Reasons for Leaving the City? (home, neighborhood, construction)

[bilmin]

Your original hypothesis sounds like a sociology book from about 25 years ago. You fail to mention that people who are older (like me) often move into a large city as they downsize their suburban homes. So in cities what you often see is the very young who can live in relative squalor as they "find themselves" and the the older more established people who are still working who want the fun of living in a city and all that this offers. The problem with New York is that this end of the sandwich run out of time and need to move again as they retire since NY is so expensive to live in. I am almost at that point and have lived here for 10 years and will be looking to move to a slower pace and far less expensive way of life in the next few years.

That close friend of mine is from Drums/Wilkes Barre, Pennsylvania, slightly south of Scranton.
I guess my post before was too long. So I'll try to make this shorter.



I was basically answering your thread question for why I left NYC for a while, my experience living somewhere else, saying how I enjoy both places for similar and different reasons with some things(NYC and Seattle), and am wondering if I should ever go back to live in NYC for 4 year college, or an architecture career.



What I meant by the architecture program being “New York centric” is if it ONLY focused on things about NYC in terms of architecture, urban planning, environmental studies, I am glad to hear that it focuses on many other places too and isn’t focused on any one city too much.


I think you misinterpreted what I said about worldly/educated people. There are people like that which can be found every where(which is good and how it should be) and there should be people like that everywhere. I was just saying that the people who happen to be “worldly” and live in NYC are more likely able to see there is a world outside NYC and that there are many other places and cities in the world that can offer positive things and not just NYC.

If I go back to NYC, I want to go back liking things about NYC but being able to appreciate and respect other places in the world too while being an architect there but having this attitude while immersing with all NYC offers. I feel like there are unfortunately some arrogant close minded people in NYC that aren’t able to see that there are places with positive things to offer outside NYC and I hope that’s a very small percentage of people who are like that. Do you think that’s true?

Im basically wondering if everyone/or most people who are pursuing architect studies or careers in NYC see how there is world outside NYC , are able to appreciate, respect, and enjoy other places outside NYC, and if I am an architect there, I could be around like-minded people like that.

I love NYC and Seattle(for one example) and I want to feel the same exact same way if I move back to NYC too.

[foodie23]

I like NY, but I want out. I am a country girl in the city. I want to have a garden, hear birds, smell fresh cut grass and have a picnic in my own back yard.
I like the farmer's market at Union Square, I wish I could get on the truck and head back with one of the vendors
NY is fun and sad.
I am constantly plotting my way out. I stare at the calendar and pray that this time next year I will not be here in the city.
I just wish I could take my salary with me. Money can not buy happiness and without it, things can be really strange.
I have been planning on escaping to TX. With much research into the GOM, I think that would not be wise.
I am now considering Virginia. I would be close enough to NY to get a 'NY fix' and head back to cilivization in time for the work week.
I want to buy a house and it have paid off before I retire and living in NY, that is not likely to happen

[fyremopman]

From what I'm hearing it's sounding like the main reasons for leaving the city are money (#1) and calmer lifestyle (#2).

When I first began thinking about this I assumed incorrectly that the biggest reason for leaving the city would be children/raising a family, possibly because its directly related to money and a calmer lifestyle. Yet most posts above focused on Money (nycistheplace2, jiggeplaya, grant516,) on a calmer life style (Moth, queensgrl, foodie23) or specifically mentioned both (Bronxguyanese, bilmin)

Perhaps the reason I made this assumption was because I had recently read an article in the new yorker titled "I love my kids, I hate my life" as you probably guessed it focused on the stress that parents go through when raising their children. The very next day a woman screamed at me while I was riding my bike to "LOOK OUT" her daughter was riding her bike 20 feet ahead of me and at the time i was slowing down to get off my bike. It was then that I realized the stress of raising a kid in the city must be exceptionally higher than the suburbs or the country simply because of the density and close proximity. A mother bear would be mauling other animals left and right if bears lived in cities. But you might assume that the bears would adapt to the change in their situation and become calmer animals. Obviously bears don't live in the city, people do, and I would think that my assumption would hold true for people living in a much more crowded environment. Yet that woman was ready to knock me off my bike to protect her daughter.

