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Old 07-09-2017, 04:37 PM
 
126 posts, read 97,698 times
Reputation: 40

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I've been living with them for a while now. I do my dishes, take out recycling, etc, except I don't really interact with the two of them.

They kind of have this friendship going on and sometimes hang in the living room, cook meals for each other, talk about their lives. When I get home or cook and see them, I say hi, engage in really short conversation and just go back to my room. I'm an introvert and this sort of thing just gives me a lot of anxiety. I knew a roommate situation wouldn't be ideal for me, but it's the only thing I can afford to do at this point in my life.

The worst part is that I had a financial problem in June, which has led me to ask our landlord to give me a few extra days to pay full rent and she was fine with it, but my roommates are freaking out, even though I've always paid rent on time in the years that I've been here. I overheard them talking about me and one of them was saying "I could pay his share and then he would pay me so we would be OK with the landlord", "Is that going to be hard for you financially?", "Yeah, I guess", "Then **** it, we're only giving him once chance."

It's especially surprising to hear this when one of them has had problems paying rent three times because he didn't have a job and the only reason he's still here is because my other roommate helped him with the rent for 3 months.

I know they're right to be this radical about kicking me out, but I just needed to rant.
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Old 07-09-2017, 07:31 PM
 
Location: Confines of the 101 Precinct
19,223 posts, read 32,730,162 times
Reputation: 7614
Quote:
Originally Posted by jackswastedlife View Post
I've been living with them for a while now. I do my dishes, take out recycling, etc, except I don't really interact with the two of them.

They kind of have this friendship going on and sometimes hang in the living room, cook meals for each other, talk about their lives. When I get home or cook and see them, I say hi, engage in really short conversation and just go back to my room. I'm an introvert and this sort of thing just gives me a lot of anxiety. I knew a roommate situation wouldn't be ideal for me, but it's the only thing I can afford to do at this point in my life.

The worst part is that I had a financial problem in June, which has led me to ask our landlord to give me a few extra days to pay full rent and she was fine with it, but my roommates are freaking out, even though I've always paid rent on time in the years that I've been here. I overheard them talking about me and one of them was saying "I could pay his share and then he would pay me so we would be OK with the landlord", "Is that going to be hard for you financially?", "Yeah, I guess", "Then **** it, we're only giving him once chance."

It's especially surprising to hear this when one of them has had problems paying rent three times because he didn't have a job and the only reason he's still here is because my other roommate helped him with the rent for 3 months.

I know they're right to be this radical about kicking me out, but I just needed to rant.
Anybody is justified to dislike you. Do you guys have parents? sheesh.....
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Old 07-09-2017, 07:35 PM
 
Location: New York, NY
7,589 posts, read 2,703,917 times
Reputation: 2825
Quote:
Originally Posted by SeventhFloor View Post
Anybody is justified to dislike you. Do you guys have parents? sheesh.....
This guy's posts are so depressing. He posts about nothing but how he's an introvert, how anxious it makes him socializing with this roommates and how they socialize with each other but with not him as much. Same threads over and over again. I think we need a therapist for the forums for people like him.

Quote:
Originally Posted by jackswastedlife View Post
I've been living with them for a while now. I do my dishes, take out recycling, etc, except I don't really interact with the two of them.

They kind of have this friendship going on and sometimes hang in the living room, cook meals for each other, talk about their lives. When I get home or cook and see them, I say hi, engage in really short conversation and just go back to my room. I'm an introvert and this sort of thing just gives me a lot of anxiety. I knew a roommate situation wouldn't be ideal for me, but it's the only thing I can afford to do at this point in my life.

The worst part is that I had a financial problem in June, which has led me to ask our landlord to give me a few extra days to pay full rent and she was fine with it, but my roommates are freaking out, even though I've always paid rent on time in the years that I've been here. I overheard them talking about me and one of them was saying "I could pay his share and then he would pay me so we would be OK with the landlord", "Is that going to be hard for you financially?", "Yeah, I guess", "Then **** it, we're only giving him once chance."

It's especially surprising to hear this when one of them has had problems paying rent three times because he didn't have a job and the only reason he's still here is because my other roommate helped him with the rent for 3 months.

