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I am 30 years old and currently live in Hoboken, NJ. I work in the financial district NYC. I'm over the party scene and clubbing etc. I was never really a drinker because I have almost 0 tolerance against that. I wonder where and how would be a perfect way to approach women around the city. They usually don't even make eye contact because they all seem like they're running late somewhere.
I think it would be nice to meet a nice decent girl who has similar likes. We can go walk around Manhattan and sit in the parks. Do things we haven't done previously. Hoboken is sucha party town where everyone is usually walking drunk after 9pm on a weekend. Um so back to meeting women in NYC. Any spots? Any tips? Any good way to approach them?
Here's another strategy you can do in parallel - When your lease is up, move to a suburban neighborhood. Every day you commute by train to Manhattan (MNR, LIRR), wear business attire (sports jacket, dress pants, button down shirt) and carry with you and read or pretend to be reading the Wall St. Journal. In other words, look and behave like an Exec/Director while commuting. I've been approached on the train and station not a few times (maybe 10% of the time) under these same conditions. You can also be a little more aggressive and intentionally sit on the same seat with an attractive commuter and initiate something like asking for the time or if it is an express train.
Presumably you graduated from college and have a stable FT corporate job so that should be an asset.
You can never go wrong with sports jacket, button down shirt and a diamond slant wedding band in 14 K gold. The Richard Gere style. And Wall Street Journal is the Dictionary of Love.
If you're not a dog lover then I can't see that helping, poor dog. I think there's a service now where you can rent a dog for these purposes. So I guess you'll have to end up lying about why the dog isn't with you anymore if you begin a relationship with one of these women or lie from the start saying it's a friend's/relative's dog. What a way to start a relationship.
Men, oh brother.
Can't live without them and can't murder them either. lol
If you're not a dog lover then I can't see that helping, poor dog. I think there's a service now where you can rent a dog for these purposes. So I guess you'll have to end up lying about why the dog isn't with you anymore if you begin a relationship with one of these women or lie from the start saying it's a friend's/relative's dog. What a way to start a relationship.
Men, oh brother.
Can't live without them and can't murder them either. lol
To make it more dramatic say someone stole my dog!
some of these responses are pure gold...pretending to be someone your not? classic.
no wonder some guys have such a hard time.
just be yourself, you will meet the right one or at least have fun meeting a few 'not so right ones' along the way.
one thing a lot of girls in this town love are men without an aversion to getting a little dirty, read: not a metro-sexual hipster type.
if you can pull off the rugged yet dapper working man look without looking like you spent a month of paychecks to make it happen your gold.
smile, but not too much or you look like a used car salesman.
engage them in genuine conversation, whatever the topic may be.
ask them about THEM and talk about THEIR interests, and be sincere or it doesn't count.
carry yourself with confidence, shoulders back, head up, remember that first impressions and body language matter.
most importantly, don't try too hard.
it's EASY as hell to meet women here but as with all things your mileage may vary.
OP's problem right now is how to make contact and not yet how to take a relationship to the next stage, at which point one's character and conversational skills becomes more important. Right now, he is being turned away before he can utter a single word.
Let's face it. Women in NYC are judgmental of male strangers as are all people of other strangers for that matter. The ones he is targeting are looking for evidence of average attractiveness, responsibility, emotional/financial stability and potential for success on the surface (which is frequently an indicator of reality). "Just be yourself" does not cut it out if his natural tendency is to project himself as someone who is of average potential or in some cases, sloppy.
Just as one must dress and act for the job he wants, so too must one do for the woman he wants.
Last edited by Forest_Hills_Daddy; 08-15-2013 at 01:02 PM..
Get involved with some volunteer activity or group of people with common interests. And, if you're religiously inclined, church and related activities might be a good idea.
The WORST place to meet women is in a bar.
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What a way to start a relationship.
