I'm outta here NJ!!!! (Newark, Jersey City: mortgage, hotel, trip)

[mbrown29]

I wish you the best of luck, finding the place you want to live....

I personally love NJ and wouldn't move from here. I live in Gloucester County and it isn't fast paced like north Jersey, but I still love it. We have great schools.

P.S. There is nothing wrong with illegal immigrants coming to America and settling here. There are people just like you and me.

Good luck-

[mike0421]

I'd like to offer a little feedback here. I, too, was a lifelong New Jersey resident, and never liked the scenery, or for that matter much else the state had to offer. I lived in New Jersey my entire life until 2 years ago, and have since relocated to Las Cruces New Mexico. I, too, have 2 children. My motivation, however, was more based on finances, plus a desire to be somewhere less congested, with warmer weather. I'd also say the scenery is superior here (for me) relative to most of New Jersey. Now, I'd like to bestow some reality upon your situation at hand. You indicated that you want to relocate somewhere near the water, that is not rural. By virtue of this statement, you are prone to duplicate the conditions that you are currently experiencing, irrespective of your decision. If your justification is to live in an area that at least has better weather, than so be it. However, as others in thread have pointed out, you will be exposed to conditions that you have spoken out against with regard to New Jersey, and the living costs will dwarf even that of Monmouth County. I guess what I am trying to say is you are not going to have a perfect scenario, given your limitations of where you stated you would live, relative to your first post. There are inevitable trade offs and sacrifices. Is Southern California beautiful? To me, yes, undeniably, the coast of California is gorgeous. Would I want to live there? Yes, if money were not an object, and I could walk to my job. Other posters here have also astutely pointed out that you want to live in a quality neighborhood in Southern California. These neighborhoods are even more expensive, unattainable for all but the wealthiest citizens. Towns like Solana Beach, Cardiff by the Sea, Del Mar, Rancho Santa Fe, the ones with the good school systems, are all but a fantasy to all but maybe the top 2/10ths of 1 percent of society. Coastal Northern California, north of Sonoma County, might be an option, but this area is considerably more rural. You are just going to have to readjust your parameters as to where you want to live, or I am afraid you will be severely disappointed. I chose New Mexico, I don't have a beach or water here, (don't really miss it except for seafood) and we don't have all the shopping options here. But the trade off is my mortgage is 1/2 of what it was in New Jersey, and my taxes are 1/10th of what they were. And I get the escape from the winters I so detest back in New Jersey. Is it perfect? No, but you are never going to achieve it, short of winning the lottery. All I have to say is really think it out. I wanted to leave NJ in the worst way, and for the first 2 months I lived here, I could not resolve the difference in culture here, namely, the extreme poverty. A good deal of Southern California is that way too, like New Jersey, there will be a time in the near future where a middle class does not really exist anymore. The difference is, in New Jersey, you can avoid poverty if you want to. In Southern California, and especially where I live, you can't, unless you live in the finest neigborhoods. Poverty will be inescapable unless you have a big budget. You will see neighborhoods the likes of which you are only used to seeing in Perth Amboy, Jersey City, Elizabeth, more of the norm than the exception, in Los Angeles County, and (to a lesser degree) San Diego County. My .02. I hope I am not bursting your bubble, I am just saying, be careful and really think it out. You've got 2 children to consider now.

[anywherebuthere]

tahiti - "WOOSH! That went right over your head. I'm not even going to bother to explain."
- Yes, I was harsh on NJ but not on a particular person. No personal attacks on the people who live here, rather the conditions here. You though, are choosing to personally attack me with your condesending attitude. I think I understood your "anecdotal evidence" comment just fine. It didn't "go over my head", oh holier than thou. All the things I said were general statements, not personal attacks.
Yes, I felt like venting my frustrations on a forum where others might understand. And no, I didn't hold anything back. Of course I expected people to come and reply with their opinions, that's why I am here! But I will not nit-pick every word you write like you are choosing to do with me. If it makes you happy, then go for it. I'm all for you defending Jersey, but don't give me atittude and act like you know more than I do, like the statement above. Rude.
And any rebuttals I had were just me trying to defend how I feel, like when Bob posted his "habla espanol" comment. I don't recall telling anyone they were wrong or what have you.
As far as me posting on the LA forum about the guy bashing it... lol, I knew someone would bring that up! That was what, 7 months ago? I wasn't going to come here and "bash" NJ, but now, at the height of my frustration, I said to hell with it, why not.
I should have just said I am leaving NJ and not brought up CA at all. Because where I am going really has no relevance as to how I feel about NJ. Sorry I attacked your "beloved" NJ, but I stand by what I said.

"A little less emotion, a little more fact, and we can all be friends.".Perhaps you as well should take that comment to heart. But hey, here's a little more emotion for you - Have fun listening to Bruce and eating pork roll from your house with the "scenic view". Obviously, you got in at the right time, or you are comfortable in the monetary sense, one or the other. Oh, and what culture do we have here by the way? Anything you can tell me about, last I checked the only new thing here is a new Wal-Mart LOL. Red Bank is an enjoyable town - I can't think of anything else right now. But I will try.

I also know people who love it here. My in-laws, who bought their house in the 1970's for 65k love it here too. Maybe I would see it through different eyes if that were the case, though I doubt it. It would be easier to live...but still not desirable in my eyes. My mother lives in Watchung, it is very pretty there, one of the nicest places I have seen in NJ for scenery. If you have a mill+ to live there, then that would be the place. But it's not for me. And it's still not as pretty as other areas of the COUNTRY not just California.

