Warnings of moving to the south (Brentwood, Dix: wedding, to live, friendly)

[hew2a]

I firmly believe "Ignorance is where you find it". I, myself am from the South...Nashville. I plan to move to Brooklyn in a year. I love NYC. I've met beautiful people there. And as crazy as it sounds, I don't think the city is that rude. It's just a different way of life. But my dad, having lived in LI for 15yrs hates it. Says he wants no part of New York ever again.

I find myself constantly trying to dispell many Southerners feelings about the North. Thinking they're just jaded. But I truly believe it's just lack of knowledge (aka ignorance) on both parts. I mean some of the things I'm seeing people on here saying is straight up HILARIOUS!!! I can tell you're getting your information from here say. If I had took my dads advice about NYC, I'd never have felt the way I feel today. But there are people on here who have been to places whose name alone would keep me from EVER visiting. Yet you've boiled the entire south down to your experience in "Hang 'em High County, North Carolina". I mean get real! You probably had no business there any way. Just like me, a black man, has no business in some of the Italian neighborhoods in Brooklyn, or wherever.

Yeah, the South is religious. SO WHAT! No one here shoves it down anyone's throat. Just like when I move to Brooklyn, as a Christian, I'll probably be the minority, but I'm not in fear. Although I probably should be. Because form the sound of it, there are people on here who view it as being part of some terrorist organization.

When I visit family in Hartford, CT I am in utter SHOCK at how segregated it is. I mean I subscribed to the lie. I use to think..."but this is the North. You guys are forward thinking. The south is the one that's segregated. Not the North". Only to discover it was worse than home. I mean yeah, there's racism here, but dag...you guys got it too. So don't front like you got it so together.

I love the east coast and the diversity and progressiveness you posses...but straight up ignorance is ignorance. It lives up north just as much as it does down South. It just wears a different hat. So don't front like you're going back up North to some utopia. Because I, nor my family and friends who live there have seen it.

[THASPECIAL]

This goes to hew2a....I am also a Christian and feel the same way as you about us being cast as terrorists......i agree with there being ignorance on both sides, but i speak from experience when talking about the "majority" of New Yorkers....


I have lived in Miami and Orlando which both have tons of people claiming to be born and raised in New York and my experiences tell me that they always find the negative about the south and always say stuff like out ghetto is tougher then the south could even imagine or stuff like oh, thats not "real" pizza.....

it just gets boring after a while of listening to all of that and it makes you not want to visit there. I moved from Miami to Nashville and hated it in the beginning because i had it in my mind before i got there that it was too slow and racist and rednecks and that i hate it.....



well after a couple years being there and telling people from Nashville how much better Miami was and we had this or that and after all of that hate i had made me sick i had to reteach my mind that i needed to look at the positives and enjoy where i was at because if you dont enjoy everyday then you live in negativity which really poisons your mind....so i opened my eyes and started seeing things about Nashville that i love.....


i recently visited there again cuz i moved to Orlando and when i was there i realized that i do miss things about it .....Now all New yorkers are trying to do is put you in thier life and make you see and feel what they saw in thier life iN new york, but guess what that wont happen because we've never been there so its a waste of energy explaining why you are better and you'll get yourself sick always critisizing stuff around you...i already learned that.....


i usually hear positive things from every southerner that i meet that goes to visit New York and they dont seem to put it down but we do talk about the differences in each type of people when we are talking together as southerners...some are good ole boys and are ignorant then some are just like you new yorkers who point things out about the south but you take offense because you cant believe someone would say that about New York....


well i here negativity all the time down here in Orlando about how there's nothing to do and it comes from most New yorkers that live here.......sorry this is so long.....just wish the ones who lived here would stop and try to create a better enviroment in thier own world with the path they are in ....in this life....it will ease the tensions

[mhogan10010]

Originally Posted by hew2a

I firmly believe "Ignorance is where you find it". I, myself am from the South...Nashville. I plan to move to Brooklyn in a year. I love NYC. I've met beautiful people there. And as crazy as it sounds, I don't think the city is that rude. It's just a different way of life. But my dad, having lived in LI for 15yrs hates it. Says he wants no part of New York ever again.

