Bankruptcy in NJ (Browns Mills: house, live, move to)

[CuCullin]

Originally Posted by EEEPNJ

Sweetheart, If I could get a/c and indoor plumbing, I'm ready to be AMISH.

The amish aren't the people you think, I wouldn't wish that life on anyone... and I'm being serious.

[wileynj]

Originally Posted by EEEPNJ

Wiley - I feel like your my long lost sister! LOL!

NOTHING is worth your life...that's what I was thinking. It is AWFULLY hard to go backwards. But I have to tell you - I grew up poor. When I was in my teens I was in school and working 2 jobs to help out my Mom. (My parents divorced and my father was mia - which was really for the best anyway.) We started doing a little better then. I went to college, got an apartment w/ BF (now Husband) and we started off with NOTHING. We saved, got a nicer apt, got a condo, got a house... b4 he left his last job we were making GOOD $ combined... and let me tell you what a joke it is ... when you HAVE $ there are so many things people GIVE to you for free. When I was a poor kid in JC I had no chance in hell of seeing a Broadway Play or getting front row seat to a Yankee game... then we could afford them, but chose not to spend our $ that way - and damn, we didn't HAVE too! Every day would be "So and so gave me 2 tickets to Wicked." "Oh, a vendor dropped of tickets for the big game..." Rediculous... now that we're not doing as well at the moment, that's all done. LOL Gotta love it.

But the irony is I was actually happiest at 2 points in my life, growing up in JC with my Mom, Sister, Grandparents and Uncle and a lovely little community where everyone really CARED for one another - even if we were not rich. And then when my husaband & I were just starting out, when we broke free of the poverty cycle but were still far from "well off" but we moved out of the City, had a nice place, decent cars (I'm talking Civics here...no fancy stuff) and we were just so happy. The more we got the more stress came along with it. When we bought our home I was miserable. It wise nice, it was in Bergen County - I was signing the mortgage thinkging "We're going to have to kill ourselves to maintain it."

I'm at the point where I'd like to sell and get a condo... I am waiting for conto prices to tank a little more though. I swear, I'd be happier.

well my dad did get around in his younger days . I come from an Irish Catholic background...8 of us..my dad came from 11? or 14? lose track after the 5th kid I guess... He was born into money and lots of it but his parents eventually lost it all during the depression. My mother's parents owned a diner in Hackensack. We learned at a very young age what hard work was... my parents had restaurants and we started working in the kitchen at age 13! College? What's that??? Needless to say, I've had to work very hard for what I have now and losing it will be sad but I know how to survive if need be. If business doesn't pick up soon, I'll be right there with your hubby searching for a job. Downside is...no college degree for me. So I'll probably have to work 2 jobs and my partner 2 jobs as well in order to get through this economic mess. Worst case scenario...we sell our place in NJ and move to Scotland as we have a house over there as well. I'm sure I'll learn to love haggis, tatties and nips .

[country heart]

Hi,
I may be answering a little late but I would tell you to contact a bankrupcy lawyer. My husband declared personal bandrupcy and we were able to keep our home despite the fact I too was very sick at the time and went from a 50/hr job in NJ to almost nothing. My husband landed up having a stroke. We couldn't even pay taxes. The lawyers helped us a lot. We have a loan out for almost half of the equity in our home, paid off the bills and will be selling and moving to the Carollinas. I hope you get the chance to check out the places and see that the living and the people are friendly. If anyone can suggest a area that is affordable and has good medical care surrounding it that would help. Also the job market even for your wife let's say receptionist would be helpful. I am not putting anyone down. I just know sometimes the job you had can't be the job you can do any longer
Good Luck

[EEEPNJ]

Originally Posted by CuCullin

The amish aren't the people you think, I wouldn't wish that life on anyone... and I'm being serious.

Depends on the sect of the Amish. Actually, my daughter has an Amish pen pal... we met her on a trip to PA. And they are among the lovliest people I have ever met.

[EEEPNJ]

Originally Posted by wileynj

well my dad did get around in his younger days . I come from an Irish Catholic background...8 of us..my dad came from 11? or 14? lose track after the 5th kid I guess... He was born into money and lots of it but his parents eventually lost it all during the depression. My mother's parents owned a diner in Hackensack. We learned at a very young age what hard work was... my parents had restaurants and we started working in the kitchen at age 13! College? What's that??? Needless to say, I've had to work very hard for what I have now and losing it will be sad but I know how to survive if need be. If business doesn't pick up soon, I'll be right there with your hubby searching for a job. Downside is...no college degree for me. So I'll probably have to work 2 jobs and my partner 2 jobs as well in order to get through this economic mess. Worst case scenario...we sell our place in NJ and move to Scotland as we have a house over there as well. I'm sure I'll learn to love haggis, tatties and nips .

Which Diner?

Scotland sounds great, I'm trying to get my friend to take us back to Denmark with him!

It is tough!

[EEEPNJ]

Originally Posted by country heart

Hi,
I may be answering a little late but I would tell you to contact a bankrupcy lawyer. My husband declared personal bandrupcy and we were able to keep our home despite the fact I too was very sick at the time and went from a 50/hr job in NJ to almost nothing. My husband landed up having a stroke. We couldn't even pay taxes. The lawyers helped us a lot. We have a loan out for almost half of the equity in our home, paid off the bills and will be selling and moving to the Carollinas. I hope you get the chance to check out the places and see that the living and the people are friendly. If anyone can suggest a area that is affordable and has good medical care surrounding it that would help. Also the job market even for your wife let's say receptionist would be helpful. I am not putting anyone down. I just know sometimes the job you had can't be the job you can do any longer
Good Luck

Excellent advice Country Heart - glad to see you and your husband came out of that mess all right!

[wileynj]

Originally Posted by EEEPNJ

Which Diner?

Scotland sounds great, I'm trying to get my friend to take us back to Denmark with him!

It is tough!

I'll have to ask dad as mom is past now. Was way before I was born : )
Scotland is beautiful..the house is just outsdie of Edinburgh. Town Home but it'll do if need be .

I liked Denmark - thing was, they don't much care for Americans over there and it was damn expensive!

[CuCullin]

Originally Posted by EEEPNJ

Depends on the sect of the Amish. Actually, my daughter has an Amish pen pal... we met her on a trip to PA. And they are among the lovliest people I have ever met.

True, its mostly the ones out west that are the worst. To me, though, any fundamentalist group, large or small, fits into the same category. I definitely appreciate some of the incredible innovations that have come from the Amish, but there are many sects which worry the crap out of me.

[Alex07860]

Originally Posted by CuCullin

True, its mostly the ones out west that are the worst. To me, though, any fundamentalist group, large or small, fits into the same category. I definitely appreciate some of the incredible innovations that have come from the Amish, but there are many sects which worry the crap out of me.

they're up there w/ Al-Qaeda I tell ya.

[EEEPNJ]

Originally Posted by CuCullin

True, its mostly the ones out west that are the worst. To me, though, any fundamentalist group, large or small, fits into the same category. I definitely appreciate some of the incredible innovations that have come from the Amish, but there are many sects which worry the crap out of me.

There is a great book "Amish Grace" written after the Nickel Mines tragedy - it is really inspirational and had a great impact on my life.

I do understand where you are coming from. Obviously, the family that we know is more liberal or they would not have communication with us. But they are so simple and just focus on the most important things in life, I really find them inspirational. It's a very different way of life.