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I think its a mixed bag. NYC is one of the most busiest cities with people so involved in work that they're caught up in their own stuff all the time rushing to get from A to B. But I know when I see tourists looking for directions or if one asks me I'll take the time to tell them how to go from A to B. And when I hold the door open for someone I usually get a thanks...no more or less than other places. In fact I feel where I am in Jersey people can be more rude sometimes lol...its all relative to what you're used to really. Everytime I visit family in Florida, just about EVERYONE is nice and smiling...but of course thats where I go in Florida.
...its all relative to what you're used to really.
I completely agree with your post. It's not that NYers are rude, its just that there are so many people, going different directions, often with a deadline, that there isn't the time to be smiley and saying hello to every single person. Instead of a "stop, smile, say thank you." when someone holds a door open, you'll get a sideways smile and a quick "thanks". But the person is not less thankful.
It's a different kind of nice. One memory that stands out in my mind was a woman on the subway who unknowingly dropped her wallet out of her purse on the train. She got up to leave the train and about 4 people called out to her about her wallet. I've seen many incidents like that, and acts of random kindness and generosity. Once I saw a person dressed as a homeless woman putting money IN people's bags!
I actually prefer the "New York Nice" because it's real. I don't like areas of the country where the niceties are a formality or seem forced, I prefer it raw and from the heart.
There was an older generation that was known for being brusque and pushy, but they've either died or moved to Florida. I think it came from growing up in extremely crowded conditions with little or no personal space. Boomer and post-Boomer generations grew up very differently.
In the 80s I remember seeing people who would make a scene at the slightest provocation, like the deli guy putting too much milk is the coffee, etc. I don't see at that anymore, or at least very rarely. That sort of behavior has gone the way of the New York accent, at least in Manhattan.
I haven't been to the city yet but I have heard different accounts. Tell me New York people, what has been your experience??
Best strategy: when people say things--and they most certainly will, if the subject is New York City--take 'em with a grain of salt. Maybe even two grains.
I think NYers get a bad wrap. They aren't rude unless you provoke it. Most are willing to help and are friendly once you warm them up. They won't talk crap and then say "bless his heart" like most southerners do.
The only thing that bothers me about NYC, well Queens, is that the drivers honk their horns like crazy and mostly for no reason! A simple "honk honk" isn't enough for them. They have to carry it on for what seems like 30 seconds!
People are willing to help if you are lost which is great but, in general, people are rude. People walk down the middle of the street and won't move or walk on the wrong side of the street or staircase. They let their dogs pee and crap in the middle of the sidewalk. Most cashiers don't even tell you what you owe, much less look you in the eye or thank you. And using the example above - if telling someone they dropped their wallet is considered a remarkable act of human kindness - you're living among really rude people.
Statements like these are so annoying. How can you categorize all New Yorkers by such a statement? Some people in this world are rude. Some people in this world are not rude. Where you are raised does not pre-determine your attitude. It just doesn't. People are all over these boards battling this statement back and forth. Some people start threads that say, why does everyone say New Yorkers are rude, I went there for the first time and they are so nice and helpful! And then others start them by saying they got the cold shoulder from a random person or whatever. Obviously, it IS a mixed bag because saying something like New Yorkers are rude is such a preposterous comment to begin with!! Why are we discussing this, again?
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