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The eucational system is broken, but I think a huge part of the problem is the "broken familes" item on your list.
People are letting "society" raise their kids.
I see mothers around where I live cussing and screaming at their kids, I have seen several kids get smacked, I am talking young kids.
There are kids that grow up poor and make it, and I would bet a lot of it has to do with what type of structure they have going on at home.
True.
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Most screwed up kids come from screwed up parents, whether rich or poor. And screwed up parents rely on societal institutions like teachers and social workers to raise their kids because they are incapable.
Guess what? If you rely on institutions to raise your kids, they will end up in adult institutions called prison or welfare.
The difference is that Kid A's parents will bust his butt and set him straight, while Kid B's parents are apathetic throughout his life. Kid A's parents have standards and expectations for him since day 1.
Kid B's mom was a 14 year girl, who at age 30 still doesn't know any better, and thought it was a good idea to have unprotected sex with one of the neighborhood thugs and have his baby. Kid B's dad could care less about his kid, which may or may not really be his, and is either in jail or totally disappeared.
I've got to tell you that the scenario you painted is unfortunately true in many instances. It's like a cycle that moves along uninterrupted from one generation to another with the inevitable consequences of poverty, despair, broken homes, lack of discipline, proper role model. I guess that's why some liberals and others have started the mantra that "it takes a village to raise a child." Okay, we can be our brother's keeper - as awesome a responsibility as that is - but the deck is stacked against that kid from day one.
However, I do want to concede Desi's point that it is strikingly unfair and inequitable for a suburban kid who commits the same violation as a kid from the ghetto to be treated with kids' gloves. Let's try to advocate moral and family responsibility to people who don't practice it as well as level the playing field and not apply a social class form of reprimand and justice dependant on whether one is from a middle class suburb or an inner city environment.
The difference is that Kid A's parents will bust his butt and set him straight, while Kid B's parents are apathetic throughout his life. Kid A's parents have standards and expectations for him since day 1.
Kid B's mom was a 14 year girl, who at age 30 still doesn't know any better, and thought it was a good idea to have unprotected sex with one of the neighborhood thugs and have his baby. Kid B's dad could care less about his kid, which may or may not really be his, and is either in jail or totally disappeared.
Interesting, I suppose its possible, but, just as likely is the following (which I also saw often.)
Kid A's parents care less about their kid as they are over in Europe half the time. Kid A is spoiled and accustomed to buying his way out of responsibility. Kid A is neglected by his father who is always out on business so he acts up and self medicates since he grew up without affection, raised primarily by the nanny when young, and or boarding school from middle school or older, maybe Choate or Exeter? maybe Phillips? His parents are married, mother drinks all day long at home and taking valium, and singing to herself by th poolside, while the father cheats with the secretaries. She hates her husband and married him only for the money, and won't divorce him for the prenuptial. Kid A uses drugs as a cry for help, is depressed, and money still leaves him feeling empty. He is never caught because his father is powerful, and has influence, and Their home is gated, in a private community where cops don't patrol anyways.
Kid B, born in the United States to Cuban immigrants that barely speak english, mom works as a maid, father cleans toilets at a large clothing department store. They can only afford to live in the poorest area of the inner-city. Both parents have been married since she was 19 and he 23, both are devout catholics, attend mass every sunday, and never forget their rosary. Kid B is generally a good kid, but not perfect, and one of his best friends that he grew up with talks him into going out drinking. Kid B is young, maybe a bit naive and still making his way through adolescence and decides to try it out, maybe even likes it and trys again the next weekend to fit in socially with the cute girls that like the guy who takes risks and acts "mature". Kid B screws up once, and with the wrong cop, his life can be ruined forever.
I suspect you'd agree that this is just as common?
I've got to tell you that the scenario you painted is unfortunately true in many instances. It's like a cycle that moves along uninterrupted from one generation to another with the inevitable consequences of poverty, despair, broken homes, lack of discipline, proper role model. I guess that's why some liberals and others have started the mantra that "it takes a village to raise a child." Okay, we can be our brother's keeper - as awesome a responsibility as that is - but the deck is stacked against that kid from day one.
However, I do want to concede Desi's point that it is strikingly unfair and inequitable for a suburban kid who commits the same violation as a kid from the ghetto to be treated with kids' gloves. Let's try to advocate moral and family responsibility to people who don't practice it as well as level the playing field and not apply a social class form of reprimand and justice dependant on whether one is from a middle class suburb or an inner city environment.
I would say the NYC police and community are a lot more tolerant of petty crime.
A group of little buggers once threw a newspaper at me and I gave chase. The cops came around and said, "They ran off into the projects, there's nothing we can do." I doubt cops in say, Scarsdale, would just shrug their shoulders and give up. More likely, they'd put some effort into it, drag the buggers to their parents and give them a lecture, and their parents wouldn't give any lip back.
Interesting, I suppose its possible, but, just as likely is the following (which I also saw often.)