[babysladkaya]

My personal reason for staying in the city, or relatively close to it, actually, in a suburb now, which is 40 minute railroad ride to the city is because of the deep bonds I have with my family and the community. We are Russian Jews, and no other city has such a large population and developed infrastructure for us as New York, or namely, the boroughs, mostly Brooklyn and Queens. And, everything is about 50% cheaper, especially as it relates to kids, be it a daycare, camp, music/art/ballet lessons, etc. Back home, several generations have often lived together in one apartment, or at least, in the same neighborhood/town/city, it was unheard of to have your parents/kids live in another city, maybe only as temporary situation such as college/work assignment, so this has definitely stayed with us. As an accountant, I could probably find work anywhere in this country, however, I would not want to be further than a 35 minute drive from my folks. We did, however, move from our small Brooklyn apartment to suburbs for space and schools. So, I think, a lot also depends on cultural values, and having large representation of one's own kind in NYC is what largely attracts people to staying here. I have a friend who lives on a very nice block in Bensonhurst, most of the families are Italians, and sometimes, there are 2-3 generations of the same family on the block and the unspoken rule is-before you list the house with real estate, let the elders of the block know-perhaps, someone from a family wants to buy it.

[holden125]

Originally Posted by fyremopman

When I first began thinking about this I assumed incorrectly that the biggest reason for leaving the city would be children/raising a family, possibly because its directly related to money and a calmer lifestyle. Yet most posts above focused on Money (nycistheplace2, jiggeplaya, grant516,) on a calmer life style (Moth, queensgrl, foodie23) or specifically mentioned both (Bronxguyanese, bilmin)

Maybe the people responding don't have kids. But there's still a clear connection between having kids on the one hand, and being financially strapped and wanting a calmer lifestyle on the other hand.

For me, the financial reasons for getting out of NYC had a lot to do with a desire to have kids. It wasn't so much that I didn't want them to grow up in NYC, or thought having kids in the city would be more stressful than anywhere else. I just couldn't imagine being able to afford space big enough for three or four people without feeling cramped or commuting more than I wanted to.

[Moth]

Originally Posted by fyremopman

Moth,

Suppose you were pulling in a million dollars: Do you think you would still want to start a family In the slope (my personal preference over Manhattan : )

Also do you think being able to "get out" regularly is part of living "well" in NYC

PS I don't think the city is a good place to live for the poor either.

Question 1: Certainly an appealing scenario. Probably yes.

Question 2: I think "getting out" or the occassional change of scenery is necessary no matter where you live. New York, with its intensity, might necessitate it a bit more.

My comment on the poor in NYC was based on the fact that New York has a very extensive welfare state. Not saying its good or bad.

[SobroGuy]

Just for the record, you can live in NYC and have a backyard, garden, birds, fruit trees, bbqs, a garage, etc...and affordably at that. You won't get it in Manhattan, but you will in the outerboroughs, especially the Bronx, Southern Bronx included. There are quite a few new/newer construction homes that are suburban style and would meet your criteria. You should educate yourself about what is available in NYC before you make the move to "greener" pastures.

[AJoy77]

Originally Posted by SobroGuy

Just for the record, you can live in NYC and have a backyard, garden, birds, fruit trees, bbqs, a garage, etc...and affordably at that. You won't get it in Manhattan, but you will in the outerboroughs, especially the Bronx, Southern Bronx included. There are quite a few new/newer construction homes that are suburban style and would meet your criteria. You should educate yourself about what is available in NYC before you make the move to "greener" pastures.

I am going through the same situation right now. I have been itching to leave NYC for a year, and now have an opportunity. Sadly I am having second thoughts.

I'm curious of where in the Bronx you consider comparable athestically and cost-wise to anywhere down south. Besides *maybe* Riverdale, it is all pretty subpar to me!

[makossa]

Originally Posted by nycistheplace2

Im leaving because of the high cost of living here.
The grass is greener down south. Thats were I'll be.

I thought you were buying an 8 bedroom house in Chicago (Englewood)?