66nexus - you have every right to defend your state that you love. But if you want to defend your state so badly, then tell me....what are young couples supposed to do here? Take for example my friends - a married couple...one a teacher, one a blue collar workin man...they can't buy a decent house here. What should they do? Let me guess, you also got in early, or you have money, or both. Because there IS no way for those folks here unless they buy a crappy starter house for 350k+ that just a few years ago was cheap and inhabited by people who paid next to nothing for it, and it shows. Guess those folks are just SOL, huh? And people like me, doing alright I suppose, (we are getting by, though not fabulously and we do have a nice house.) but we are tired of paying half a mil for nothing I deem worthy. Oh, and I hate the cold. You can keep it!!

Half Moon Bay - you are very lucky to have realized that kind of appreciation, and where you live sounds beautiful, despite the small lot. Enjoy California, even if it is super expensive there is a lot going for it! I hope you find the place that makes you happy as well.

Mike0421 - just read your post before going ahead to post this. You are very well spoken, and I will read again and reply in a little while, but for now I am out of time. I better get off this computer for now - this board is addicting already lol - I will be back later.

[BobKovacs]

You've mentioned a "lack of culture" in NJ several times now, and I just wanted to make this point.

I think you're basing your shangri-la expectations of California on how it's portrayed on TV or something, because I can tell you from first-hand experience that there's nothing "cultural" in CA- they're likely the largest population of fake, keep up with the Jones wannabes on the planet- especially in and around LA.

I know you were there 10 years ago, but a quick road trip/vacation is not something to base a cross-country relo on.

Bob

[anywherebuthere]

Oh crap Bob, here we go back to California again. Oh how I wish I never brought it up....but what's done is done I guess!

I have been to California numerous times and though yes, it has been awhile...I think I still remember what it looks like!!! You keep bringing up only LA - there is so much more to So Cal than that, as I stated when talking about OC.

I truly don't have time right now but couldn't resist a quick reply. The culture I am referring to is not just in California! I just don't dig what there is here, that's all. One quick example - there are no good theatres for my daughter to take classes at. Yes, there is in Red Bank, and up in Metuchen for those who may be interested..there are a few more up north too...but they are too far for me. Every other state I have looked up has local theatre programs that blow away the area I am in in NJ.
I will think of more than that when I come back later. Must. Turn. Off. Computer.

[Onizuka]

Originally Posted by BobKovacs

I think you're basing your shangri-la expectations of California on how it's portrayed on TV or something, because I can tell you from first-hand experience that there's nothing "cultural" in CA- they're likely the largest population of fake, keep up with the Jones wannabes on the planet- especially in and around LA.

Bob, how is your ridiculous stereotyping of LA any different that the threadstarter's generalizations?

You're really in no position to throw stones anyway. I remember you complaining a few months back about how all Indian people in Edison were such terrible drivers. But I guess it's always easier to criticize others for perceived slights than to actually try to comprehend what someone is trying to say.

[tahiti]

Originally Posted by anywherebuthere

tahiti - "WOOSH! That went right over your head. I'm not even going to bother to explain."
- Yes, I was harsh on NJ but not on a particular person. No personal attacks on the people who live here, rather the conditions here. You though, are choosing to personally attack me with your condesending attitude. I think I understood your "anecdotal evidence" comment just fine. It didn't "go over my head", oh holier than thou. All the things I said were general statements, not personal attacks.

OMG! LOL! You are too much. And, yes, you obviously didn't get my statement about anecdotal evidence based on your comment on it.

Originally Posted by anywherebuthere

As far as me posting on the LA forum about the guy bashing it... lol, I knew someone would bring that up! That was what, 7 months ago?

So? I didn't look at the date. What does that have to do with it? Does that mean you aren't hypocritical because some amount of time has passed?

Seriously, are you really that surprised over the reaction you got when you come guns a blazin'? Couple that with the fact your rant about all things evil in NJ (high COL, traffic, no culture) will be MAGNIFIED 10-fold in CA, and...well, ya know. It doesn't make much sense.

Gotta run - got Bruce on the CD , I'm frying up some taylor ham for lunch and gonna sit on my porch and view my "scenery" (btw - i don't live too far from watchung, so you did concede there is scenery in this armpit)..

[tahiti]

Originally Posted by anywherebuthere

The culture I am referring to is not just in California! I just don't dig what there is here, that's all. One quick example - there are no good theatres for my daughter to take classes at. Yes, there is in Red Bank, and up in Metuchen for those who may be interested..there are a few more up north too...but they are too far for me. Every other state I have looked up has local theatre programs that blow away the area I am in in NJ.

Here are some things cultural and historic in NJ:

Thomas Edison's lab and library
Many, many areas where the Revolutionary War was fought
Battleship in Camden
Ellis Island
Central Rail of NJ
Burlington Historic District
NJ Performing Arts Center
Papermill Playhouse

to name a few. Kinda sounds cultural to me.

[Caseynj]

Tahiti....loved the bruce and taylor ham comment! very funny.

[cyntmac]

Originally Posted by anywherebuthere

The rude sarcasm you both convey is a good representation of the attitude here. You can keep your NJ, have fun! I never said "everyone" should leave.

Not everyone who posts here(including this very thread) is from NJ or lives in NJ. Trolls up in here again!!! Trolls- why do you bother posting on NJ forum? It makes no sense. Your useless posts do not contribute to anything productive and I still can't figure out why you continue to post on here. The pork/ham comments over and over get really old. I grew up in Nj and never tasted a porkroll in my life. Honestly I wasn't even sure what it was until I came to this forum. I would expect the trolling to get more original over time but I guess that is too much to ask.