Kid A's parents care less about their kid as they are over in Europe half the time. Kid A is spoiled and accustomed to buying his way out of responsibility. Kid A is neglected by his father who is always out on business so he acts up and self medicates since he grew up without affection, raised primarily by the nanny when young, and or boarding school from middle school or older, maybe Choate or Exeter? maybe Phillips? His parents are married, mother drinks all day long at home and taking valium, and singing to herself by th poolside, while the father cheats with the secretaries. She hates her husband and married him only for the money, and won't divorce him for the prenuptial. Kid A uses drugs as a cry for help, is depressed, and money still leaves him feeling empty. He is never caught because his father is powerful, and has influence, and Their home is gated, in a private community where cops don't patrol anyways.
Kid B, born in the United States to Cuban immigrants that barely speak english, mom works as a maid, father cleans toilets at a large clothing department store. They can only afford to live in the poorest area of the inner-city. Both parents have been married since she was 19 and he 23, both are devout catholics, attend mass every sunday, and never forget their rosary. Kid B is generally a good kid, but not perfect, and one of his best friends that he grew up with talks him into going out drinking. Kid B is young, maybe a bit naive and still making his way through adolescence and decides to try it out, maybe even likes it and trys again the next weekend to fit in socially with the cute girls that like the guy who takes risks and acts "mature". Kid B screws up once, and with the wrong cop, his life can be ruined forever.
I suspect you'd agree that this is just as common?
Your new Kid A / Kid B scenario is not as common as the one I described. The majority of kids in the burbs are not wealthy, drug popping kids crying out for daddy's love. And the majority of inner-city kids who drink do not have their lives ruined by a cop.
FYI, one of my friend's (white, immigrant) Brooklyn pot head kid was ARRESTED for a fake ID and spent the night in jail. As a result, is he out robbing bodegas, cutting up coke, and impregnating 14 year old hoochie mammas and leaving his spawn in the care of public school teachers? No, he's in college.
I worry about this next generation sometimes. Especially the violent gangs that seem even stronger the last few years.
Gangs are getting LESS violent, not more violent. They don't want cops on their tails, and violence leads to cops spraying down certain blocks which is bad for business. That's not to say that all gangs or gang members are exempt from this, but a lot of them are coming to realize these things.
Interesting, I suppose its possible, but, just as likely is the following (which I also saw often.)
Kid A's parents care less about their kid as they are over in Europe half the time. Kid A is spoiled and accustomed to buying his way out of responsibility. Kid A is neglected by his father who is always out on business so he acts up and self medicates since he grew up without affection, raised primarily by the nanny when young, and or boarding school from middle school or older, maybe Choate or Exeter? maybe Phillips? His parents are married, mother drinks all day long at home and taking valium, and singing to herself by th poolside, while the father cheats with the secretaries. She hates her husband and married him only for the money, and won't divorce him for the prenuptial. Kid A uses drugs as a cry for help, is depressed, and money still leaves him feeling empty. He is never caught because his father is powerful, and has influence, and Their home is gated, in a private community where cops don't patrol anyways.
Kid B, born in the United States to Cuban immigrants that barely speak english, mom works as a maid, father cleans toilets at a large clothing department store. They can only afford to live in the poorest area of the inner-city. Both parents have been married since she was 19 and he 23, both are devout catholics, attend mass every sunday, and never forget their rosary. Kid B is generally a good kid, but not perfect, and one of his best friends that he grew up with talks him into going out drinking. Kid B is young, maybe a bit naive and still making his way through adolescence and decides to try it out, maybe even likes it and trys again the next weekend to fit in socially with the cute girls that like the guy who takes risks and acts "mature". Kid B screws up once, and with the wrong cop, his life can be ruined forever.
I suspect you'd agree that this is just as common?
Let's continue your anecdote about Kid A. Kid A grows up to become a Wall Street exec, pilfers investments from unwitting investors, manipluates/deals/wheels with people's life savings, junk bonds, insider trading, illegal forms of shorting the market, and consequently is led away one day in handcuffs to join Milken and others in the hall of infamy and shame.
See, Kid A might not be representative of the average suburban kid but your Kid A could easily follow the trend I just described.
Now regarding your Kid B, unfortunately that scenario is more prevalent among immigrant families. Many inner city native born kids and families from the hood fit the attributes which Ace mentioned.
I think that in the final analysis, we do need more moral responsibilty from families of both Kid A and Kid B or we're going to suffer severe consequences as a society. However, the prevalence of the vicious cycle leading to poverty, crime, broken homes, dysfunction that impact huge swaths of entire neighborhoods is more devastating for Kid B's situation, in my humble opinion.
Even if society is part of the issue, jax, let's not absolve criminals for their share or responsibility. Sure, broken homes, poverty, churches/synagogues, schools, and the individual are part of the cause as well as the solution.
And I can never figure out why if someone needs to rob, e.g., a defenseless store owner and succeeds in cleaning him/her out, is it society's fault that the fleeing, heavily laden with boot perpetrator then turns around and fills the cowering proprietor with lead?
trinitarios wear green 1st of all pattia!! tu lo abe 227 and netas wear white more than us.. we wear green black whit and red whit blue green beads 7's ^ everything else down
trinitarios wear green 1st of all pattia!! tu lo abe 227 and netas wear white more than us.. we wear green black whit and red whit blue green beads 7's ^ everything else down
Only gangbangers would know what that meant. What is a pattia?
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