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Old 07-26-2010, 06:26 AM
 
118 posts, read 391,855 times
Reputation: 140

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I came here a few months back from the Midwest. I think a lot of you may know my story. 29, single, female, and living up in West Harlem. I really am finding myself disappointed by this place, and don't understand the allure of it anymore. It's the absolute filthiest place I have ever been. I have smelled things here so God-awful I cannot even believe it. The people are rude, that goes without saying. But so remarkably so it is beyond my comprehension. Back home, a person would get the **** kicked out of the in a back alleyway for talking and acting the way a lot of people here do.

I thought there would be better job opportunities here. But from what I have experienced, it is just the same **** as back home. Employers trying to get you to work for slave wages, undercutting everyone to the bone. That may have almost worked in Michigan, much less expensive. It sure as hell doesn't work here. I have to wait tables to survive, and have never taken such verbal abuse in all of my fourteen years that I have been doing that as I have here. People ought to be ashamed of themselves.

And I just want to punch the lights out of most of the snobby youth I see in Manhattan. So out of touch, it is unbelievable. I can understand why people want to execute those on Wall Street now. I will be the first in line with them if there is to ever be a Revolution in this country. The discrepancy between haves and have-nots here is repulsive. Average banker making $350K, average everyone-else maybe 40K if lucky. When the rent is astronomical, and taxes are astronomical. Doesn't really lure any right-minded middle class person, now does it? Especially when you are going to be taxed to death just to pay all of those lovely 3rd grade educated babymamas. While the rich get off cheap and you live to serve them.
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Old 07-26-2010, 06:45 AM
 
Location: Bronx
14,780 posts, read 17,404,166 times
Reputation: 7508
As a born and raised new yorker I'm with you on this one. I just came back from vegas recently and now I'm thinking about packing my duffel bag again and leave this kosher forsaken city for good. There is so much people out of touch with reality in nyc its just not even worth giving somebody reality with my knuckles. However I still love nyc. Sometimes you have to put with what's going on and move on with life.

Last edited by Bronxguyanese; 07-26-2010 at 07:16 AM..
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Old 07-26-2010, 07:01 AM
 
Location: from houstoner to bostoner to new yorker to new jerseyite ;)
4,085 posts, read 11,220,884 times
Reputation: 1940
Why did you move here?
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Old 07-26-2010, 07:07 AM
 
Location: Beautiful Pelham Parkway,The Bronx
8,389 posts, read 19,623,816 times
Reputation: 6215
Quote:
Originally Posted by HarlemNewbie View Post
I came here a few months back from the Midwest. I think a lot of you may know my story. 29, single, female, and living up in West Harlem. I really am finding myself disappointed by this place, and don't understand the allure of it anymore. It's the absolute filthiest place I have ever been. I have smelled things here so God-awful I cannot even believe it. The people are rude, that goes without saying. But so remarkably so it is beyond my comprehension. Back home, a person would get the **** kicked out of the in a back alleyway for talking and acting the way a lot of people here do.

I thought there would be better job opportunities here. But from what I have experienced, it is just the same **** as back home. Employers trying to get you to work for slave wages, undercutting everyone to the bone. That may have almost worked in Michigan, much less expensive. It sure as hell doesn't work here. I have to wait tables to survive, and have never taken such verbal abuse in all of my fourteen years that I have been doing that as I have here. People ought to be ashamed of themselves.

And I just want to punch the lights out of most of the snobby youth I see in Manhattan. So out of touch, it is unbelievable. I can understand why people want to execute those on Wall Street now. I will be the first in line with them if there is to ever be a Revolution in this country. The discrepancy between haves and have-nots here is repulsive. Average banker making $350K, average everyone-else maybe 40K if lucky. When the rent is astronomical, and taxes are astronomical. Doesn't really lure any right-minded middle class person, now does it? Especially when you are going to be taxed to death just to pay all of those lovely 3rd grade educated babymamas. While the rich get off cheap and you live to serve them.
I am really sorry that you have had such a bad experience, HarlemNewbie.
Don't know whether you just came at a really bad time or whether you are simply not suited for life in NY.Not everyone is.
When you first posted a thread about when one should decide to bail out of NY, I was inclined to think you should give it a little longer.This post however leads me to believe that you really should probably get out of this place ASAP. Your attitude has grown more and more toxic and I am sure it's getting in the way of job hunting and everything else.Why stay in a place that makes you so miserable?
Really,for your own good,get out before things get worse.
I hope things work out better for you wherever you go.
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Old 07-26-2010, 07:44 AM
 
