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Old 10-19-2011, 08:01 PM
 
1,785 posts, read 2,922,338 times
Reputation: 3061

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Quote:
Originally Posted by itshim View Post
Oh most definately! And I whole heartedly agree with the bolded. Not to make light of it, because I'm sure a lot of these women do feel victimized and that the attention is unwanted to some extent

However, if I said it once I've said it a million times, if no man ever said or looked their way in the street from this day on, a lot of these women would would develop mental/self-esteem issues.

If no man complimented, looked or leered at them while they were on the street, they would think that something was wrong with themselves. I think that this is especially true if they saw other women getting this attention, while they weren't getting any. Like you said, the mere mention attention gives them bragging rights...and I'll even go so far to say that it is a medicine for reassurance that can even see themselves as sexually attractive.
Actually, speaking as a woman, I find it disgusting and degrading. Seriously? Do you want some pig yelling out/smacking lips at YOUR Mom, your wife, your girlfriend? Trust me - it's not a compliment and I'm VERY quick to put a stop to it. I actually don't care if it's Brad Pitt - I do not want to be leered at or slowly looked up and down, or have a suggestive comment thrown at me when I'm trying to get on a subway or walk to an office. I actually question how these animals were raised and if they were taught respect for women in the home. It seriously is not OK. In any sense.

Here's a free lesson for you guys out there: Do you want to be noticed favorably by a woman? Have the woman do a double-take at YOU? It's very easy. Get up out of your seat on the subway or bus and offer the young lady your seat. Or just try to catch her eye and gesture that the seat is hers. In addition to that, learn to stand back and hold a door open for a woman. It may sound old-fashioned, but all of us gals were raised at our mother's knees telling us how "properly raised gentlemen" treat women. In a city where it is rarer and rarer to show deference to a woman, make yourself stand out. And in the process, make your Ma proud.

 
Old 10-19-2011, 08:46 PM
 
801 posts, read 868,414 times
Reputation: 126
I see you conplaining about men looking at you.heres some good reasons ,why you should not think like that!!
1. Are you dressing properly?
2. Do you have any insecuritys?
3. When a men looks at you specially when you say hispanic!! Doesn't mean you are all that!!
4. In cases, is how you act and make others feel about you!
5. The way that you express youreself about man is like you come from the other world of the same sex, (you know what I mean).
6. If that is not the case, than you have a real problem, probably been in another place that you don't know makes you be freak out ,.
Theres more to look before you make any statement, and feel proud that at least you're atrctive to men,a lot of other women's will like to be on that position . I can't cover the sun with my hand , I know theres a lot of sick people around. But don't panic cuz this might get you in a very scary mode. Just keep in watch for how you dress, speak , act .and enjoy you're life!!
 
Old 10-20-2011, 12:11 PM
 
346 posts, read 355,067 times
Reputation: 374
Quote:
Originally Posted by unlvstudent View Post
I don't like to be harassed by anyone, regardless of race. It just so happens the ones who harass me are mostly Hispanic. The majority of the white and black men seem to be more polite and know to not act like that. A black guy told off this ugly little Hispanic man on the subway who yelled a few things at me from across the aisle.

The ugly hispanic man was probably a Mexican hillbilly from Guerrero/Puebla Mexico. I don't know why they look and behave the way they do. Mexican-Americans refer to them as Taquaches, people that live in the mountains and have no mestizo or criollo blood in them.

They are savages, basically.
 
Old 10-20-2011, 12:33 PM
 
669 posts, read 1,036,767 times
Reputation: 368
Quote:
Originally Posted by cokatie View Post
Actually, speaking as a woman, I find it disgusting and degrading. Seriously? Do you want some pig yelling out/smacking lips at YOUR Mom, your wife, your girlfriend? Trust me - it's not a compliment and I'm VERY quick to put a stop to it. I actually don't care if it's Brad Pitt - I do not want to be leered at or slowly looked up and down, or have a suggestive comment thrown at me when I'm trying to get on a subway or walk to an office. I actually question how these animals were raised and if they were taught respect for women in the home. It seriously is not OK. In any sense.

