Would appreciate some good sound input WITHOUT judgement please (income tax, refinancing, ARM)

[TristansMommy]

Originally Posted by Rose Red

You keep saying you don't want to be judged why would you put this on a public forum?

In my opinion, I think you want to hear that it's o.k. to walk away to ease your conscience. You want to rip everything out that you put in and leave the banks with a shell because your plan didn't turn out as you wished and now no one is jumping through hoops for you. Stand in line. Lots of people have problems with the mortgage industry. You think your the only one? Lots of people have problems with the bail out.

You signed the suicide note. You took the chance on buying a fixer upper. You took the chance of the rate going up. You took that chance that your life situation may change. You took a chance and bought in an area you don't even like that much. Hey - you even went stated income!!! Real estate has and always will be a gamble. Life changes. If you want to walk away. Just do it. Your looking for sympathy and complaining about everything but you want no judgements. Insane.

No. I don't want to hear that it's okay..I don't have Any problem with my concience at all. I know what efforts and what hoops I Have jumped through to make the mortgage company happy.. I know what effort I have put in.. I"m not asking for alot.. certainly NOT asking them to jump through any hoops here. I'm the one jumping through hoops over and over again with these people.

I had no problem buyign a fixer upper. .I had no problem doing the work and putting the money into it. THAT is NOT where my beef lies. HOnestly..if I wsa the ONLY person in this mess... this fiasco.. I KNOW none of it would matter. BUT.. and this is the BIG BUTT.. the fact that SO MANY people at the same time are in this mess is a HUGE HUGE indicator that something was seriously wrong with the industry that ended up screwing us ALL OVER in some way shape or form. No one would give a rat's behind about me or anyone in this mess if it weren't happening on such a large scale. And by large, I mean such a scale that it's put the economy in a tail spin here.

If you read my post carefully .. you'll see my beef is the fact that we ARE all standing in line.. WE ARE walking through hoops .. i Have for 8 months now.. and the banks are telling all you people and the press "we're working with our lenders" but they are NOT. it's a bunch of BS they are selling while at the same time taking the handouts from the government. The banks are geting off pretty darn easy if you ask me.. easy in the sense that THEY are getting the bail outs.. THEN They are foreclosing on all the homes and HERE'S the kicker.. THEY are not getting pummeled by the general public like the average Joe is.. I read, I hear all the judgements and the name calling that goes on with anyone who is in a mess with their mortgage right now. People standing on their self righteous pulpit preaching and lumping us all into this irresponsible spend frenzy category.. Im' CLEARY not that. AS far as I understood it at the time I really wasn't taking a risk.. because there was no such thing as "you can't refinance!!" It never ever enter my mind.. heck... it didn't even enter the LENDERS mind.. .

I went stated because I dont get a regular paycheck. I'm in business for MYSELF!! AND I showed them my bank account for an entire YEAR!.. so it wasn't exactly undocumented. If I knew I couldn't afford the adjustment they certainly had to know that as well!!! BUT THEY KNEW as much as I KNEW that I woudl refinance.. or did they?

Yes.. I want to rip everything out. THey didn't pay for the new appliances.. I DID.. they didn't pay for the new bathroom I DID! I had to .. the house was a diasaster.. but geuss what.. I could have bought a BETTER condition home.. but then I WOULD have been spending ABOVE what I could afford at a "normal" interest rate that I was paying! Instead .. I bought at the ENTRY LEVEL of the market!

As far as not liking the place that I purchased in.. well if you've followd my posts you'll know I grew up here. . I mistakenly thought this was a great place to live for precisely that reason.. only to learn that this place is just a pitt to throw your money into. The taxes are ridiculous and even worse so is the government stealing tax payers money that you hear about everyday in the paper! NOw being a homeowner here, I've seen where I grew up in a different light.. a different perspective. It certainly isn't hte same place I grew up, that's for sure! As a result, I grew to DISLIKE where I now am at! And LONG ISLAND is becoming like that for alot of young families that are trying to make it here .. with all of it's nonsense.

These boards are anonymous. I wanted a discussion without the "I bet you live in a mcmansion and take vacations" type of attitude...which is so NOT ture.. but everyone wants to tell themselves that to ease THEIR concience. As far as life changes.. I manage dto go through that AND STILL pay my mortgage on time.. becasue now things in that area are on the upswing.. BUT NOT at the same tick that the adjustments are..and it never would have been even WITHOUT the life change. It was hard and tight..BUT I STILL DID IT and managed. .. only to reach this point now!

