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Hi All
I'm A New Jerseyan Leaving The State For Better Living And Cheaper
Cost Of Housing.born And Bred Here Even Thou My Parents Are Southern,who Did The Reverse Back In The 50/40's To Come To Nj.
It's Sad To Say You Have To Go Some Where Else Just To Be More Comfortable And Have More Money In Your Pocket.even If You Make A Good Dollar It Doesn't Go Very Far In Nj.living Pay Check To Pay Is
Not Something I Want To Start Doing,while Were Pinching To Save What Can Be Saved It's Time To Leave Before Theres Nothing Left To Pinch Or Save.nj Is Just Coruped And The Middle Class Harding Working People Are Paying The Almighty Price$$$$$.
Hi All
I'm A New Jerseyan Leaving The State For Better Living And Cheaper
Cost Of Housing.born And Bred Here Even Thou My Parents Are Southern,who Did The Reverse Back In The 50/40's To Come To Nj.
It's Sad To Say You Have To Go Some Where Else Just To Be More Comfortable And Have More Money In Your Pocket.even If You Make A Good Dollar It Doesn't Go Very Far In Nj.living Pay Check To Pay Is
Not Something I Want To Start Doing,while Were Pinching To Save What Can Be Saved It's Time To Leave Before Theres Nothing Left To Pinch Or Save.nj Is Just Coruped And The Middle Class Harding Working People Are Paying The Almighty Price$$$$$.
I appreciate everyone's viewpoint here. But I think Quarterback comes closest to my own feelings. We simply can't afford to stay here. Living paycheck to paycheck (and we don't even have any luxuries to speak of) makes life so uncertain. We have not had a vacation in over 10 years. Houses $300,000 or more? No thanks....
My husband and I are split over this. I would stay here IF we could afford it. But that's only because my mother and brother are in NJ. No friends to leave behind, really. I will miss them and my nieces A LOT. As for friends, every single one of them has died in the last 12 years. There are memories everywhere for me, both happy and painful. But in the end, we must look to our own future. If our relatives want us to stay here, then let them cough up the extra cash and I'll be glad to.
But my hubby is on rotten terms with his family and wants to get away from them. Especially since his father passed away 3 years ago and his sister stole my husband's portion of his inheritance. If that hadn't of happened, we could easily remain.
Another thing that we must grapple with is something I mentioned before--NJ is not the same place it was. Most of what I enjoyed is now just a memory; the places physically do not exist in the same state they were when the "good times" were experienced.
I'll miss going to Philly (haven't been to NYC in over 25 years). Funny thing, we have Atlantic City about a 1/2 hour from us and haven't gone there in 6 years. But the idea that we could if we wanted to is certainly an enticing one and the ability to do so will not remain when we leave. A 400+ mile drive to come back will turn into a grueling trip
To summarize, NJ has forced our hand. Don't like to think about the depression that's bound to come. But I must remind myself how hard it is for us right now just staying here. Haven't read any books on this, but I'm sure they mention that people tend to remember the good times and repress the bad when they look back at places they have left behind. Same with people--we tend to remember their good points and ignore their bad and forget the reasons why we had to part.
We left South Dakota to come back to NJ. I can remember crossing over the border into Iowa and looking back. Something in my heart was saying "don't leave, turn around and go back". Right now I realize that I should have listened to my inner voice. But I don't want to go back down that road of regrets again.
I agree with you. When it comes down to dollars and cents, NJ is just too expensive. A one bedroom apartment in Central NJ is no less than $900/mo and a home there is well out of our price range. If we do decide to go back to NJ, we need to be prepared to re-shuffle our finances again. I wish it weren't so complex. I wish you well with your move. Yes, depression will most likely come as well as the "did we/didn't we do the right thing" internal conflict that never seems to go away. In the end, you need to do what's right for you. As many good times and memories I had in NJ, the harsh reality is that memories don't pay the bills. I miss people and things and always will until (if) I go back again. I wish NJ would just clean up so it wouldn't be so difficult emotionally to stay away. This is one of the hardest, most painful decision of my life.
I would come back to Jersey but North Jersey. The central part of Jersey is very crowded now. I like being up near the mountains in the northern part of the state.
