Where to go if we don't like Ridgewood? (Newark, Paterson: fit in, homes)

[NEWJERSEY1]

A town ain't a good town if it's not diverse, friendly, and doesn't have a downtown area, etc. These are some towns I would highly avoid due to a lack of diversity, friendliness, and downtown: Allendale, Hillsdale, River Vale, and Emerson. All snobby, racist, boring towns.

Try Closter or Dumont. Diverse, decent schools, a beautiful downtown, and people there are very friendly.

Or try to look more down into the county (areas closter to New York City). You can't go wrong with Leonia or Fort Lee ...

[SEG]

We are in the process of transferring from Canada to NJ -- visited Bergen County last summer and, after visiting one town after another, now feel overwhelmed with trying to decide where to house hunt. Ridgewood seemed like a very pretty town, but I have to admit, I'm being scared off by some the posts I'm reading. It sounds a little "intense"... I wonder if backing away to an area like Wyckoff wouldn't be better for us? A middle school will be important to us. Hope to pay around $850,000 for a home. Any recommendations? advice?

[Jerseyt719]

Want good middle schools/schools in general? If you can go further south, try Somerset County. We have a lot of what you're looking for.

[SEG]

husband will be working in Woodcliff Lake and I'd like to take into consideration travelling time for him when house hunting. Not familiar with Somerset County... thanks for replying.

[Jerseyt719]

Somerset County is about 45-1hr from NYC, same, but on the higher end of the time frame to Trenton. I'm not sure where Woodcliff Lake is, but you may want to check it out. We really do have great schools and for the most part of the whole county, it's pretty safe.

[SEG]

I just checked a map and Somerset is too far south... thanks for your comments, though! We'd want to stay in Bergen County, I would think.

[mindfulone]

Hi Magggmom, I have no advice because I live in Morris County but I am having the SAME concerns here! I posted a similar question about Morris County. I guess the only answer is to "settle" for lower rated schools because the high pressure factor is so intense. And then I wonder, does a schools rating, within reason, really matter all that much? I mean schools rated in top 50, or even top 100? I'd be interested in hearing everyone's opinions on this!

[MOM03GIRLS]

On behalf of the Korean parents, I would like to mention that we are doing it for the benefit of our children. Who doesn't want their children to have the best education that we can give them!! And, to point out "sneak peak" at the textbooks is totally bogus. No, teacher will even consider giving a sneak peak at the textbooks.

Originally Posted by EEEPNJ

There can be pressure from within. My friend who moved from Closter said a big problem was that the Korean students parents demanded that they get a "sneak peak" at the textbooks for the next grade a year in advance. Then they'd hire private tutors to teach their kids NEXT years work so they were constatnly ahead of the curve. This would lead to problems with grades too, becuase if their kids were performing AT grade level, but there were a large group of kids in the class that were now performing well above grade level... well, your kids grades are not soo good any more. The choice was do the same and put undue pressure on your kids or vote with your feet. The chose the latter and went to Rutherford and they are much happier now.

A lot of people are reccommending Wyckoff. Funny, and I know this was quite some time ago, but the area has become more, not less, affluent since this time... but remember this case:

SUSPECTS GO HOME N.J. TEENS MONITORED BY DEL. IN BABY SLAY

After this occurred there was so much reporting about how in Wyckoff, the pressure on kids was so high that it was one of the factors that led to this. (Trust me, I don't think it was THE factor, but it may have been A factor.) There were even books written about it and Wyckoff NJ became synonomous with towns that put rediculous pressure on their children to succeed and where parents put too much emphasis on working for the material things for quite some time.

[Busch Boy]

I have a question, would it be possible to live in a town like Ridgewood and avoid the "snobby" people if you want to? Personally, I would just say hi and bye to the people on my street and go to report card night (if I had kids) every marking period; forget PTA meetings. I'd do all my shopping in neighboring towns. Can you get away with that?

[NJ Chutzpah]

^^^

NO you cannot avoid snobs

THEY FIND YOU