What is the Jersey attitude? (2009, live in, gardens)

[luckyshoes]

I don't know about a Jersey attitude, but I love NJ. I've lived in other places, and this is where I want to be. I like it here, I don't want the Southern niceness. I don't understand it and it does come off as phony to me. Now, if people could drive a little easier on the roads, then NJ would be perfect I also love most of the Housewives. They are straight shooters, but good family people.

[tahiti]

jersey attitude? look for it on this board, by people who left the state because of the jersey attitude. you can't run from yourself! lol

[NCN]

I prefer nice to rude even if it is fake. Nice fake is better than unpleasant truthful rude. Makes the day go much better.

Now the nice truth. I would never watch a show called housewives of anything.

[shorebaby]

Originally Posted by NCN

I prefer nice to rude even if it is fake. Nice fake is better than unpleasant truthful rude. Makes the day go much better.

Now the nice truth. I would never watch a show called housewives of anything.

Then stay away from Jersey!

[tallguylehigh]

Living in a Southern State for most of my life and then coming to New Jersey, I would like to think that I can provide some kind of perspective on the "New Jersey attitude."

First off, I find Southerners to be genuinely more friendly than people in New Jersey. It is the little things, but they are there. Granted, people down there may not like you, but rather than putting it in the New Jersey context of "go f*ck yourself," they express their disdain with a much more subtle touch dripping with wit and sarcasm. It is very easy to pick up when someone doesn't like you, if you are sharp enough to pick up on it.

My impression with New Jersey is that they are simply too busy to be bothered, and Lord help you if you impede on their lives when they are busy. The attitude here is very no-nonsense and people are wound a LOT tighter than they are in the South. This "tightness" makes it much easier for a person to "snap" which explains the aggressive reputation people in NJ get. I have never seen so many people willing to fist-fight at the drop of a hat.

Now, there are calm moments and there are kind individuals, in no way am I painting NJ with such a broad brush. People talk in their front yards, when they see each other at the mall but it does not have the same feel as it does in the South. In the South you get the impresion you can talk to ANYONE, not so in NJ, which gets me to my final point.

I find NJ to be very clique-y. Some of this has to do with friend cliques, but the majority of it has to do with family cliques. Never, EVER, have I seen so many large families within close proximity with one another. While some may not think anything of it, I was not raised with this and, again, my impression is I did not see things like this in the South. Get togethers were less upscale and infolved far fewer family. This HUGE family takes up a large amount of one's time. While I enjoy getting together with my wife's "family" I have to chuckle at some of the individuals' connection. It's kind of like the old "I know a guy who went to school with a guy who's mailman's barber..."

Hopefully I was able to shed some like with my thrown together description.

[luckyshoes]

I lived in Dallas and there were major cliques. Sure, they were nice to your face, but it didn't mean anything. I hear you on the big family thing in NJ but all towns are not like that. Some are for sure.

[tommyc_37]

Originally Posted by tallguylehigh

Living in a Southern State for most of my life and then coming to New Jersey, I would like to think that I can provide some kind of perspective on the "New Jersey attitude."

First off, I find Southerners to be genuinely more friendly than people in New Jersey. It is the little things, but they are there. Granted, people down there may not like you, but rather than putting it in the New Jersey context of "go f*ck yourself," they express their disdain with a much more subtle touch dripping with wit and sarcasm. It is very easy to pick up when someone doesn't like you, if you are sharp enough to pick up on it.

My impression with New Jersey is that they are simply too busy to be bothered, and Lord help you if you impede on their lives when they are busy. The attitude here is very no-nonsense and people are wound a LOT tighter than they are in the South. This "tightness" makes it much easier for a person to "snap" which explains the aggressive reputation people in NJ get. I have never seen so many people willing to fist-fight at the drop of a hat.

Now, there are calm moments and there are kind individuals, in no way am I painting NJ with such a broad brush. People talk in their front yards, when they see each other at the mall but it does not have the same feel as it does in the South. In the South you get the impresion you can talk to ANYONE, not so in NJ, which gets me to my final point.

I find NJ to be very clique-y. Some of this has to do with friend cliques, but the majority of it has to do with family cliques. Never, EVER, have I seen so many large families within close proximity with one another. While some may not think anything of it, I was not raised with this and, again, my impression is I did not see things like this in the South. Get togethers were less upscale and infolved far fewer family. This HUGE family takes up a large amount of one's time. While I enjoy getting together with my wife's "family" I have to chuckle at some of the individuals' connection. It's kind of like the old "I know a guy who went to school with a guy who's mailman's barber..."

Hopefully I was able to shed some like with my thrown together description.

I hear you, but this "wound tight" phenomenon is not unique to NJ at all. It also occurs, as much if not more, in NYC and Long Island. What about the Boston area? Very similar, although slightly less than NY/NJ.

[Isilme]

I think in general, people don't think they need manners anymore, but in most instances they can really help (along with a sense of humor). But, if all else fails, speak softly and carry a big stick! : )

[Sassygirl18]

I live in South Jersey and I don't think there's an attitude problem here. I think the "Jersey attitude" maybe referring to the New York attitude which I am sure rubs off on northern New Jersey folks...a kind of abrupt/bordering on rude, inyourface rudeness. I have to say it is very offputting.

[lizzytish]

There definitely is an attitude in northern New Jersey.......arrogant and the hell-with-everyone-else. Don't blame New York. In my opinion both NYC and NY state are better.Corruption is New Jersey is rampant, and the citizens don't seem to care.Of course I've met a few nice, ethical people. Unfortunately, not too many.