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I've been using the dating app bumble for a couple of months now, without any success, and so I am trying to decide if it's worth my time to continue to use it or if I should just give up and delete my profile. I would be especially interested to hear from fellow women in their late 20s/early 30s.
Here's what my experience looks like:
I do my best to keep an open mind, and choose men who seem to have similar interests/background to me, and who convey friendliness/warmth/intelligence in their pictures, as opposed to a specific "look". While these criteria eliminate most men, I have found a sufficient number of potential matches at this stage. I would say about half of the men that I swipe right on swipe right on me too.
Where it gets frustrating is the messaging part. While most men do message me back (the way it works on bumble is that women have to initiate contact), their messages hardly carry the conversation forward or help make the move to the next stage. When I send the first message, I always take the time to say or ask something about their profile rather than a generic "hey". Then, they usually just respond to my question, without asking anything in return. This gets uncomfortable quickly, because I begin to feel like I am bothering them with me doing all the question asking. Then, even in the minority of the cases where they actually try to carry a semblance of a conversation with me, it doesn't get to the next stage, i.e. meeting in person, as they never suggest it. The few times I've gotten frustrated and asked them myself if they would be up to meet for coffee or drinks or something, they have just disappeared.
Would be interested to hear about other people's experiences or thoughts!
Since you seem to be genuine, I will be candid with my response. Do men get to see you picture on this service? If so, they may not find you sufficiently attractive to carry on the conversation. Does not mean you are not attractive or pretty, just that the men you have contacted do not see you that way. No biggie, move on.
I was on the apps for a while before I stuck with this current girl. Bumble served me well a good few times. My absolute favorite was this upstate broad. Let me tie her up, blindfold her, gag her. She cut me off after a month or so. I miss her dearly.
Since you seem to be genuine, I will be candid with my response. Do men get to see you picture on this service? If so, they may not find you sufficiently attractive to carry on the conversation. Does not mean you are not attractive or pretty, just that the men you have contacted do not see you that way. No biggie, move on.
Bumble works like Tinder in the sense that a user cannot contact you unless you "match" with them. They have to find her somewhat attractive if they are going to swipe her right to match, otherwise it's just a waste of time. There is a strong emphasis on looks (and skin color) on those apps.
For the OP, you have to be patient with these things. A lot of times people seem to enjoy "collecting" matches, and nothing more. Just keep trying. More often than not, people are just boring. It's the same regurgitated dialogue all of the time.
You can be very creative wth your dialogue; but if the other party is boring and one-note, it will not work.
I wish I could be more helpful, so maybe a woman can chime in here. (I guess being gay is the next closest thing, lol)
I've been using the dating app bumble for a couple of months now, without any success, and so I am trying to decide if it's worth my time to continue to use it or if I should just give up and delete my profile. I would be especially interested to hear from fellow women in their late 20s/early 30s.
Here's what my experience looks like:
I do my best to keep an open mind, and choose men who seem to have similar interests/background to me, and who convey friendliness/warmth/intelligence in their pictures, as opposed to a specific "look". While these criteria eliminate most men, I have found a sufficient number of potential matches at this stage. I would say about half of the men that I swipe right on swipe right on me too.
Where it gets frustrating is the messaging part. While most men do message me back (the way it works on bumble is that women have to initiate contact), their messages hardly carry the conversation forward or help make the move to the next stage. When I send the first message, I always take the time to say or ask something about their profile rather than a generic "hey". Then, they usually just respond to my question, without asking anything in return. This gets uncomfortable quickly, because I begin to feel like I am bothering them with me doing all the question asking. Then, even in the minority of the cases where they actually try to carry a semblance of a conversation with me, it doesn't get to the next stage, i.e. meeting in person, as they never suggest it. The few times I've gotten frustrated and asked them myself if they would be up to meet for coffee or drinks or something, they have just disappeared.
Would be interested to hear about other people's experiences or thoughts!
