Is leaving the right thing to do? (mortgage, credit)

[BobKovacs]

Originally Posted by nic529

so I should move to the ghetto and get a house for 200,000 - because thats where the lower taxes are - or I should rent an apartment or something only for the government to crucify my paycheck. Be realistic at least. And basically what your saying is - If you live in NJ you and have a financially difficult period you'll have to move? LOL absurd!

So what is the answer then? If you live in NJ and have a financially difficult period, what's supposed to happen? Should the government jump in and save you? Should the mortgage company waive your payments until you get things back in order? Should your neighbors all pitch in to pay your bills?

Does having a financially difficult period mean you have to move? Not necessarily, but it should at least prompt you to think about your situation and work to set yourself up so you don't get crippled if another issue comes along. This may mean working a second job to pay off some debt or to allow you to start saving some money for a future crisis. It may mean moving to a smaller house. It may mean moving to another area where costs are lower but work is more secure. Only you can decide what the right answer is, but it certainly sounds like something has to change.

[nic529]

Originally Posted by BobKovacs

So what is the answer then? If you live in NJ and have a financially difficult period, what's supposed to happen? Should the government jump in and save you? Should the mortgage company waive your payments until you get things back in order? Should your neighbors all pitch in to pay your bills?

Does having a financially difficult period mean you have to move? Not necessarily, but it should at least prompt you to think about your situation and work to set yourself up so you don't get crippled if another issue comes along. This may mean working a second job to pay off some debt or to allow you to start saving some money for a future crisis. It may mean moving to a smaller house. It may mean moving to another area where costs are lower but work is more secure. Only you can decide what the right answer is, but it certainly sounds like something has to change.

Moving to another house is not an option! OMG! All I'm saying is we're thinking about it! Is there something so wrong with that? I don't think anyone should save me and I never eluded to that either. Tough times happen to everyone - mostly - anyway - and I'm sure we'll be fine in time - but what exactly is it that is so wrong questioning leaving a state with corrupt politicians and a high cost of living? My goodness - its just a question.

[stevemorse]

I think there are alot of people in the same situation as you Nic. Look some people have moved South, and have done better and are thrilled. Read NC board, ask questions, go visit the State, go for vacation and research!! You said you have family and friends down South, so stay with them, and look for housing, employment, and so on. Some people from what I read are thrilled, my moving experience is quite funny read the post called MY SAGA, you will laugh and feel better about your situation. It got so bad here , my husband one day and mind you it was only 4 months he lasted and he said to me, I am thinking of bringing in the BBQ grill to kill myself!!!!!! So don't think I am not for a move if its done right, not like my husband who was living in a retirement fantasy.

Maybe you will love it. Renting is not the answer , I can say that. I have a freind who sold his house 3 weeks ago, could not afford Westwood, NJ, now he is paying 1600 a month plus utilities to keep his 2 kids in Westwood school system. His mortage was only 2000 a month. Whats the point he had 12 years into the house and could have done better if he just stuck it out .

Look and research down South, and fill us in!!!!! Marilyn

At least you got everyone here thinking about this initial post. Believe me you are not alone, now go do your research, and post on the NC board find all the employment tools you both need to make it work. I think maybe its worth a good shot if you really want out of this. I said not to move because of my experience but it was quite different than yours. Go and look what have you got to lose???

[ScranBarre]

Originally Posted by nic529

Moving to another house is not an option! OMG! All I'm saying is we're thinking about it! Is there something so wrong with that? I don't think anyone should save me and I never eluded to that either. Tough times happen to everyone - mostly - anyway - and I'm sure we'll be fine in time - but what exactly is it that is so wrong questioning leaving a state with corrupt politicians and a high cost of living? My goodness - its just a question.

Not to rain on your parade, but I hope you realize that political corruption is EVERYWHERE; it knows no boundaries. Here in Wilkes-Barre, PA the latest scandal is that seven county officials grossly misused county-issued debit cards, some of whom even made charges on the taxpayers' tab at strip clubs in Las Vegas. People are storming the courthouse, waving protest signs, and demanding resignations. I honestly don't blame them. I don't know why you folks in NJ like to express such a victimized mentality all the time when idiotic politicians are EVERYWHERE; your state didn't corner the market on corruption. If you think palms aren't greased in those "wholesome" little suburban cul-de-sac-villes in NC as well, then you're sadly mistaken. You're never going to escape dirty politics. As an aspiring politician myself in a few years (Scranton city council member), I live, drink, eat, breathe, and sleep political research so I can find ways to better serve my future constituents. Doing so has opened my eyes that far too many people in this nation let power go to their heads (cough...Bush...cough).

