Anyone RETURN North only to consider going BACK South again? (New York: crime, cheap house)

[averagenyjoe]

Here's a new twist. With all the folks that are trying to get out of the South and return North, like I have finally done, Are there any of you that are back North and have tried like heck to get established only to find that it is almost impossible to overcome the cost of living for the LOW wages companies are paying here in Upstate? Add to that the shear frustration and lack of pride people have up here and you cant blame anyone because you forgot what a "survival game" it is to just stay alive and hold on to hope and joy???? That New Yorkers are the best in the world but have short fuses when we cross each other wrong and find that your own temper has its limits???

And after this and all the other things most of you could add and know what I'm talking about are just now considering going BACK South??? because a person really does need HOPE & OPPORTUNITY. Gee Whizz, I love NY but the place is breaking my heart and I want the best life for my kids.

[I'minformed2]

Consider which you disliked more....living in the south, or living in NY. Were you happier here or there? Don't think about which one makes more "sense"...think about which makes you happier.

[Muggy]

I spent my early 20's as a nomad and then moved back to Roc for 2 years and then left for Florida in 05. It's very simple: if my wife and I could both take our jobs to Rochester, Syracuse or the Finger Lakes we would.

Sure, I dislike Florida for some typical reasons (lack of planning, road rage, crappy houses etc.) but the main driving force is opportunity. Being stable in Rochester is amazing, but I've found that hard to come by. I've disagreed with other posters here before, but most of my graduating class does not live in the Rochester area and cannot find comparable jobs. Add to all of that, I have friends whose parents keep getting laid off from Xerox and Kodak. It's sad.

[BillsMan]

No, can't say I ever want to move where the "official" (yeah, I know there's no official language) language isn't English, sorry but too many illegals, pollution, lack of a good education system for grade schoolers, traffic, high cost of housing, drug trafficing, graffiti, lack of pride in home ownership and crime for me. Thats after living in Phoenix for 22 years, moved there when I was 21, I'm back in WNY and I'm loving it.

[averagenyjoe]

Originally Posted by I'minformed2

Consider which you disliked more....living in the south, or living in NY. Were you happier here or there? Don't think about which one makes more "sense"...think about which makes you happier.

Last night during the evening and while I was laying in bed I tried to FULLY project myself being back in Carolina. Driving through the streets & highways, I entered into parking lots, I drove into work, I walked outside to play with my son and felt the heat cooking me from the inside out and dashed back indoors, and basically went through my daily routines in my mind and this really did help bring me back to reality. Not just the logistics of daily life but many other reasons I left. Some of which BillsMan described. Maybe I'm at the point of reckoning where I need to make amends in my heart not to HATE the south but to appreciate it for what it is and move on. I told my wife dont get me wrong I LOVE NY. With a passion!!!! and I really want to stay.

Problem. I just fulfilled a year long temporary assignment and now have been out of work for 6 weeks. Just as when I came up, It was murder trying to find work that pays anything respectable. Ad after ad says 4 yr degree with min 5-10 yrs exp. in my field..... 10.50-13.00/hr. I have all the exp. necessary and perform well in interviews and they stick HARD to their pay. 40K/yr is a normal "starting" wage for what I have done during my years in Carolina. I hear the voices that say.. "got to take whats there" and I agree but for the sake of developing a patchwork quilt resume, that can be risky. Lack of good employment really takes its toll on your emotions and your very soul. Cost of living / wage ratio is seriously out of whack up here. I'm going to continue fighting hard for now and continue playing the "projection" game to help me. But God himself is going to need to help me. I think he knows about NY issues. Thanks y'all. :-)

[hjlacey]

Have you considered East Tennessee? Just moved down and am loving every second! Still in the mountains and only a bit warmer than Orange County NY

[averagenyjoe]

Originally Posted by hjlacey

Have you considered East Tennessee? Just moved down and am loving every second! Still in the mountains and only a bit warmer than Orange County NY

Actually, I have had 2 offers for jobs and even a cheap house to stay in untill I get situated. From several friends I have in the Morristown area. Yes, I like TN very much and even considered it briefly. But decided to visit and then get out. Really though, aside from my friends there, I really dont have alot of interest in anything other than one of the two places I have spent most of my life. 23 yrs in NC and 23 yrs in NY. I guess I am just not into the adventure at my age of starting something new. Absolutely nothing wrong with TN. I guess it comes down to what iminformed says and that is not to decide too much on what makes sense but where you really want to be. I really want to be in NY but honestly something just has to give. I do think it is possible to make it here but not without alot, ALOT of distress. Especially if you are starting over at 46 yrs old after being gone for 23 yrs. Hope that makes sense.

[itSmellsBAD]

Originally Posted by averagenyjoe

Here's a new twist. With all the folks that are trying to get out of the South and return North, like I have finally done, Are there any of you that are back North and have tried like heck to get established only to find that it is almost impossible to overcome the cost of living for the LOW wages companies are paying here in Upstate? Add to that the shear frustration and lack of pride people have up here and you cant blame anyone because you forgot what a "survival game" it is to just stay alive and hold on to hope and joy???? That New Yorkers are the best in the world but have short fuses when we cross each other wrong and find that your own temper has its limits???

And after this and all the other things most of you could add and know what I'm talking about are just now considering going BACK South??? because a person really does need HOPE & OPPORTUNITY. Gee Whizz, I love NY but the place is breaking my heart and I want the best life for my kids.

Lived in Florida twice in the past 20 years. Came back to WNY area in the late 80's only to leave again. Figured it HAS to get better. Came back in 2001 and it's gotten nothing but worse. Taxes are skyrocketing, especially school taxes which are insane. Almost ALL my neighbors work for some type of government, either a school system, corrections officers, speech therapist ($100K for a PART TIME JOB in NYS) or some type of industry that supports government. NY is more socialist than Europe! Massive unemployment, government is by far the largest employer, every single town and village has its own police dept, highway dept, garbage dept, etc. Go anywhere but here.

[smalltownusa]

Originally Posted by itSmellsBAD

Lived in Florida twice in the past 20 years. Came back to WNY area in the late 80's only to leave again. Figured it HAS to get better. Came back in 2001 and it's gotten nothing but worse. Taxes are skyrocketing, especially school taxes which are insane. Almost ALL my neighbors work for some type of government, either a school system, corrections officers, speech therapist ($100K for a PART TIME JOB in NYS) or some type of industry that supports government. NY is more socialist than Europe! Massive unemployment, government is by far the largest employer, every single town and village has its own police dept, highway dept, garbage dept, etc. Go anywhere but here.

Why do you keep coming back? Truly curious as the consensus for most exiters is once out of NY, life is worth living And you came back not once but twice.....wow

[Hillsidelover]

Consider a place like Hillside, NJ it's a small town and it's close to NY, it's the former hometown of Phil Rizzuto. Homes here are also quite affordable.

Originally Posted by averagenyjoe

Here's a new twist. With all the folks that are trying to get out of the South and return North, like I have finally done, Are there any of you that are back North and have tried like heck to get established only to find that it is almost impossible to overcome the cost of living for the LOW wages companies are paying here in Upstate? Add to that the shear frustration and lack of pride people have up here and you cant blame anyone because you forgot what a "survival game" it is to just stay alive and hold on to hope and joy???? That New Yorkers are the best in the world but have short fuses when we cross each other wrong and find that your own temper has its limits???

And after this and all the other things most of you could add and know what I'm talking about are just now considering going BACK South??? because a person really does need HOPE & OPPORTUNITY. Gee Whizz, I love NY but the place is breaking my heart and I want the best life for my kids.