Here's a free lesson for you guys out there: Do you want to be noticed favorably by a woman? Have the woman do a double-take at YOU? It's very easy. Get up out of your seat on the subway or bus and offer the young lady your seat. Or just try to catch her eye and gesture that the seat is hers. In addition to that, learn to stand back and hold a door open for a woman. It may sound old-fashioned, but all of us gals were raised at our mother's knees telling us how "properly raised gentlemen" treat women. In a city where it is rarer and rarer to show deference to a woman, make yourself stand out. And in the process, make your Ma proud.
I never got why woman cared that guys are checking them out. Why would you care if someone thinks your attractive and is just looking at you, I mean most of the time you woman wear clothing to accentuate what ever good physical qualities you have. Who are you doing it for men of course.

Woman need to realize men are very visual creatures when we see a woman who's somewhat attractive we want to see if she has the right attributes that the particular man is into before we make a move to a approach a woman.

And no I wouldn't care if some guy is just staring at my mom, sister, or gf because it's gonna happen anyway.
 
Old 10-20-2011, 01:36 PM
 
1,785 posts, read 2,922,338 times
Reputation: 3061
Quote:
Originally Posted by joshd9124 View Post
I never got why woman cared that guys are checking them out. Why would you care if someone thinks your attractive and is just looking at you, I mean most of the time you woman wear clothing to accentuate what ever good physical qualities you have. Who are you doing it for men of course.

Woman need to realize men are very visual creatures when we see a woman who's somewhat attractive we want to see if she has the right attributes that the particular man is into before we make a move to a approach a woman.

And no I wouldn't care if some guy is just staring at my mom, sister, or gf because it's gonna happen anyway.
OK, Josh, when I get dressed in the morning, I can assure you that the LAST thing on my mind is "Hmmpph, what little number will attract the most men?". I'm a little too busy making sure it's clean, it matches, it's going to be comfortable for the long day ahead - and maybe - just maybe - if it would do in a pinch if I have to go out that evening for a work function". And maybe it's just me, but after 12 years of Catholic school (with the nuns at the helm), I can ASSURE you that my skirt/dress length is very proper. Just training.

The other thing is, we are not discussing the topic of being at a social venue where we're all playing the mating game. The OP, and my post, are discussing walking to a subway or an office, minding our own business when some throw-back from the Cavemen start throwing out LEWD comments, making disgusting smacking noises with their lips and other generally rude sexual comments. Are you really telling me that's OK? And that it's OK if it happens to your Mom, sister or gf? Cause my friend, if that's OK to you, you really were absent for some life training lessons.

I'm walking down a street or a subway platform. I'm checking my watch, I'm going over my schedule in my head, I'm minding my own business and I need to be subjected to this?! WTF? And then, you see, as a native NY'er, these idiots have now put me in a very difficult situation. First of all, I'm probably already cranky (not a morning person) and I really don't like to be the center of attention. I wouldn't say I'm shy - but I don't seek the limelight, so to speak. So now this moron's condescending, degrading actions has created me as the star in the center of "The Latest in the NYC Subway Chronicles".

I'd like to be meek - but you see - a pig like that would then never learn a lesson and he would go on to victimize some other innocent woman. Now, to be honest, and I'm really proud of my city to say this, at this point a gentleman passenger will interject - and coward that the pig is - he will back off. Other times, I've actually had women on the subway jump to my assistance (because we are ALL sick of this). If, however, that does not take place then I need to go all Flatbush on him. And it's not pretty. My look of death is bad enough, but as my Mommy can attest to, my words are like a million little razor cuts. And, as the OP pointed out, if the moron doesn't understand English, doesn't want to look bad in front of his fellow cretins, and smiles inanely at me, then what else is left, I ask you, other than a physical blow that he will not soon forget.

So seriously - behave as you want to women in social venues and take your chances there. However, when we are on a public street or public transport - minding our own business, SHUT your mouth, save the lewd comments for your Mama, and leave us alone. If you find me that freaking attractive, get off at the same stop as me, ask if you can have a word with me, and ask me for coffee/drinks. But do NOT objective me simply because I am a woman "and men are visual beings". Get freaking control of yourself.