I would NEVER have left North Jersey if things were exactly the way they were 40 years ago.
Where I am now in PA it is almost exactly the way things were 40 years ago minus the quality diverse restaurants and bakeries. I take a 1.5 Hr. ride back to NJ every 6-8 weeks to stock up my freezer, visit a favorite restaurant and then make a beeline back to sanity.
I left NJ because of a family commitment, moving to Fl. I wanted to return to NJ after 6 months, both myself and husband plus kids hated it, why couldn't
we move, every time we put house up for sale, you could build cheaper back than than buy a second-hand house. Here in Fl. now 20 yrs and finally after
the kids are all grown, I want out. But NJ is sooooo expensive, can't make that move. I lived in North West NJ.........beautiful mountains, small town
lots of lake communities, now those house that were $16,000 in 1970 are going for $300,000 and the taxes are over $3,000 and getting no town services other than fire/police. I go back every year and the town has nearly stayed the same, except for something called Main Street. My friends
are still there as is family. I will be buried in my town when my turn comes
would not want to be any place else.
Even if I had returned I think eventually I would have had to leave or be forced out because of taxes. Maybe by staying in FL I saved myself some grief. You can take the girl out of NJ but you can't take NJ out of her heart
I moved to Charleston, SC 4 years ago and love it! I wouldn't move back at all, the quality of life by the beach with far less financial stress is totally worth it...plus the year round warm weather and friendly people, it's great!
Very interesting thread and peoples opinions on life and coming and going to NJ!
I'm curious to know first is there a difference between N.Jersey and S.Jersey and is one place better than the other as far as quality of live?
Many posters here are from N.Jersey or lived or have lived there.
The reference is always to NYC specifically Manhattan and how much they miss it or like it. Lets face it NYC is a place to its own with a strong identity throughout the world. I grew up 30 min from Philly. Ok...yeah it has great sports team, food, culture, history but it is no NYC. NYC has "Broadway" and PHL has "Broad Street". Having traveled to more than 50 countries and 40 US states, people long to hear about NYC not Philly..just the way it is.
I left S.Jersey to attend college in Arizona in the early 80's and have lived in California pretty much since graduation with a 3yr stint back in S.Jersey from 87-90. I've lived in San Francisco for 14yrs and now LA for a little over 2yrs.
I realize now that 14yrs in SF in my early adult yrs has framed my like and dislikes and comparisons against other places. NJ are my memories from youth. I think I have the Jersey sense of humor and expressions and sometimes the no "BS" attitude but I do it with a smile and easy going laid back attitude, ala "West Coast" influence. Last week on a visit to SF a good friend looked at me and said, "you might have been raised in NJ, but your really a Bay Area kind of guy". I think she is right.
I have friends on many income levels. Most middle class but some very wealthy as well. The wealthy ones are never comparing against other places, they are were they are because they want to be and can afford to be. So is it cost of living (taxes, home prices in N.Jersey) that drive people away from NJ, seems like it mostly or ya just don't like Jersey?
I often think about moving back East (NJ, Washington DC,Jersey, Boston) because I miss the everyday folk one encounters, the seasons, etc), probably better need to just get out of LA! Then again I would probably miss the life style that I have so well adjusted too on the West Coast and I visit "Joysey" about 3 times a yr.
There is a famous line, can't remember the author, "Comparing is the heart of all discontent". I always remember that.
Last edited by friendlyflyer; 05-19-2007 at 03:21 PM..
In the final analysis, at least for me, it is not a question of leaving and/or coming back to New Jersey. I love NJ, with all my heart. But it is not what it used to be. The property taxes are killing the middle class, and destroying the dream of home ownership.
Ditto for the small businessman. I spoke to the owner of the feed and garden store that I patronize, and he told me NJ is destroying the business he has and is working so hard for. Property taxes: $18,000 per year. Liability insurance: $85,000 health insurance: $72,000. At the end of the tax year, what he has gained from all the toil doesn't come near to providing a decent way of life anymore.
IF we had enough money, we would probably go into the Northern part of the state, as another poster mentioned. Who knows? If our fortune changes in our new state, we might return.
But for now, it's not so much I'm leaving New Jersey. New Jersey has left me.
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Thanks for all the Replies!