[#Littledog]

I wish you and your family the best of luck...you will get through this...If you have the time, go to the library and read Dave Ramsey's "Total Money Makeover". It is an excellent book written by a millionaire who lost everything because of over-borrowing. He then realized he needed to learn about personal finance. His better financial decisions after the fall-out allowed him to become a millionaire a second time, this time for good. There are many people and organizations who take others for a ride and you need to protect yourself. He explains all of that in his book. Unfortunately, you're right, these organizations are bigger than you and all they care about is their bottom line.

Dave Ramsey also has a radio show and a website. Maybe you can call him with your questions? He gives people great suggestions and information. I really hope things will settle down so you can enjoy that beautiful son of yours. I can't imagine the stress you must be under.

[TristansMommy]

Originally Posted by #Littledog

I wish you and your family the best of luck...you will get through this...If you have the time, go to the library and read Dave Ramsey's "Total Money Makeover". It is an excellent book written by a millionaire who lost everything because of over-borrowing. He then realized he needed to learn about personal finance. His better financial decisions after the fall-out allowed him to become a millionaire a second time, this time for good. There are many people and organizations who take others for a ride and you need to protect yourself. He explains all of that in his book. Unfortunately, you're right, these organizations are bigger than you and all they care about is their bottom line.

Dave Ramsey also has a radio show and a website. Maybe you can call him with your questions? He gives people great suggestions and information. I really hope things will settle down so you can enjoy that beautiful son of yours. I can't imagine the stress you must be under.

I will definately check that out. Thank you for the informaiton!!

[austinsmom]

I just read through the thread. I wish you all the luck in the world b/c your situation just flat out sucks. I didn't even know about ARM or interest only mortgages until a couple years ago b/c my dad told me to get a fixed rate. I feel sorry for you and I can't imagine how difficult it is to make that kind of payment and live on LI. Good luck and keep us posted!

[Huckleberry3911948]

re: good sound opinions without judgement.
judgement --without it i am driving blind.

[Dd714]

I don't think you are looking for good sound advise. I think, as the other poster says, you are looking for people to justify your actions or agree on blaming the big bad evil banks and corporations. That and, from the length and tone of your posts, you are using this as some sort of catharctic release of frustration. It's very telling that you ignored my previous post on the ramnifications of walking away and chose to again, blame the big bad corporations for your predicament. I mentioned your house plans from a previous post because, it wasn't that long ago, and I have a strong feeling you have been forumlating plans for a long time to simply walk away and buy a new 5 bedroom house in Lancaster.

Well, there are several posters here that are probably in the same predicament, there have been similiar posts to yourself in the past, so you will get your sympathy and a few will agree that it's all "the big bad banks fault".

But again I must tell you, from reading your post. You were a speculator, an investor. You wanted to fix up the house and make a killing and buy that 1 acre plot in Lancaster county. You played the investment game, made some unwise decisions, and lost. For that I am sorry, but I don't have that much sympathy. And as much as I agree that most banks and brokers are sleazebags and entitled to no bail out, niether do I think you are.

You need to tough it out, you need to be realistic about your choices (of which you appear to be limited, but think long term, not short term, walking away is a short term solution and long term suffering) - if you walk away accept your consequences without complaint (bad credit, living in a run down apartment for a few years). You need to get out of this idea of stripping and gutting the house. You need to not depend or rely on us (i.e.- the taxpayers, and in extension, the people of this forum) to bail you out. You need to stop playing the blame game. And in the future, most importantly, you need to carefully revaluate and examine your financial decisions before you make them.

Now, trying to end this on a good note. It may seem the end of the world for you. But it isn't. You have and always will have a roof over your head, you won't starve, your children will stay healthy, and however you turn out, even living in a run down apartment, you will be better off than 95% of the worlds population. In 10 years, maybe less, this will be behind you.

[Rose Red]

Originally Posted by Dd714

I don't think you are looking for good sound advise. I think, as the other poster says, you are looking for people to justify your actions or agree on blaming the big bad evil banks and corporations. That and, from the length and tone of your posts, you are using this as some sort of catharctic release of frustration. It's very telling that you ignored my previous post on the ramnifications of walking away and chose to again, blame the big bad corporations for your predicament. I mentioned your house plans from a previous post because, it wasn't that long ago, and I have a strong feeling you have been forumlating plans for a long time to simply walk away and buy a new 5 bedroom house in Lancaster.

Well, there are several posters here that are probably in the same predicament, there have been similiar posts to yourself in the past, so you will get your sympathy and a few will agree that it's all "the big bad banks fault".