Seriously - and then you wonder why these sex crimes/gropings are going up in Queens and Brooklyn! It's because the majority of you that commented on the OP seem to feel it's OK to sexual harass a woman verbally! What's the next stop when these freaking creeps aren't put in their place by the well raised local men I KNOW are out there? They then think it's OK to take it to the next step and grab a woman. Come on guys. Seriously. Stick up for your sisters here. We'll freaking man up if we have to ourselves - but why not take the opportunity yourself?
 
Old 10-20-2011, 02:03 PM
 
Location: Nassau, Long Island, NY
16,416 posts, read 27,941,732 times
Reputation: 7250
Quote:
Originally Posted by unlvstudent View Post
I haven't been in NYC very long (originally from Nevada) but never in my life have I experienced so many creepy men who blatantly stare me up and down, say nasty sexual comments to me, call me names, etc. until I moved here. I'm a pretty attractive, young, blonde girl, which is very common where I'm from, so I assume the guys there are just used to it. But here it's just ridiculous! So is it normal for a female to have 5 foot tall Hispanic men (oh you know what I'm talking about, I see them everywhere. They're all hispanic, short, and creepy. Often seen delivering food.) on the subway staring and whispering at you? To walk past a guy on the street and have him stop and turn around and shout something at you? When I'm walking down the street and see a group of construction workers I know what's coming. I've even had a guy grab my ass on a crowded subway.

Do these men have ANY respect for women?
It's a case of the "third-world villager machismo" attitude. Do they have respect for women? NO. Women are lower-status than men in the communities they come from. They just don't know how to act here.

Personally I have a problem taking "omega manlets" in servant jobs who have to shop for clothes in the children's department and who ride children's bicycles SERIOUSLY when they do this to ME, who towers at least 1/2 foot over them and could probably beat the crap out of them! I wink and give them a wicked, predatory, toothy grin (where the smile does not make it to my eyes) and go on my way. (If one dared put its paws on me, the real predator would come out, but so far they tend to be content with hissing like rabid miniature polecats.) I couldn't care less how they act because they mean absolutely nothing to me. They are absolute zeroes and are only good for delivering a meal to me (and note when they deliver your food they don't act like that to women, as they are simpering for a tip)! In short, who cares? Brush 'em off! They're like goofy little cartoon characters. Can't take 'em anywhere and expect them to behave in a civilized manner!

It could always be worse. To this day (yes, 21st century!) in India, the commuter trains have to have "ladies only" cars or the women would be molested on the train by men as a matter of practice everyday! Google "eve teasing" if you don't believe this could possibly still be accepted practice in the 21st century. Compared to that, the women of NYC have it very good indeed.
 
Old 10-20-2011, 05:46 PM
 
801 posts, read 868,414 times
Reputation: 126
This post went to over the seas!! From pervert to racist. Not a good thing to look like ,. I just can't stand this BS... Of people trying to put down others especially with race. Listen if you don't like any race except of youre kind, than keep walking !!! What makes you so special ?? I believe that CITY DATA FORUM if it doesn't modify this post , than it means, it's not worth it anymore. What is political, race and religion topics should be out!!! Of public discution. To avoid all this non sense stuff. Right BMWGUY??
 
Old 10-20-2011, 07:34 PM
 
Location: Nassau, Long Island, NY
16,416 posts, read 27,941,732 times
Reputation: 7250
Quote:
Originally Posted by hotblue78 View Post
This post went to over the seas!! From pervert to racist. Not a good thing to look like ,. I just can't stand this BS... Of people trying to put down others especially with race. Listen if you don't like any race except of youre kind, than keep walking !!! What makes you so special ?? I believe that CITY DATA FORUM if it doesn't modify this post , than it means, it's not worth it anymore. What is political, race and religion topics should be out!!! Of public discution. To avoid all this non sense stuff. Right BMWGUY??
Nobody is "mad" at anyone or hates anyone on this thread because of RACE.

