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New York State housing laws don't allow me to change the locks and lock him out. He can call the cops to get in. In New York once a person is in for 30 days even without paying rent or anything I can't lock him out. He has more rights than I do.
A lawyer told me that if I throw his stuff in the hallway and not open the door when he knocks, he can call the cops and they will force me to let him in. The only way for me to get him out is by going to court. I have been in contact with his mother -- my sister and she won't take him in. She told me to do what I have to, even if it means going to court. His mother has a 2-bedroom apartment, but my nephew doesn't get along with my sister's boyfriend who lives with her.
This has been happening for the past couple of years. Every other time he came he wouldn't leave also, but after 6 months or 11 months he ended up going, but not this time. Next month will be two years. I've told him that I will take him to court and he starts laughing and tells me to go ahead. He tells me to enjoy myself doing it. He just happens to be a 30-year old punk.
How should I handle that. When I tell him to leave he will either laugh and walk away or shake his head and close his eyes. He's doing what he wants and I'm the one that has to suffer for it. The court process is a long one.
Thanks for all the advice. New York State housing laws need to be changed. They're not fair. I should be able to just lock him out.
Another problem I also have is that when he bangs on the door or the wall leading to the bedroom to get in, my neighbors call security to complain. It doesn't get rid of him. It only causes problems for me with the landlord of my building.
You are going to have to evict him. But there may be a better way. Is he doing anything illegal? You might be able to get him arrested. Then you can change the locks. And tell his sister that if she bails him out, she can leave, too.
They had a hard life growing up. My sister had problems. She had my niece and a set of twins. The boys - the set of twins are night and day, My other nephew works. lives on his own and just recently got married, so there is no way he can take his brother in. He lives in a 1-bedroom apartment in Jersey.
The nephew I'm dealing with had his mother arrested when he was about 11 or 12 years old. He ended up in a group home. I've had trouble dealing with him when he was very young. He would come to my house for Christmas with his brother when they were young. He would get the toys I bought for him and on the way out he would curse me. etc. He would also tell me to suck his ...
I've spoken to a lawyer and he can call the cops if I lock him out. It will be 2 years and he just doesn't leave, even if I tell him to. I guess the only way for me to get him out is by going to court, which I didn't want to. I want him to leave on his own. If I go to court and the court says that he has to go, and he doesn't leave within the amount of time that the court gives him, I would then have to have a marshal remove him, and that I read was something like $1,500 to have done.
Ok, I'm not in your shoes, but I don't see why on the 20th day you didn't get the cops to toss him out. Or on the 29th. Or why you didn't go to court on the 30 day. Or the 40th, or the 50th. There must have been signs all along that he did not respect you - or intend to leave on his own?
But those days are gone now. It is time to go to court TOMORROW.
They had a hard life growing up. My sister had problems. She had my niece and a set of twins. The boys - the set of twins are night and day, My other nephew works. lives on his own and just recently got married, so there is no way he can take his brother in. He lives in a 1-bedroom apartment in Jersey.
The nephew I'm dealing with had his mother arrested when he was about 11 or 12 years old. He ended up in a group home. I've had trouble dealing with him when he was very young. He would come to my house for Christmas with his brother when they were young. He would get the toys I bought for him and on the way out he would curse me. etc. He would also tell me to suck his ...
OK, now I don't believe this thread at all. Either you are the worst (best) patsy in the world, or this thread is a bunch of hooey.
I wish that would work. They are great suggestions, but he sleeps on the floor most of the time. I had an air mattress and he started using it so I made a big hole in it. He tried to put a patch, but it wouldn't work. I try to make his life miserable by telling him to get out every chance I get, but he doesn't care.
When it comes to him eating, he will wait until I'm sleeping and go in the frig. We cook our meals, especially for the kids. I try to make dinner where everything goes and there are no leftovers, but there are days when he will come from work and the kids are eating so he will help himself to the food. I try not to argue with him in front of the kids. I don't want to make their lives miserable.
I can't lock everything up. He will go in the frig and the cabinets and help himself to food. There is something definitely wrong because he won't even wash his own clothes. He will wear them for months at a time without washing them.
One time his clothes smelled so bad that my niece washed them when she washed her own clothes. I don't think he takes drugs and I do know the warning signs since my sister and brother were both drug addicts. The only other thing I can think of is that he drinks alot or that he could possibly be gambling.
The only bill he paid was for his cell phone. There were a lot of months that his cell was turned off for non-payment, but he always managed to turn it back on.
Why has me really curious is that he recently lost his cell phone and he hasn't gone out to buy a new one. He always bought himself a cheap cell phone and this time he's going without one. It's been about two months. Even when he was out of work he always had a cell phone. Something is definitely wrong, but that's not my problem.
I guess I have no choice but go to court to evict him. Thanks everyone for all the suggestions.
This posting is true. I guess I'm a patsy. I'm 60 years old and I have bad osteo in my knees. I'm still working, but it is very hard for me to get around. I just had a week out of work because of the pain in my knees. Just the thought of going to court and going through months trying to get him out is too much for me, but I guess I have no choice.
I was hoping there was another way to do it, but I guess not.
This posting is true. I guess I'm a patsy. I'm 60 years old and I have bad osteo in my knees. I'm still working, but it is very hard for me to get around. I just had a week out of work because of the pain in my knees. Just the thought of going to court and going through months trying to get him out is too much for me, but I guess I have no choice.
I was hoping there was another way to do it, but I guess not.
I don't understand why you keep making excuses and avoiding the true issue. He has to go.You have to go to court. There is no other option. And while you are there, get a protective order because he sounds like a real loser. Either that or prepare to be his slave for the rest of your life... bad knees and all.
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