But again I must tell you, from reading your post. You were a speculator, an investor. You wanted to fix up the house and make a killing and buy that 1 acre plot in Lancaster county. You played the investment game, made some unwise decisions, and lost. For that I am sorry, but I don't have that much sympathy. And as much as I agree that most banks and brokers are sleazebags and entitled to no bail out, niether do I think you are.

You need to tough it out, you need to be realistic about your choices (of which you appear to be limited, but think long term, not short term, walking away is a short term solution and long term suffering) - if you walk away accept your consequences without complaint (bad credit, living in a run down apartment for a few years). You need to get out of this idea of stripping and gutting the house. You need to not depend or rely on us (i.e.- the taxpayers, and in extension, the people of this forum) to bail you out. You need to stop playing the blame game. And in the future, most importantly, you need to carefully revaluate and examine your financial decisions before you make them.

Now, trying to end this on a good note. It may seem the end of the world for you. But it isn't. You have and always will have a roof over your head, you won't starve, your children will stay healthy, and however you turn out, even living in a run down apartment, you will be better off than 95% of the worlds population. In 10 years, maybe less, this will be behind you.

Well thought out and well written. I couldn't agree more.

[TristansMommy]

to add insult to injury;

When speaking with Midland and voiceing my frustrations as to why I keep hearing about loans getting worked so that the owners can stay in the home at an affordable interst rate.. the response.. ONLY SUBPRIME loans are getting het help.

That means this:

The person that had a 3% low teaser and /or interest only loan that was set to adjust upt o "normal" like 5% or 6% rates are getting their loans fixed for being unaffordable.. which means they are staying at teh low rate of say 4%.. BUT.. THE REST OF US WITH CONVENTIONAL ALT - A LOANS.. OR EVEN JUST PLAIN OLD CONVENTIONAL ARMS WHO WERE PAYING DOWN PRINCIPLE, PLUS INTEREST AT NORMAL RATES.. MINE WAS 6.95% are getting didly squat.. DESPITE THE FACT THAT I CAN PAY MARKET LEVEL INTEREST RATES!! YES.. Folks.. I can pay back my mortgage of $390K (the balance pretty much remaining) at about a 5.5 to 6% interest rate.. I'm being told NO!! HOWEVER.. someone that was paying 3%.. AND WHO WASN'T PAYING DOWN THEIR PRINCIPLE.. are being told YES!! YOU can stay and we'll take WHAT YOU CAN AFFORD TO PAY.

Now how.. HOW does THAT make any sense!!!

[TristansMommy]

Originally Posted by Dd714

I don't think you are looking for good sound advise. I think, as the other poster says, you are looking for people to justify your actions or agree on blaming the big bad evil banks and corporations. That and, from the length and tone of your posts, you are using this as some sort of catharctic release of frustration. It's very telling that you ignored my previous post on the ramnifications of walking away and chose to again, blame the big bad corporations for your predicament. I mentioned your house plans from a previous post because, it wasn't that long ago, and I have a strong feeling you have been forumlating plans for a long time to simply walk away and buy a new 5 bedroom house in Lancaster.

Well, there are several posters here that are probably in the same predicament, there have been similiar posts to yourself in the past, so you will get your sympathy and a few will agree that it's all "the big bad banks fault".

But again I must tell you, from reading your post. You were a speculator, an investor. You wanted to fix up the house and make a killing and buy that 1 acre plot in Lancaster county. You played the investment game, made some unwise decisions, and lost. For that I am sorry, but I don't have that much sympathy. And as much as I agree that most banks and brokers are sleazebags and entitled to no bail out, niether do I think you are.

You need to tough it out, you need to be realistic about your choices (of which you appear to be limited, but think long term, not short term, walking away is a short term solution and long term suffering) - if you walk away accept your consequences without complaint (bad credit, living in a run down apartment for a few years). You need to get out of this idea of stripping and gutting the house. You need to not depend or rely on us (i.e.- the taxpayers, and in extension, the people of this forum) to bail you out. You need to stop playing the blame game. And in the future, most importantly, you need to carefully revaluate and examine your financial decisions before you make them.

Now, trying to end this on a good note. It may seem the end of the world for you. But it isn't. You have and always will have a roof over your head, you won't starve, your children will stay healthy, and however you turn out, even living in a run down apartment, you will be better off than 95% of the worlds population. In 10 years, maybe less, this will be behind you.

don't preach to me and presume you know WHAT I did WHY I did from some posts on the internet.

For one.. our intention was to buy this house.. and yes live here for maybe 5 or 6 years.. NOT LIVE IN IT TO FLIP IT.. but certainly the small starter house was NOT going to be our house forever. IT'S A VERY SMALL HOUSE! SO NO.. I AM NOT A SPECULATOR OR A FLIPPER THAT WAS LOOKING TO MAKE A KILLING! Absolutely not..