I know they're right to be this radical about kicking me out, but I just needed to rant.
Do you have *any* friends? How do you function at work if you're such an introvert? Not that I don't buy it. I just have a hard time understanding how people become so paranoid with interacting with other people. It's really scary. You must be one of the people I see walking around like zombies with their heads buried in their cell phones.
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Old 07-09-2017, 07:39 PM
 
126 posts, read 97,698 times
Reputation: 40
Quote:
Originally Posted by SeventhFloor View Post
Anybody is justified to dislike you. Do you guys have parents? sheesh.....
Anybody's justified to dislike me just because I'm shy? Ok...
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Old 07-09-2017, 07:40 PM
 
35,121 posts, read 37,862,490 times
Reputation: 61846
Quote:
Originally Posted by jackswastedlife View Post
Anybody's justified to dislike me just because I'm shy? Ok...
Don't read more into that statement than what is there. There is not one person on this planet who likes everyone or who will be liked by everyone.
Please consider professional guidance for any issues, soon.
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Old 07-09-2017, 07:40 PM
 
126 posts, read 97,698 times
Reputation: 40
Quote:
Originally Posted by pierrepont7731 View Post

Do you have *any* friends? How do you function at work if you're such an introvert? Not that I don't buy it. I just have a hard time understanding how people become so paranoid with interacting with other people. It's really scary. You must be one of the people I see walking around like zombies with their heads buried in their cell phones.
I do have friends. Trying to explain social anxiety to someone who's an extrovert is kind of pointless sometimes, because in their minds they never grasp how someone can be like that. I don't know what to tell you.
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Old 07-09-2017, 07:44 PM
 
126 posts, read 97,698 times
Reputation: 40
Quote:
Originally Posted by CSD610 View Post
Don't read more into that statement than what is there. There is not one person on this planet who likes everyone or who will be liked by everyone.
Please consider professional guidance for any issues, soon.
I'm aware of that. You're all making me sound like I'm a total weirdo and this is obviously going off-topic, so l'm just going to carry on.
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Old 07-09-2017, 07:48 PM
 
10,626 posts, read 20,759,553 times
Reputation: 8155
It seems like you know the situation is not ideal for you. It's probably not ideal for them either. Oh well, that's life sometimes with roommate situations.

It also seems like you are mixing up two things. One is whether they like you (and so what if they don't -- it's your place as much as theirs, correct?) and the other thing is whether you can pay your rent. If you don't think you're going to have trouble paying rent again, then put it out of your mind. If you do think you'll have trouble...then, maybe it would be best to think about moving out to somewhere cheaper where the roommates also come home and go straight to their room and close their doors.

People are different, so don't feel badly that you don't like to socialize with people you live with. Not everyone likes to, unless they are living with actual friends and then maybe it's different.
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Old 07-09-2017, 07:54 PM
 
Location: New York, NY
7,589 posts, read 2,703,917 times
Reputation: 2825
Quote:
Originally Posted by jackswastedlife View Post
I do have friends. Trying to explain social anxiety to someone who's an extrovert is kind of pointless sometimes, because in their minds they never grasp how someone can be like that. I don't know what to tell you.
I'm not exactly extroverted either but moreso by choice. A lot of people are phony, and I can't be bothered with BS, so for that reason I only stick with a small group of people. I'm also not very trusting of people, so there's that and I will resort to trying to be polite to hold back from saying what's really on my mind, but people take that as me being gullible. However, the only way to deal with your situation is to face it head on. Take small steps and just not think about it. You are not only one that is shy. If you're cool with your friends, then hang out with them more often. There will be situations that are *awkward* for everyone. Just the way it is.
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Old 07-09-2017, 07:59 PM
 
Location: In the heights
20,171 posts, read 21,767,856 times
Reputation: 10254
Either get out of this roommate situation or make overtures to your roommates. They obviously can understand if someone is behind on payments, but it doesn't help if you're so isolated that they can't put their trust in you that you will not jeopardize their own rent situation. At the very least, establish a clear line of communication of where you're at right now. Have you tried telling them about your social anxiety in a non-confrontational manner?
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