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Old 12-25-2016, 03:28 AM
 
785 posts, read 346,210 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by caribny View Post
It doesn't bother me until it does. The same man who is scared in the elevator maybe the one who you then have to engage with in a work setting.


Do you still think that it doesn't matter? Because if black men scare him he will minimize his exposure to those who he doesn't know.
Of course it doesn't matter. I'm at work to work, not make friends or judge whether people like me or whatever. And we all have people who we would rather not be around. It may not always be based on race, it may be class/economics based or even ethnicity or nationality. It could be learned from your family or brought on by your own experience. It could be rational, or completely irrational. Many black people where I grew up in Brooklyn had a pretty irrational dislike of Jews. Why? Because they felt that they controlled everything. No one is immune from those types of feelings. But you can't force people to see you a certain way or not react to you in a certain way. Be yourself and leave them be. Or you'll waste your time getting frustrated with something over which you have zero control.
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Old 12-25-2016, 03:29 AM
 
23,275 posts, read 16,124,122 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by anonimuso View Post
Of course it doesn't matter. I'm at work to work, not make friends or judge whether people like me or whatever. And we all have people who we would rather not be around. It may not always be based on race, it may be class/economics based or even ethnicity or nationality. It could be learned from your family or brought on by your own experience. It could be rational, or completely irrational. Many black people where I grew up in Brooklyn had a pretty irrational dislike of Jews. Why? Because they felt that they controlled everything. No one is immune from those types of feelings. But you can't force people to see you a certain way or not react to you in a certain way. Be yourself and leave them be. Or you'll waste your time getting frustrated with something over which you have zero control.
At the same point if someone doesn't like me like that, why would I want to be around them?
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Old 12-25-2016, 03:36 AM
 
785 posts, read 346,210 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by caribny View Post
'


Its always interesting how the REAL racists are the ones who call those who confront them racist.


Talk to any black professional man who isn't built like a twink and they will tell you that learning how to be "non threatening" to white men is a vital tool that they need to learn.


But you not being black will deny this as after all being who you are means that you know 100% if what others m=encounter.
Ok, this is the type of bull**** that I'm talking about. Any black man who purposely curtails his nature to be 'less threatening' to white men is a fool. These people, sadly, are still living in slave times in their minds.

Yes, I am a black professional, and I'm 6'2" and 275 lbs. But NO, I will never learn how to be "non-threatening". I'm confident and big and strong, and if you don't like it, that's because they are weak. And I'm not going to make myself look weak to appease someone else.
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Old 12-25-2016, 03:36 AM
 
23,275 posts, read 16,124,122 times
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Originally Posted by caribny View Post
Folks generally just don't just hire foreigners, especially in countries where jobs are allocated based on cronyism. Yes you might get a job with an end date. And they can withdraw that work permit as they wish.


They do have many professionals in those countries too. You think they will stand aside and let some cushy job go to some Yankee? If these people don't even like returning migrants you think that they will like you to remain indefinitely?


I doubt that your friend will want to remain indefinitely in Congo either. I assume that its isn't the DRC.
Having checked into the various categories of visas in each of the Latin American nations, there's no worry there.

In fact I have enough money not to work. If I don't like my job, I can quit and get a STUDENT visa and simply study Spanish literature.

My friend and I are both teachers, and native English speakers are preferred in Latin America and Francophone Africa. So both of us can stay as long as we like.

Of course, I know various foreigners who formed their own businesses in Latin America as well, and luckily Columbia University has a good network around the world.

I know a number of Americans who have bought property in Latin America, something I am considering as well. Money and purchases always talk in Latin America.

So yes, I have no problem with staying permanently. A number of people I know from the US and Britain have married people in various countries in Latin America and made that country my permanent home. As for my friend in the Congo she is looking for a husband right now.

Lots of Americans permanently move out of the country.

And by the way, this is not my first time out of the US.

Some immigrants in NYC think every Black America is the corner street dude on welfare, or that every white American is some hick from Alabama. Some of us (Americans) have substantial lives and interests out of the country ,and my trips and interviews this year were hardly my first time or exposure or being in Latin America.
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Old 12-25-2016, 03:38 AM
 
23,275 posts, read 16,124,122 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by anonimuso View Post
Ok, this is the type of bull**** that I'm talking about. Any black man who purposely curtails his nature to be 'less threatening' to white men is a fool. These people, sadly, are still living in slave times in their minds.

