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My fiancee and I broke up 7 years ago. It wasn't pretty. No I never hit her, and I have not spoken to her in any way shape or form in over 5 years.
She's going through some crap where someone who created an email address with my name is bothering her, or so she says.
I got a call from her brother in law who is an nypd homicide detective who says he wants to meet with me and if I don't he will notify the district attorney's office to question me.
I politely told him this is not my problem and if someone used my name in an email due to the fact I have not spoken to her in over 5 years doesn't make it my problem and that I can't help her. He will not leave me alone.
Before I go and exert my civil rights I wonder if anyone here has any experience with off duty police officers and the authority they have in getting involved with issues that are personal? I have yet to hear from any police officer other than him on this and he's called me 3 times. He's starting to feel like a bully with a badge..he may care about this issue in a sincere manner and while he may be acting with good intentions it doesn't mean I have to deal with a woman who I have put in my past and I want her to remain in my past.
What can I do if he continues to harass me? thank you.
Change your e-mail address, although I don't understand how someone could have your exact addy...but then I have no knowledge of or interest in computer hacking.
Do not meet with him or her. It is not inconceivable that you are being set up for blackmail.
It's not my email address, it's a different email address with my first and last name in the name field. No one hacking, someone created an email with my name, the email address itself is different from mine.
Well then, you have a perfect defense. Ignore the two jokers and if brother in law wants to "call the District Attorney," let him.
I doubt he is so stupid as to go though with it.
They are making threats likely for the same reason most people do...to get money out of you.
My fiancee and I broke up 7 years ago. It wasn't pretty. No I never hit her, and I have not spoken to her in any way shape or form in over 5 years.
She's going through some crap where someone who created an email address with my name is bothering her, or so she says.
I got a call from her brother in law who is an nypd homicide detective who says he wants to meet with me and if I don't he will notify the district attorney's office to question me.
I politely told him this is not my problem and if someone used my name in an email due to the fact I have not spoken to her in over 5 years doesn't make it my problem and that I can't help her. He will not leave me alone.
Before I go and exert my civil rights I wonder if anyone here has any experience with off duty police officers and the authority they have in getting involved with issues that are personal? I have yet to hear from any police officer other than him on this and he's called me 3 times. He's starting to feel like a bully with a badge..he may care about this issue in a sincere manner and while he may be acting with good intentions it doesn't mean I have to deal with a woman who I have put in my past and I want her to remain in my past.
What can I do if he continues to harass me? thank you.
Go to the District Attorney yourself and report this to them. And also go to Police Headquarters to whatever division handles police misconduct complaints and ask them first if this is even a real police officer contacting you (unless you already know him & know for a fact that he is a real police officer) or if it is an actual or potential scam or a blackmail attempt by a non-police officer, or even if he is a real police officer, if it is found by them that he is attempting to do something illegal such as trying to blackmail you); and then, if it IS a real officer, then ask if the officer is within his legal rights and authority to do what he is doing with you.
And say to the Police Dept. as a whole that, if there is a suspicision that YOU are involved in wrongdoing against your ex-fiancee, then the Police Dept. itself should formally take it upon themselves to investigate YOU formally (so that they can rule in or rule out for themselves that you yourself are doing this or else not doing this) or to otherwise learn for themselves what is the actual and real cause or source of your fiancee's alleged or actual experienced "harrasment" via email (that is, is she REALLY being harassed by someone using your name via email or not? and if so, why and by whom [if not you] and how is the perpetrator or perpetrators managing to accomplish this type of crime with using your name?). And ask them to find out from her why, if she is being harassed in this manner, hasn't she HERSELF gone formally to the Police or DA or whomever to report you?
Also, put a RECORDING DEVICE on your home phone that records all incoming (and optionally outgoing) calls in their entirety, or else using a SPECIAL RECORDING SOFTWARE APP for your model of smartphone. In summary: whatever phone or phones you receive calls from anyone on for anything, put a recording device or recording software on EACH of them -- to record ALL incoming voice calls in their entirety IN REAL-TIME (as the calls are occurring between you and the caller) and optionally ALL or just SOME outgoing calls can be recorded in their entirety as well. And then save ALL voicemail messages left for you as well in their entirety. AND THEN, anytime he or anyone calls you regarding this matter, immediately tell the Police and/or DA and turn copies of the recordings over to them as proof of what transpired.
Also, put a RECORDING DEVICE on your home phone that records all incoming (and optionally outgoing) calls in their entirety, or else using a SPECIAL RECORDING SOFTWARE APP for your model of smartphone. In summary: whatever phone or phones you receive calls from anyone on for anything, put a recording device or recording software on EACH of them -- to record ALL incoming voice calls in their entirety IN REAL-TIME (as the calls are occurring between you and the caller) and optionally ALL or just SOME outgoing calls can be recorded in their entirety as well. And then save ALL voicemail messages left for you as well in their entirety. AND THEN, anytime he or anyone calls you regarding this matter, immediately tell the Police and/or DA and turn copies of the recordings over to them as proof of what transpired.
if do record, make sure you state that you are using a recording device. It can be illegal to record phone conversions if both parties don't agree to it.
Location: Free State of Florida, Support our police
5,851 posts, read 3,272,060 times
Reputation: 9123
Quote:
Originally Posted by azspeedbullet
if do record, make sure you state that you are using a recording device. It can be illegal to record phone conversions if both parties don't agree to it.
Not true at all. As long as a one party is aware of the taping it is 100% legal to do so. However until such a time as you notify him that his calls are harassing and you no longer want his phone calls he really hasn't done anything wrong.
Not true at all. As long as a one party is aware of the taping it is 100% legal to do so. However until such a time as you notify him that his calls are harassing and you no longer want his phone calls he really hasn't done anything wrong.
Demanding that someone meet with him (or indeed demanding ANYTHING) with the addendum "or I will report your evil deeds to the police" sounds like blackmail to me.
Demanding that someone meet with him (or indeed demanding ANYTHING) with the addendum "or I will report your evil deeds to the police" sounds like blackmail to me.
Well it's not. Reporting what one perceives to be a crime to the police is never blackmail.
To the OP, the "authority" of off-duty police is not really the question here. This detective should not be getting involved in a personal matter in this manner. Properly, he may offer advice to his family member, but he should not have contacted you directly. That said, it is a minor matter which would not result in trouble for him unless he kept it up after you told him to stop, as retiredcop stated. In no way, shape or form have his actions even remotely approached the level of "blackmail" (in quotes because blackmail is not a penal law crime).
If he calls again, tell him not to contact you further, that you are not involved in this matter and that if he feels a crime has been committed then he knows how to handle it properly.
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