I never heard of Bumble app until recently. I heard that it is very popular amongst professional women liberal cities like NYC, DC and SF. From what I hear the app is an 80/20 app. That means that around 80 percent of women are only going to find 20% of men attractive, and those 20% of men are cheaters, playing games and or already in a committed relationship. Therefore women on bumble are going to spend a much more harder time finding the ONE. Imagine if 10 women and 10 men are on bumble, and 8 out of 10 women find 1 guy desirable? 8 out of the 10 women will have to compete for that one guy who is attractive, college educated, has a career and so on. An app like this is a total failure. I wish women luck on trying to find commitment out of a man that is so desirable. The dating marketplace in NYC seeps into its own soil at the end of the day.
I never heard of Bumble app until recently. I heard that it is very popular amongst professional women liberal cities like NYC, DC and SF. From what I hear the app is an 80/20 app. That means that around 80 percent of women are only going to find 20% of men attractive, and those 20% of men are cheaters, playing games and or already in a committed relationship. Therefore women on bumble are going to spend a much more harder time finding the ONE. Imagine if 10 women and 10 men are on bumble, and 8 out of 10 women find 1 guy desirable? 8 out of the 10 women will have to compete for that one guy who is attractive, college educated, has a career and so on. An app like this is a total failure. I wish women luck on trying to find commitment out of a man that is so desirable. The dating marketplace in NYC seeps into its own soil at the end of the day.
I found your name really cool! I use a Sabertooth 990fx chipset motherboard. I also have an AMD R9 390x GFX card and an AMD RX460. Both of the fans broke down upon reaching the desktop after 1-2 months of normal use, so the solution was to go into your computers registry edit, look for your graphic card regedit, and then add a command called: TdrDelay, set it to (10), and then click ok. Open the Catalyst control center for manual fan speed set to 100% or download MSI afterburner, set voltage current to always active, and then set fan speed to 100%. Problem solved. I did not need to return my HD's to newegg.
Anyway, as for the dating app, "oriondream" brings up a valid point. Physical appearance at most times paints a thousand (1,000) words, so the best option is to wait for a male that will find you compatible.
Beginning a conversation properly is a step in the right direction. Being compatible is another step, but some people see physical appearances as an even more major step, I suppose. It all depends on the person.
Last edited by Water_Nintendo64; 03-27-2017 at 11:48 AM..
Reason: TdrDelay, not Tdrdelay
Maybe the problem is people are either looking for both of these:
Physical beauty
Career Orientated
Both are superficial in reality, to be successful and driven you have to be selfish and that can and will eventually make a problem unless all you really care about is "status", if you're very attractive chances are you will enjoy playing around with how easy technology/apps make it.
Maybe go for someone who isnt what you consider the hottest and only works at trader joes or something like that and is happy and a wonderful person.
Linda, Bumble isn't for ladies who are seeking a committed long term monogamous relationship.
It's great if you are the do whatever you want, a girl can be the same as a man in the dating world etc. So it's good if you want to take on the masculine energy and attract feminine men who want a woman to chat them up, ask them out etc. This does not a happy relationship make.
You'll have better luck on Tinder. Let your true personality shine through and lean back. Wear a nice decent dress not suggestive in any way (this will discourage f*** boys). Put brief info about what you enjoy doing and personality of who you'll like to meet. (Very very brief). Swipe but don't go chasing anyone. Perhaps 50% will swipe right.
Reply to your messages in a polite way but not flirty or chasing. No endless or late night chatting or chat feasts. Half of that 50% will poof cos you're requiring more investment.
Of the remaining 25% you matched some won't follow through to a 2nd date but keep you eye on the ball. You're looking for quality not quantity.
Eventually you'll be left with the one who didn't need skimpy clothes, flirting, last minute or late night chat feast to stay interested. This is the one that has potential.
Agree to his request for exclusivity if only you feel confident of his feeling for you not simply attraction. Ie he's kind towards you and most people. This is the sort that's likely to be there when you're 70 and can enjoy holding hands and share memories.
Good luck.
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