Yes, I am a black professional, and I'm 6'2" and 275 lbs. But NO, I will never learn how to be "non-threatening". I'm confident and big and strong, and if you don't like it, that's because they are weak. And I'm not going to make myself look weak to appease someone else.
I agree with you here.
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Old 12-25-2016, 03:38 AM
 
785 posts, read 346,210 times
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Originally Posted by NyWriterdude View Post
At the same point if someone doesn't like me like that, why would I want to be around them?
You don't have to 'be around them'. As I said, if you're there to work, then work. It's not a hangout club. And if it's a person on the street, you look past them and keep walking. If it's someone one the elevator, you stand your ground, ride the elevator till your stop, then get off and keep moving. But no one is forcing you to make friends with people who you think are treating you poorly.
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Old 12-25-2016, 03:45 AM
 
23,275 posts, read 16,124,122 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by anonimuso View Post
You don't have to 'be around them'. As I said, if you're there to work, then work. It's not a hangout club. And if it's a person on the street, you look past them and keep walking. If it's someone one the elevator, you stand your ground, ride the elevator till your stop, then get off and keep moving. But no one is forcing you to make friends with people who you think are treating you poorly.
No, but if I feel that I do not like the work environment, then I can choose not to be there.

As for work not being a hangout club, what line of work you do? I've worked in the film industry, and people get jobs through personal referrals. Meaning you better have relatives or friends to hook you up, or it ain't happening. And though the film industry is a lot more extreme about it, you have this in tech, real estate, Wall Street, advertising, etc. The best opportunities you won't find being advertised, you'll have to get them from your personal network. In fact outside of work there are a lot of networking events in various fields, and arguably a huge part of why people go to universities is because of the networking/social opportunities.

So if you really feel the people at your job don't like you (if this extends to management) your chances of moving up the corporate ladder are non existent, and should the company be under strain you'll likely be the first to be fired. So then people should focus on finding companies and work environments that fit in, and where they actually get along with the people and belong.
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Old 12-25-2016, 04:37 AM
 
Location: Staten Island, NY
7,915 posts, read 6,494,962 times
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Originally Posted by caribny View Post
Talk to any black professional man who isn't built like a twink and they will tell you that learning how to be "non threatening" to white men is a vital tool that they need to learn.
In my business, an effective defense mechanism is to align oneself with the biggest, baddest looking dudes possible, which frequently means spending time with big scary black dudes and ~gasp~ actually becoming friends regardless of the ideology of race mongers. I'm with two scary black men right now. Oh the horror!
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Old 12-25-2016, 04:41 AM
 
Location: Staten Island, NY
7,915 posts, read 6,494,962 times
Reputation: 7103
Quote:
Originally Posted by anonimuso View Post
Yes, I am a black professional, and I'm 6'2" and 275 lbs. But NO, I will never learn how to be "non-threatening". I'm confident and big and strong, and if you don't like it, that's because they are weak. And I'm not going to make myself look weak to appease someone else.
And color has nothing to do with it either like this weirdo harps on. Weak people are afraid of anyone who is bigger than them. I know plenty of doophy white galoots who scare people even though they couldn't hurt a kitten if they were actively trying to.
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Old 12-25-2016, 05:05 AM
 
23,275 posts, read 16,124,122 times
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Originally Posted by Airborneguy View Post
In my business, an effective defense mechanism is to align oneself with the biggest, baddest looking dudes possible, which frequently means spending time with big scary black dudes and ~gasp~ actually becoming friends regardless of the ideology of race mongers. I'm with two scary black men right now. Oh the horror!
Well, I'm a 6'2" bearded Black guy. I generally don't have problems with people at my height, and I'm bearded and I wear regular guy clothes (blue jeans, shorts, t-shirts). I know short, effeminate guys who dress flamboyantly and have many more problems with physical violence being directed their way).

So I do look threatening to some, but it saves me from being mugged and it means I can go places by myself all over the world.
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