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Old 01-27-2012, 12:04 PM
 
Location: Austin
2,173 posts, read 2,764,342 times
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Well, it's got to be Danny Glover in Silverado-

"I don't want to kill you. And you don't want to be dead."

Course, it may be awesome just becasue it's from Silverado...
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Old 01-27-2012, 12:13 PM
 
Location: Wherever women are
19,022 posts, read 24,692,098 times
Reputation: 11309
Saw Machete recently and I don't remember having laughed so much in a long time. Too many punch lines to type.

Then the other guys. Even better.

"I think you're a fake cop. The sound of you when you **** hits the urinal. It sounds feminine. If I were a lion and you were a tuna, I would come out of my food chain and fricking eat you. And then, I'll bang your tuna girlfriend"

And then:
"Who's baby is that? Who's the man who did that to you? Gator's ******* better be using Jimmie's"
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Old 01-27-2012, 01:14 PM
 
Location: Atlanta, GA
696 posts, read 1,084,152 times
Reputation: 584
My favorite line from Machete - "We did not cross the border, the border crossed us." [Jessica Alba's character]


Quote:
Originally Posted by Antlered Chamataka View Post
Saw Machete recently and I don't remember having laughed so much in a long time. Too many punch lines to type.

Then the other guys. Even better.

"I think you're a fake cop. The sound of you when you **** hits the urinal. It sounds feminine. If I were a lion and you were a tuna, I would come out of my food chain and fricking eat you. And then, I'll bang your tuna girlfriend"

And then:
"Who's baby is that? Who's the man who did that to you? Gator's ******* better be using Jimmie's"
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Old 01-27-2012, 09:00 PM
 
Location: Wherever women are
19,022 posts, read 24,692,098 times
Reputation: 11309
Quote:
Originally Posted by ronyusa View Post
My favorite line from Machete - "We did not cross the border, the border crossed us." [Jessica Alba's character]
Dude, seriously, the movie is loaded with humour, literally littered all over in between the so-called serious action flick.

Right after she gives that speech, Segal comes along.

Segal: You're Machete's girl?
Alba: How do you know?
Segal: You are his type.
Alba: What type?
Segal: Dead!

One of the funniest scenes is where De Niro forgets his walking stick and his stooge goes like, "You forgot your stick, Sir". "Milk it" LMAO hahahaha

That confession is awesome too.
"I wish that April sees me as a REAL man".

I loved that Mexican actor who plays the priest:
"I absolve you of all the sins, now get the f*** out" <says it with a sign of the cross>
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