[nic529]

of course I know its everywhere - hope you can make that difference someday

[njguy]

Life isn't perfect and if you want it to be more affordable something has to give one way or another unless you come into some found money (lets share ). It's a tradeoff and unfortunately not many can have it all as well as everything going perfectly to ones wants and needs. I for one don't earn even half your income and have been deciding what's the next step as even apartment rentals in my case can come close to redlining my paycheck and after bare necessities.

Think long and hard about ALL aspects of your situation and I'm sure you'll come to a conclusion that'll make sense for you.

[tahiti]

Originally Posted by nic529

yes, tahiti - we are simply finding that it should not be this difficult to recover after a hard period. and given the salaries we bring in we find that if the taxes hadn't gotten so high so fast we wouldnt be finding it so difficult to recover. we are not putting our house on the market tomorrow....we don't even know if we'll move! we are not in the habit of making poor and irrational decisions. We are not going to move with out having money for down payment or jobs....we will make the best decisions we possibly can. Maybe all my research will reveal that moving is not in the best interest of my family - I don't know yet. What I do know - is that my taxes have risen at a fast rate and I'm sure they won't be going down any time soon. I know that A LOT of fellow New Jerseyans have left for the same reasons I am now questioning. I'm not simply jumping on the band wagon....I'm asking - I'm researching - If I do go - I'm sure it won't be for a while.

it's only been a few months. i don't know how long this unemployment stint was, but if it ended in the summer, it's only been what? 4, 5 months? these things take time, and if you move without taking care of it (the debt, your credit), it's just going to follow you wherever you go.

work on paying down the debts and getting your credit score in order, then revisit the move. you may find at that time you're doing well and don't want to relocate. and if you decide to leave, you'll have your affairs in order, maybe the market will have bounced back a bit, and you'll be in a much better financial place.

[nic529]

Originally Posted by stevemorse

I think there are alot of people in the same situation as you Nic. Look some people have moved South, and have done better and are thrilled. Read NC board, ask questions, go visit the State, go for vacation and research!! You said you have family and friends down South, so stay with them, and look for housing, employment, and so on. Some people from what I read are thrilled, my moving experience is quite funny read the post called MY SAGA, you will laugh and feel better about your situation. It got so bad here , my husband one day and mind you it was only 4 months he lasted and he said to me, I am thinking of bringing in the BBQ grill to kill myself!!!!!! So don't think I am not for a move if its done right, not like my husband who was living in a retirement fantasy.

Maybe you will love it. Renting is not the answer , I can say that. I have a freind who sold his house 3 weeks ago, could not afford Westwood, NJ, now he is paying 1600 a month plus utilities to keep his 2 kids in Westwood school system. His mortage was only 2000 a month. Whats the point he had 12 years into the house and could have done better if he just stuck it out .

Look and research down South, and fill us in!!!!! Marilyn

At least you got everyone here thinking about this initial post. Believe me you are not alone, now go do your research, and post on the NC board find all the employment tools you both need to make it work. I think maybe its worth a good shot if you really want out of this. I said not to move because of my experience but it was quite different than yours. Go and look what have you got to lose???

Oh no! The barbecue grill! LOL I'll have to go read that post - sounds good. Thanks for the advice Marilyn. We know it may not be better, just looking around!

[billb7581]

What seems to happen is, a formerly sparse area gets to be trendy and everyone moves there. Then they need to upgrade the school, sewage plant, and infrastructure in town all at once, so the taxes skyrocket. Once all that's done, they're not going to lower them, they just look for new things to blow the money on.

[nic529]

Originally Posted by tahiti

it's only been a few months. i don't know how long this unemployment stint was, but if it ended in the summer, it's only been what? 4, 5 months? these things take time, and if you move without taking care of it (the debt, your credit), it's just going to follow you wherever you go.

work on paying down the debts and getting your credit score in order, then revisit the move. you may find at that time you're doing well and don't want to relocate. and if you decide to leave, you'll have your affairs in order, maybe the market will have bounced back a bit, and you'll be in a much better financial place.

Thats the plan! Thanks!