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McMansions are not exclusive to NJ! Where are you coming from?
It's when they build whole neighborhoods of oversized houses with pretentious features so you aren't supposed to notice that they are just extra-large boxes.
Have you ever watched the Showtime series "Weeds"? I think the opening credits are a pretty good example of a McMansion neighborhood (in CA in that case) and I love the theme song.
You know what? I don't think "acquaintances" is the best you can hope for...... I have had that belief too.
A very weird thing happens over time.... these acquaintances truly, truly evolve into friends. I have seen it time and time again. There is something about the familiarity of people that you see over and over again and after a while, they see you and you see them as part of the same "fabric".
I remember twelve years ago, sitting down to dinner with a bunch of "acquaintances" that I knew I'd never, ever have anything in common with..... Well, here it is over a decade later, and some are dear friends and it happened by osmosis. A combo of seeing each other change and time....
I have a friend in her 60s who retired to PA and never expected to make friends there either--said she hated all etc. Well, 13 years later, the little boy across the street calls her "grandma". TRUST ME--she did not see that coming and it's not as though they break bread together every Sunday either. It's just that 13 years of watching the kid across the street morph from toddler, to training wheels, to bikes etc made them feel affectionate towards the kid.....and vice versa. To him, "he's known them his whole life".... It's very funny when i visit now this place they were forced to move to when they were laid off and which they now fondly call home.
Sometimes I think I am going to write a book about moving because I have experienced it so much and know I have a different perspective as a result.
One other phenomenon I have noticed: you change according to the group around you. In one town, you can be "the funny one", in another "colorful" and in a third "weird." In one town, tutoring your three year old is crazy; across the country not tutoring your three year old is equally "crazy." I have found it very liberating to realize that there is "no right or wrong" on many things but rather a different perspective and it has allowed me to make my own choices time and time again.
Interesting--I guess I'll find out!
There is a difference, though, in moving somewhere completely and utterly alone and moving somewhere with a family or even just a spouse in tow. This is the first time I've lived alone, and I upgraded my AAA membership when I realized one day that if my car broke down, there is not a soul I could call to come help me or give me a ride home (I also have a couple of taxi company numbers in my cell phone for the same reason.)
Right now, I have something called a frozen shoulder. I had it in the other shoulder two years ago--you lose range of motion, and you have to work it out slowly by doing exercises. The outdoor light by my front door is burnt out, but because you can't just twist the bulb in and out--you need one hand to hold the socket steady and one to turn the bulb--I cannot change my lightbulb because I can't lift one arm high enough to reach into the fixture and hold the socket still. I can't exactly ask someone I don't know or hardly know to help me change a lightbulb, so I am just going without an outdoor light by my door.
It's these dumb little things that I've found create the most trouble when you move somewhere alone and don't know anyone. My daughter came home from school in Asia last week and was with me for two days before she had to go back to college upstate and I forgot to get her to change that dang bulb for me! If she comes home for a weekend or anything I'll get her to do it.
There is a difference, though, in moving somewhere completely and utterly alone and moving somewhere with a family or even just a spouse in tow. This is the first time I've lived alone, and I upgraded my AAA membership when I realized one day that if my car broke down, there is not a soul I could call to come help me or give me a ride home (I also have a couple of taxi company numbers in my cell phone for the same reason.)
Right now, I have something called a frozen shoulder. I had it in the other shoulder two years ago--you lose range of motion, and you have to work it out slowly by doing exercises. The outdoor light by my front door is burnt out, but because you can't just twist the bulb in and out--you need one hand to hold the socket steady and one to turn the bulb--I cannot change my lightbulb because I can't lift one arm high enough to reach into the fixture and hold the socket still. I can't exactly ask someone I don't know or hardly know to help me change a lightbulb, so I am just going without an outdoor light by my door.
It's these dumb little things that I've found create the most trouble when you move somewhere alone and don't know anyone. My daughter came home from school in Asia last week and was with me for two days before she had to go back to college upstate and I forgot to get her to change that dang bulb for me! If she comes home for a weekend or anything I'll get her to do it.
Yes--that is much harder to live alone. It really is..... I am sorry you are having to go through that adjustment on your own..... In time, I am sure you will start to make friends but I do think you are right, it is harder.
Yes--that is much harder to live alone. It really is..... I am sorry you are having to go through that adjustment on your own..... In time, I am sure you will start to make friends but I do think you are right, it is harder.
Yes, I think so, too. I'd be embarrassed to ask someone for help for something that a person should be able to do for herself. It would put the other person in a spot because then they would feel obligated to help even if they didn't want to.
I do know my immediate neighbors--I live in a condo complex--but I'm certainly not going to ask any of them to change my lightbulb for me!
No, I didn't say them "as if they were" either bad or good. I simply mentioned that this is why some people might not want to move to the suggested states. What one reads into my statement is entirely from their own POV!
I'll be more blunt than some other posters:...hide behind your "friend" to make your snarky comments.
HalfFull, my friend, you are wrong! Those are not my issues. Whenever he communicates with me, I help him post those thoughts out. With warm regards.
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