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Old 03-06-2009, 10:42 AM
 
Location: Santa Fe, New Mexico
3,011 posts, read 9,997,467 times
Reputation: 1170

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Seems to me sometimes like the only people who are NOT allowed to have honest and sincere opinions are those of us who have traditional beliefs about marriage being between a man and a woman.

I do not believe in gay marriage; I believe marriage is between a man and a woman only. I have nothing against "domestic partnerships" or legal rights for gay couples as far as wills and insurance, etc.

But for not being in favor of gay marriage, I am likely to be labeled a homophobe, as well as other nasty names, which proves to me we are NOT all respected for our own personal beliefs and opinions -- only *some* segments of our society.
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Old 03-06-2009, 10:52 AM
TKO
 
Location: On the Border
4,153 posts, read 4,252,250 times
Reputation: 3287
Yeah, I think it would be more aptly titled if the thread were called "Welcome to New Mexico Where there are a few Homophobes like Everywhere else including California" - which is the most liberal state in the union supposedly. I have nothing against equal rights. But I agree, despite not being a proponent of traditional values per say and being a democrat, that marriage is the religious joining of a man and a woman.

What we need to do is to completely get the state of the marrying business. Call them Partner Licenses instead of marriage licenses and then everyone gets equal treatment.
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Old 03-06-2009, 10:55 AM
 
2,857 posts, read 6,703,497 times
Reputation: 1747
Quote:
Originally Posted by nmnita View Post
Beats the hell out of me???

Nita

ps, I will add, I don't think this is the issue, to me marriage is a relegious ceremony and it is still between one man and one woman, even if the service is being conducted by a JotP.

Nita
I agree. A marriage license is basically a legal document creating a civil union. Why not just change the name of the license, and make it work for traditional (marriages) and non-traditional unions? If the church will marry same sex couples and you have a license, it should be no one else's business, whether you support it or not.
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Old 03-06-2009, 11:00 AM
 
Location: Yootó
1,305 posts, read 3,601,801 times
Reputation: 811
My personal opinion is that gay marriage should be allowed. I see no reason why gays should not be able to experience a lifetime of unhappiness and strife just as heterosexuals do.
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Old 03-06-2009, 11:42 AM
 
Location: 95468
1,382 posts, read 2,377,539 times
Reputation: 944
Does anyone remember ................................. We don't need government approval of our love.
It's just a piece of paper. Something the breeders do. And just look at how they messed that up.
Half divorced, the other half wishing for. Pleeeeeeeease now are you sure? You really want this marrage thing? My neck is starting to hurt. Gay marrage may sound fun to you now but how about gay divorce?
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Old 03-06-2009, 12:57 PM
 
Location: Marlborough, MA
1,732 posts, read 4,434,651 times
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"marriage is a relegious ceremony and it is still between one man and one woman"

I see, so as an Athiest, my marriage does not count?

I think many people confuse the religious and the secular definition and concept of marriage. The marriage being discussed is the civil one, the legal one. Religious beliefs should carry absolutely no weight in civil law.
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Old 03-06-2009, 04:03 PM
 
Location: Missouri Ozarks
7,394 posts, read 19,282,474 times
Reputation: 4067
Quote:
Originally Posted by domino View Post
I don't think there's any law keeping "common law" couples from getting married. Big difference!
Actually there is a law by the govt. keeping certain couples from getting married.
I'm part of that group.
If I remarry, I lose my annuity and insurance. That's a military law.
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Old 03-06-2009, 04:05 PM
 
Location: Missouri Ozarks
7,394 posts, read 19,282,474 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by vinegaroon View Post
my personal opinion is that gay marriage should be allowed. I see no reason why gays should not be able to experience a lifetime of unhappiness and strife just as heterosexuals do.
lol
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Old 03-06-2009, 04:10 PM
 
Location: Richmond, VA
332 posts, read 1,116,123 times
Reputation: 265
To everyone who says, just write a will, I have to interject that there is a significant financial burden. It is not to just leave your property to your partner, for instance - any will can be contested. A spouse, under the law, has rights that my partner does not. After we have paid an attorney to draft a will (which we have), if I died, for instance, my parents could contest her right to live in our house (which is in my name as I'm the one with traditional employment). If they got a judge who didn't approve of same sex-parings, guess what? My partner could be put out of her own home, just like that. I am fairly certain my parents wouldn't do such a thing, but I know many couples who live with that fear.

We have also had to pay an attorney to draft medical power of attorney documents for both of us, in case of injury or incapacitation. Basically, if one of us goes to the hospital, the other one makes the decisions. A right that heterosexual couples get free with their marriage license.

And, even with all the legal fees and paperwork, there is no guarantee that a hospital would recognize it without a court order. In the meantime, who is making the decisions? The hospital? A social worker? Why should I have to live with that fear, either?

Then there is the cost of insurance. Sure, many companies are now offering it, including mine. But I pay federal taxes on my partner's insurance, just like income. Again, free with a marriage license. And if my workplace stops offering it? Legally, they are not required to, and with the economy faltering and cost cutting becoming the norm, it's probably only a matter of time.

As my partner is disabled, it would also be helpful if we could file taxes jointly and I could claim her. But no, I can't.

Not having legal recognition is a huge burden, financially and emotionally. Still, I think it was unfair of the original poster to use "homophobic" in the title. New Mexicans have, overall, been wonderful to me and my partner. The laws here are better than some places in the U.S., and the fact that there is dialogue is encouraging. I personally don't know why the word "marriage" riles people up, and personally don't care if legal recognition is called something else. Call it "civil union," or "supercalifragilistic." Whatever, I just hope it happens sometime.
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Old 03-06-2009, 04:11 PM
 
Location: Missouri Ozarks
7,394 posts, read 19,282,474 times
Reputation: 4067
Don't get me wrong, marriage is great but I know way too many people that if they didn't have to go through the drama of divorce, the kids and house, etc., they would be out in a heartbeat and the people I'm talking about call themselves christians and godly. How funny is that?
In a domestic partnership or a gay/lesbian partnership, one does not have to go through all the drama. I'm together with my man because I want to be, not because I have to be. Marriage makes you 'have' to be a lot of the time.
(Not talking about the ones in good marriages, so hold the tomato throwing please)
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