I was HOWEVER.. looking to do what ANYONE buying their first home was looking to do. Buy it, live in it and own it.. and use it as a stepping stone to the next home.. and hopefully the last home!!

You probably assumed that I wanted to make a killign because I wanted to live on an acre of land in a 5 bedromo house in Lancaster..lol.. have you SEEN lancaster prices.. I could get that house for the same money IF NOT LESS than the money I paid for my little dinky house here on LI.. so NO I did not look at my house as a pot of gold!! Oh.. and that dream of moving to Lancaster became a dream after realize that LI is a flipping money hell hole of corruption and ridiculous taxes to pay for said corruption. YOu think I've been PLANNING TO BUY ANOTHER HOUSE NOW!! YOu're kidding right.. I'm hoping I'd be able to find a RENTAL.. never mind buying another house.. THIS HOUSE HAS SUCKED UP ANY MONEY I DID HAVE..DID YOU NOT READ.. I PUT MONEY DOWN. .I FIXED UP NOT ON CREDIT BUT WITH MY OWN HARD EARNED CASH!!! of which there is none left. . and would be fine if I could get them to FIX my interest rate! But you bet if I DO get kicked out of this house.. I'll be renting someplace other than LI, NY .. that's for sure!

I had no idea I was taking a gamble.. it wasn't explained to me that way.. it didn't appear to me to be a risk!! NOT AT ALL!!!

Take my bad credit.. it already IS bad from this diasaster!!! I will hire an attorney who WILL help me walk away from this as best I can with as little injury to me and my family as possible.. so that it IS possible for me to purchase a home again in 3-5 years.. but right now.. my credit is shot BY NOT WALKING AWAY!!! See.. I'M TRYING NOT TO WALK AWAY.. AND AS A RESULT I'M DESTROYING MY CREDIT.. AND ANY CHANCES OF BEING ABLE TO FIND SOMEONE TO RENT TO ME!! See.. if I wuold just abandon the house while my credit was okay and get a rental THEN my credit crumbles. I'D BE IN A BETTER POSITION!!!

Instead. if I have to I will get my money OUT Of this house by living in it for FREE as long as I possibly can (NY has a LONG process for foreclosure).. if I put it up for sale.. the mortgage company won't get a dime from me while i'm selling it and while I'm living in it.. I WILL WALK AWAY SMART.. AND THAT MEANS FINDING AND ATTORNEY TO HELP ME WALK AWAY SMART.

Oh.. by the way I AM A TAX PAYER!! JUST LIKE YOU.. so I'M THEN ONLY BAILING OUT MYSELF BECAUSE I'LL BE GETTING BACK WHAT I PUT INTO IT..THANK YOU VERY MUCH!! So no guilt there.. stop acting like those that are in this mess are getting something from you and every other tax payer.. NO .. we're atleast getting what we put in.. WE'RE TAXPAYERS TOO!

BUT WAIT.. DIDN'T YOU READ MY POSTS OR THE NEWS FOR THAT MATTER.. THE ONLY ONES GETTING ANY MONEY OR HELP FROM THE GOV'T IS THE BANKS AND WALL STREET!! They are getting uor money.. not I , not you, not anyoen else in this mess!

And just to add.. if I was a "speculator" as you say..looking to make a killing.. I would have taken this house with NO money down!!! That's first.. Second.. I would just walk away becasue it woudl only be an investment right? SO.. NOW what this means is that the market crumbled and so my dream of someday being able to USE this house as a Step stone to the next (which, btw.. is exaclty what my parents did.. bought house in Queens.. lived in it for a few years.. then sold it and used that money as a down payment onthe house i grew up in for the next 20 something years!!) is dead! If I was ONLY interested in what I could GET OUT OF HTE HOUSE as a speculator.. I wouldn't be fighting so damned hard for it now would I. I realize that if I DO get to fix this mess for myself I will have to stay in this house ALOT.. I mean ALOT longer than I ever wanted to and that means as my family grows we'll be more cramped! It would probably be easier for me NOT to fight for it.. move on and start the clock ticking NOW on the time that I CAN'T buy mty next home.. so as for you theory about me wanting to make a killing.. my actions, my fight speak to the complete opposite of that!

[Beena]

"I had no idea I was taking a gamble.. it wasn't explained to me that way.. it didn't appear to me to be a risk!! NOT AT ALL!!!"

Well from here going forward, please understand this. Real Estate is a risk. As is every investment. I lost a total of 90k on my last house and wrote a check at close. Who told you that you were not taking a risk?