I agree that downtown NB, Highland Park, and Piscataway are all decent options. There are some very nice high end apts in downtown NB which will have the in unit W/D, but come at a fairly high rental rate. I also have some reservations as there are safety issues in the area. HP is very safe, and as mentioned, you are walking distance to downtown NB for all the nightlife, but it is much quieter and sane. (no all night keggers on a tuesday night, or cleaning up vomit every week from your sidewalk/driveway as you'd find in downtown NB) Tons of grad students as well a medical students from UNDMJ live in HP. If you live on the other side of HP, further away from NB you are closer to Piscataway as well as the train station in Edison. There are a number of luxury apt complexes in Piscataway, so you'll find your in unit w/d and granite counters, etc. yet you'll be only a short drive or cab ride to NB nightlife. As far as shopping the Shop Rite on Rte 1 in Edison is really nice, and only a short drive (10/12 min) from downtown NB, HP or Piscataway. A little further away but still convenient is a Wegmans in Woodbridge (~20 min)
HTH
KoalaNJ