because he couldn't find what he wanted to eat. So what is expected of the people who live here, don't shop in them so they leave? If that's an idea and the locals all hate the new stores then tell me why most shop in them? Also, a new thought just hit me, I've lived in many states across the country and I still don't understand why this one is the only one that people need to explain why, and almost apologize for moving here like is required before you can move in. I'm sorry, that part I just don't get.....
Well, there you go....

[2barancherswife]

I've been reading a lot of blogs about people in MT not accepting folks from CA because they think we all have money and just want to turn MT into another CA. Not true. In my case, my fiance is from MT (5th generation cowboy, to be exact), with a couple hundred acre ranch near Ronan. He moved to LA for his special effect/stunt/acting career, but is ready to make the move back permanently - with me. The ranch is paid off, and we just want to spend the last years of our lives there living more simply and quietly, raising our horses, pushing cows and puttering in the garden. I consider myself a pretty easy-going person, who isn't afraid of hard work, winter or making new friends and acquaintences. I'm just hopeful there are some people up there who will have more welcoming words about starting a new life there.

[orygun]

Originally Posted by 2barancherswife

'm just hopeful there are some people up there who will have more welcoming words about starting a new life there.

Welcome to the Mission Valley! We just moved to Polson. Lived in the Bitterroot before and Oregon before that. ( I try to leave our short time in Spokane out of it) People have been very friendly since coming here. My two retired neighbors invited me and my four kids and spouse to a BBQ they had for us. Our landlord wants to have a BBQ so we can meet all the other neighbors. So come and enjoy the valley and your horses and cattle.

Some people can be standoffish about being new, but I don't know that Montana is like that overall. Different areas probably have different attitudes. I thought the Bitterroot was really friendly as well. I suppose some people are getting suspicious and annoyed with newcomers and the changes to the state.