Us women are mad at the BEHAVIORS we are subjected to. Period.

Do you think we would be happy if the "right" kind of man acted this way? NO! Pure nonsense. The reason being: ANY kind of man who acts this way is a CREEP, pure and simple!

Now I admit my post was a little rough and mean, BUT who started it? I didn't start it. The hissing little omega manlets did. And I admit I can be MEAN as a snake when someone messes with me. Let's look at it from their point of view, shall we? I suppose it's OKAY for them to look at me, an American female (minding my own business and NOT bothering them), as some sort of "loose woman" to be sexually harassed and disrespected, right? What else would their behavior come from but a mindset like that? But God forbid I despise them back! And I'll go a little farther, there are a lot of American women who act like stupid w ho res so I can even see how they come to NY and think this way. If they were exposed to "Sex and the City" ... forget about it! They probably think all NY women are running around tearing off strange men's pants and giving blowjobs when they're not in a materialistic shopping frenzy. I don't like the stereotype and I don't like it when it affects me and I get the "hissy hissys" ... but I see where it came from. As for do I hate all central american/mexican men ... Do you think I ride the trains with a hatchet just waiting to hack one up? NO! I only hate the ones who act like morons to me. I have no problem with the ones who mind their own business and act normal.

As for my comment on India, well it is TRUE. It is facts as to what is going on and how perhaps, just perhaps, we do have it better here on the trains in NYC and we can look at the bright side. What other things are we not allowed to talk about according to you? I'm curious why didn't you call out this person for being "racist" in his post:

http://www.city-data.com/forum/21332661-post9.html

I mean that's not racist in your book for him to speak what he states is the truth, but God forbid WOMEN fight back against their aggressors by speaking the TRUTH OF THEIR EXPERIENCES ... that is construed as racist? It makes no sense unless you are operating on a double standard.
 
Old 10-20-2011, 07:46 PM
 
9,316 posts, read 13,856,052 times
Reputation: 9365
Quote:
Originally Posted by I_Love_LI_but View Post
Do you think we would be happy if the "right" kind of man acted this way?
Long observation suggests the answer is "yes"; most women aren't universally opposed to wolfish behavior, only to wolfish behavior from men they aren't attracted to. That is, if it was Brad Pitt checking out their butt, most women would feel flattered rather than creeped out.

Quote:
Now I admit my post was a little rough and mean, BUT who started it? I didn't start it. The hissing little omega manlets did.
Ah, you may be one of the exceptions... "hissing little omega manlet" is the kind of language usually used by women who hate ALL men, and thus the distinction between men does not apply.
 
Old 10-20-2011, 09:01 PM
 
Location: 20 years from now
5,073 posts, read 5,420,166 times
Reputation: 3134
cokatie
Quote:
Actually, speaking as a woman, I find it disgusting and degrading. Seriously? Do you want some pig yelling out/smacking lips at YOUR Mom, your wife, your girlfriend? Trust me - it's not a compliment and I'm VERY quick to put a stop to it. I actually don't care if it's Brad Pitt - I do not want to be leered at or slowly looked up and down, or have a suggestive comment thrown at me when I'm trying to get on a subway or walk to an office.
I wasn't condoning anyone making lewd comments, "pigs yelling" or "lips smacking." My comment was more so in reference to the women who complain about being approached by men on the street. Personal experience has shown me that as long as the man is attractive to the woman he is approaching--she is fine with being approached in an appropriate manner. She'll only find it unacceptable under any circumstance when she doesn't find him attractive at all.


Quote:
Here's a free lesson for you guys out there: Do you want to be noticed favorably by a woman? Have the woman do a double-take at YOU? It's very easy. Get up out of your seat on the subway or bus and offer the young lady your seat.
LOL translation: become a personal doormat for any and every woman that they come across and maybe if they take enough pity on you, they'll give you the time of day.

Truth be told, if these men weren't out there taking chances by making "hissing" and "kissing" sounds, many of you would have never been born.
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