8,750 posts, read 15,552,768 times
Reputation: 4168
It is certainly not for everyone...that's for sure. And I think at this point the game has changed and you have to make a choice: As a regular working Joe (or in your case Jane), especially those who are new to the city and don't know many people, you are relegated to neighborhoods that are affordable to regular people which are either too far from the city (way east Brooklyn/Queens), or "transitioning" areas closer in to the city like Southern Bronx and Harlem/Washington Heights.

It helps alot being closer to the city, but living in a low-income, typically heavily Hispanic/Black community is a major change and can be completely ridiculous and shocking (even for me as a local). This is the reality for regular NYers, and not just newbies, who can't afford NYC anymore..they either make the choice to live in either of these situations, or leave the city entirely. If you can't sacrifice commuting time, or a closer low-income community of color which may or may not be 'transitioning', then your only choice is to leave. NYC is highly competitive and has become moreso lately...so although you have had it and may be leaving, there are 10 other people who will gladly take your place.
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Old 07-26-2010, 07:46 AM
grant516
 
n/a posts
I always cringe when I see everyone's responses that any poster who wants to leave NYC... "it's not for everyone". The OP's point is a VERY valid one- and not a personal specific.

The discrepancy in pay in Manhattan is absolutely out of control.

The discrepancy in rent control, or people's contribution living in NYCHA is insane as well.

It's not for everyone in this case includes HarlemNewbie as she isn't clearing over 75K a year.
You know in SF City, a waiter makes about $9.79 an hour, plus tips; also they are eligible for health benefits through the City itself.

Not to say that SF is a haven for anyone, just that NYC has a long way to go with progressive laws to aid a middle class.
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Old 07-26-2010, 07:58 AM
 
373 posts, read 1,330,746 times
Reputation: 112
I've also lived here in NY Metro all my life and agree 100% with the OP. And for all those dreamers asking "should I move to NY?" without a high paying job or a special talent that will make you the next Madonna, pay close attention. It isn't like what you see on Friends or Seinfeld.
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Old 07-26-2010, 08:02 AM
 
Location: Houston, Tx
541 posts, read 1,669,496 times
Reputation: 397
I love when people can't seem to hack it on their own that it somehow becomes the city's problem and not theirs. I'm not rich by any means and I love it here. Some people I guess come here expecting a Sex and the City lifestyle and are surprised when things fall short.
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Old 07-26-2010, 08:30 AM
 
8,750 posts, read 15,552,768 times
Reputation: 4168
You have to agree though that a midwestern gal moving to Harlem on a modest budget will have a tough time of it to say the least. I recognize that....and I wish her the best..it isn't easy and harder than most people realize.

That being said, what she may or may not realize is that what she is currently experiencing, the stresses that she listed like the smells, attitudes, behaviors, rudeness, salaries, rich vs everyone else, etc are all the quintessential NYC experience! She is forgetting also the other quintessential NYC experience of great restaurants, cheap and reliable public transit 24/7, every type of person on the planet represented in a tiny area without much tension at all, the ability to brush shoulders with the global elite, access to a broad range of opportunities/jobs, and a diversity of neighborhoods in class/wealth/income/color, and top notch cultural venues, etc.

There is lots of bad, and lots of good....and put together they are the quintessential NYC experience. Maybe the bad is outweighing the good right now..however I suspect if she sticks it out the good will outweigh the bad and she will enjoy living in the city.
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Old 07-26-2010, 08:43 AM
 
Location: No Sleep Til Brooklyn
1,413 posts, read 4,673,300 times
Reputation: 591
As a woman, I have to say that living in Harlem would make me want to pack up and leave, also. I've lived in rough neighborhoods, but the constant street harassment and noise in Harlem was unbearable. It wasn't worth the relatively cheap rent.

It's a depressing time to be looking for work in NYC. I don't think it is unreasonable to move on.
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