Where to go if we don't like Ridgewood? (Montclair, Maplewood: neighborhood, to buy)

[Hal Jalikeakick]

I'd give it more time if I were you. Ridgewood is a great place in my opinion; I spent the first 21 years of my life there. There were snobs then too, but overall I think the postitives very much outweigh the negatives in the town. I still know a lot of very down to earth good people who live there.

Most affluent towns are going to have a certain snob factor, and any highly ranked school system is going to have a certain element of overly competitive people.
I think overall that regardless of where you live these days, kids are over- scheduled, and pushed too hard too soon. I don't think this problem is limited to Ridgewoood. Seems like being a kid these days aint as much fun as it used to be.

[EEEPNJ]

I know EXACTLY what you are speaking of though. I bought in a more affordable town (without a great school system) knowing I'd put my kids in private school. The first school they were in was SO over the top academic that my youngest was already hating school in FIRST grade. So I took them out and put them in another private school (not too far from you - if you are interested I'll DM you the school) and there is such a balance there. They are learning, but they are having fun and allowed to be kids too.

I have definitely heard the same complaint from other parents in Ridgewood, as well as some other areas. I will be honest, if you look at any of the top 25-50 schools in NJ, most will be that way (to varying degrees.) The best schools are in the most expensive towns and the snob factor tends to be there.

The problem in Bergen, particularly Northern Bergen, is even the towns that used to be middle class became "well to do" towns during the recent housing boom. But there is still better and worse. Ridgewood is lovely, IMO, but it's not called Richwood for nothing either. I think towns that may be better suited would be Midland Park, Waldwick, Washington Township, Westwood, Oakland, perhaps Mahwah, River Edge, Paramus, and if you want to go to Southern Bergen I'd reccommend Hasbrouck Heights and Ruterford. If you want to look out of Bergen County, I can get some other suggestions for you. GOOD LUCK.

[stevemorse]

Hold tight I got the perfect town, this is no way near as cut throat, yes its fancy, yes it has a down town but majority of the people are really great and I think its a great option, WYCKOFF!!!!!!! Tenafly is mostly Jewish, so if you are that religion I would consider but if not, no way. I would go to WYCKOFF!!! Drive around your practically next door but a lot less over the top. The difference is these people are rich but not as in your face. Its a nice town, a very waspy feel, sort like MA!! I think you may be suprised!

[akitasun]

I also heard Wycoff was a really nice town with a good school district. No Train to speak of so the commute will be alittle worse to NYC compared to Ridgewood.

Someone mentioned Tenafly as a good alternative. I nkow people from that town and they seem to be more down to earth and when I visited the town it seems quaint. But one thing to remember is that this school district ranked #3 in NJ Monthly and is higly competive as well, just like most of the top 30 high schools in Long Island.

I think just as many wrote previously that in the better school districts in general you will get a snob factor a the competitve envionment concerning school and sports, but it seems that everytime you hear Ridgewood, some always has to mention that, so their must be some truth to it. Just my opinion.

If you don't need to be near train and would like to stay in bergen i suggest the following towns, mind you snobs and competive people are everywhere.

-Hillsdale
-Wycoff
-Closter
-River Vale
-West Wood

If you can go to another county check out
-New Providence. I have only heard good things about this town. It has a very small downtown but is next to Summit so if you need to go out its just 5 minutes away. It does have a train station as well. I am also considering this town as well.

[akitasun]

Correction I meant top 30 schools in Bergen County not Long Island

[EEEPNJ]

Hillsdale and Westwood have trains, so it may work commute wise as well.

Summit may not be bad either, good schools, and not cheap by any means, but it is a more divers school system and there are kids that have and have not.

I don't know New Providence, but I do know Chatham and Berkeley Heights... you will have the snob and competitiveness factor there as much as you will in Ridgewood, if not more.

[akitasun]

Correction the following towns have trains
-Hillsdale
-West Wood

[magggmom]

Thank you all for the input- you've given me some good options. And thank you EEEPNJ- every once in a while I think it's just me. Then I bump into people who refer to Ridgewood as a snake pit! It definitely has its pros, but if sending your kid to Harvard isn't at the top of your priorities it can be a a lot to handle.

[NJ Chutzpah]

for a general rule of thumb is this

All the towns north of Rte 4 are moneyed snobs and their entitled punk kids

(jokingly)

It is also more waspy up there as opposed to the more ethnic south of Rte 4

If you do not like ridgewood, you will not like Tenafly

[EEEPNJ]

Over all true, NJ C, but there are some areas North of 4 (Dumont, Bergenfield, New Milford) that are not the snobby upper crust variety towns, but yeah, you'll get more of them up there.

OP - I was talking to my hubby about this last night and he pointed something out to me. He has a good friend who is a surgeon and he and his family grew up in Hudson County. When he got married, he and his wife bought in Closter, NJ...schools were a big reason why. After their eldest child hit 3rd grade, they sold the house and moved to Rutherford, NJ. He said that the snobby and overbearing must get into an ivy at all cost parents is what led to their decision. Their oldest daughter is now in 8th grade, so this was 5 yrs ago. So you are definately not alone.