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Old 02-04-2009, 06:53 AM
 
Location: Sneads Ferry NC/Randolph NJ/Cape Coral FL
12,937 posts, read 24,071,180 times
Reputation: 10763

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Oh Marilyn, I am so sorry to hear that!! You are in a kind of shock right now and need tosit back , take a deep breath and regroup. You will need to be strong for both Mom & Dad and hopefully there is someone for you to lean on.

Yes, please get a second opinion.. NY & Sloan Kettering are just across the river!!

I'll be keeping you & your Mom in my prayers.
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Old 02-04-2009, 07:09 AM
 
Location: a warmer place
1,747 posts, read 4,825,007 times
Reputation: 756
So sorry to hear. We are all here for you! Hang in there, stay in motion it helps!
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Old 02-04-2009, 07:18 AM
 
Location: Martinsville, NJ
6,159 posts, read 10,900,560 times
Reputation: 3939
That sucks, and I'm sorry to hear it. I think we all wish you & your Mom the best.
As to a second opinion, you don't even need to cross the river. Sloan Kettering opened (two years ago, I think, or maybe less) what is called a State of the Art outpatient center just 30 seconds of Rt. 78 in Basking Ridge. Might be worth looking into.
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Old 02-04-2009, 07:33 AM
 
Location: South Jersey
7,780 posts, read 17,795,892 times
Reputation: 2295
be strong. I will say a few prayers for her. I know how you feel cause I lost my Mom to cancer 15 years ago. She never got to see our Son born. Never will get over it. But time will help. Gotta enjoy every day.
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Old 02-04-2009, 08:09 AM
 
Location: Jersey Shore
3 posts, read 7,161 times
Reputation: 12
I am so sorry to hear about your Mom. I know the feelings you are going through right now as I lost my Dad, 5 years ago today and my Step-Father 7 months ago to cancer. Cancer sucks. Unfortunately, when this happens to one of our parents while the other is still living, it is us that need to be the strong ones. My Mom still cannot function on her own since the death of her husband/best friend; which in effect, did not allow me much time for grieving. I agree with the other posters, do get a second opinion and a third if need be. Your feelings of "will she be gone in 3 months" are totally normal - however, you will be surprised at all the options and new treatments there are today for cancer patients to become cancer survivors and the best thing for you to do right now is to hold on to that Hope and from my experience - be as proactive as you can.

You are in my thoughts. If you need to talk, I am here.

Denyse
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Old 02-04-2009, 08:26 AM
 
Location: NJ
132 posts, read 569,643 times
Reputation: 42
Very sorry. Make sure to stay strong and be positive.
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Old 02-04-2009, 08:40 AM
 
5,617 posts, read 13,397,278 times
Reputation: 2771
thanks all, just spoke with Dad and she got the news. Now they wait around for doctors to tell them how, what , where , when and what to do. This ought to be interesting. Thanks for all the words, yes losing a parent is tough but a part of life for so many. I just hope its not dragged out suffering.

Thanks and believe me I am not the type to keep things in so I will let you know with updates before during and after . Thanks
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Old 02-04-2009, 09:02 AM
 
Location: Redneckville, NJ
6,483 posts, read 9,816,044 times
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I'm sorry to hear this news Marilyn. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts. Best of luck to all of you.
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Old 02-04-2009, 10:13 PM
 
Location: Nashville, TN
2,866 posts, read 8,284,790 times
Reputation: 666
I'm sorry about your Mom. I went thru this with my Mom, 10 years ago. The Colon cancer had spread to her liver before it was discovered Two years of Chemo, and her Quality of life was not good. I was in my 40s then also.
I also lost my MIL to cancer, just before I moved
It was hard to take, but God does not make these things happen, he just allows it to happen.
We just need to live our lives to the Fullest. I pray for you and your mom, and that your days with her will bring happiness to both of you.

Diane G
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Old 02-05-2009, 03:43 AM
 
5,617 posts, read 13,397,278 times
Reputation: 2771
thanks all and I mean it. Lets put it this way, she found out yesterday and it was not a good day!! Things look bad and bleak.
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