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PS I am 100% fluent in Spanish and have to deal with things like cat calling etc here in MExico. I do tend to avoid going out alone when possible but will have to get used to going it alone in NY.
Thinking of the areas discussed: Riverdale, Jackson Heights, Sunnyside, Forest Hills, Astoria, Long Island City, and possibly another couple I can't think of right now.
Women, let's assume you are in your late 20s, blonde and have a young baby. Would you feel safe walking around the aforementioned areas during the daytime? Or if you have a daughter fitting that description would you be OK with her walking around the said areas? Would you feel comfortable with your husband walking home from the subway station possibly very late at night?
Men: Let's assume you have wives, girlfriends or daughters that fit the above description. Would you feel comfortable knowing they were walking around these areas, again with a baby. Would you yourselves feel comfortable coming home from work late at night?
On a side note: is there anywhere in Brooklyn that would be appropriate for us? I have found some areas with affordable rents there too and wondered what they were like: Williamsburg, Bushwick, Kensington, Bedford, Crown Heights.....
Thanks again.
Riverdale is perfectly safe at all times of the day and you won't stick out because there are plenty of White people here (majority White), though we have some diversity.
As for these lies about it being so inconvenient, there is plenty of transportation here. We don't have a subway here which apparently is why everyone keeps yelling that it is so "inconvenient". You would think we were in the boonies somewhere. We're right above Manhattan and only a 15 - 20 minute drive from the main action. There is PLENTY of transportation here. Metro North, three express buses and city buses as well. I mean how much more transportation does one need??
Also there are only select parts of Riverdale that aren't as walkable like some areas near me in Fieldston, but most are walkable. Unless you're stuck on the idea that an area is "transportation starved" unless there is a subway rumbling through it you will be just fine here.
Thinking of the areas discussed: Riverdale, Jackson Heights, Sunnyside, Forest Hills, Astoria, Long Island City, and possibly another couple I can't think of right now.
Women, let's assume you are in your late 20s, blonde and have a young baby. Would you feel safe walking around the aforementioned areas during the daytime? Or if you have a daughter fitting that description would you be OK with her walking around the said areas? Would you feel comfortable with your husband walking home from the subway station possibly very late at night?
Men: Let's assume you have wives, girlfriends or daughters that fit the above description. Would you feel comfortable knowing they were walking around these areas, again with a baby. Would you yourselves feel comfortable coming home from work late at night?
You will have less to worry about in this regard if you live in Riverdale or Forest Hills as opposed to Jackson Heights. Of course, rents are also more expensive in these places for these reasons.
Long Island City and Astoria - check how much the rentals are nowadays. Especially LIC, I think they can be well above $2,500 for a 2BR.
Jackson Heights won't be in issue in terms of fitting in with a baby if you stay within the boundaries as described by Henna. And the main strip where most JHers do their shopping is 37th Avenue which is a clean road. I do not foresee the need to go to Roosevelt Ave. for daily requirements other than to satisfy your curiosity for ethnic cuisine (there are actually ethnic food tours done there). However, your husband will have to face the unsightly views of Roosevelt in his daily commute. Also, JH is still lacking in casual dining options and cafes unlike in other places. For that you will have to drive somewhere else. But again, rents there are relatively cheaper and you will find a 2BR in a good prewar building for $2,000 or a little less.
Given all the considerations you posted, including your husband's commuting preferences, I believe the best neighborhood for your family will be Riverdale even if you have to extend your budget. Other than having to pay a little more, I don't think there will be anything else you need to worry about.
I think it is possible to get a 2 bedroom for 2k in Astoria. I believe my neighbors were paying that when we were in Queens. (But forget Manhattan )
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We're right above Manhattan and only a 15 - 20 minute drive from the main action. There is PLENTY of transportation here. Metro North, three express buses and city buses as well. I mean how much more transportation does one need?? 