I find myself constantly trying to dispell many Southerners feelings about the North. Thinking they're just jaded. But I truly believe it's just lack of knowledge (aka ignorance) on both parts. I mean some of the things I'm seeing people on here saying is straight up HILARIOUS!!! I can tell you're getting your information from here say. If I had took my dads advice about NYC, I'd never have felt the way I feel today. But there are people on here who have been to places whose name alone would keep me from EVER visiting. Yet you've boiled the entire south down to your experience in "Hang 'em High County, North Carolina". I mean get real! You probably had no business there any way. Just like me, a black man, has no business in some of the Italian neighborhoods in Brooklyn, or wherever.

Yeah, the South is religious. SO WHAT! No one here shoves it down anyone's throat. Just like when I move to Brooklyn, as a Christian, I'll probably be the minority, but I'm not in fear. Although I probably should be. Because form the sound of it, there are people on here who view it as being part of some terrorist organization.

When I visit family in Hartford, CT I am in utter SHOCK at how segregated it is. I mean I subscribed to the lie. I use to think..."but this is the North. You guys are forward thinking. The south is the one that's segregated. Not the North". Only to discover it was worse than home. I mean yeah, there's racism here, but dag...you guys got it too. So don't front like you got it so together.

I love the east coast and the diversity and progressiveness you posses...but straight up ignorance is ignorance. It lives up north just as much as it does down South. It just wears a different hat. So don't front like you're going back up North to some utopia. Because I, nor my family and friends who live there have seen it.

I went to college in Nashville. In fact I was there over memorial day weekend to visit my best friend who lives there. Now in Brooklyn.
Where in Brooklyn are you moving?

[hew2a]

Originally Posted by mhogan10010

I went to college in Nashville. In fact I was there over memorial day weekend to visit my best friend who lives there. Now in Brooklyn.
Where in Brooklyn are you moving?

(I know this is for another post...but anyways) Not exactly sure. I have friends that live there, and I hear a lot of different things. I would love to live in Harlem (UWS) but my girlfriend fell in love with Brooklyn and I dig it too. So alive! I love Park Slope and Williamsburg. But I know my girlfriend and I won't be able to swing that. I was told that I should check out Park Slope, Fort Greene, and Red Hook. Some friends also put me on to Ditmas Park and Windsor Terrace saying they were some up and coming spots. But honestly I'm still kinda in the grey. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

I'd really like to get a better idea of where I need to be focusing. I'm a Graphic Designer/Painter and my girlfriend, soon-to-be wife, is in IT/Administration. Just trying to live comfortably and maybe do a little Grad study. Any advice or insight would be truly appreciated.

Where did you go to school in Nashville?

[mhogan10010]

hew2a

My wife and I were in Manhattan for 6 1/2 year, but had to move due to the sale of our building (a very New York problem). We initially looked in Harlem, but with the gentrification taking place there it was more than we wanted to spend. So, we moved to Park Slope. Actually at the edge of the Slope across 4th Ave, from Borem Hill. Still a little edgy, but with high rise Condos going up everywhere. Priced out after the first year. Moved further out along the same Subway line to Bay Ridge and am saving 700 a month in rent.

The prices in South Brooklyn are where Manhattan was 2 or 3 years ago. So, Park Slope, Williamsburg, Fort Greene, Carroll Gardens, Cobble Hill and even Borem Hill and Red Hook have gotten very hip and expensive. We looked at Windsor Terrace and Kensington. Windsor Terrace is definitely up and coming and somewhere I would look. Kensington is definitely up and coming, but is very residential - little street life.
Red Hook is a nightmare as far as transportation. No Subway lines at all. Bus then subway (something to avoid if you can).
We absolutely love Bay Ridge. A little far out, but more affordable and already developed, so not as likely to explode like other sections of Brooklyn.
Commute to Midtown for work is about 30-40 minutes. Great shopping and restaurants.
I don't care what anyone tells you, avoid East New York Brooklyn, and Crown Heights. Bed Stuy is gentrifying and safer than it has been in decades.
I went to a small Christian College, to study for the ministry. You wouldn't know it but it was right on West End Avenue, down from Vandy.
PM me if you have other questions.
Good luck. Best move I ever made was coming to NYC.

[Yankee Doodle]

Originally Posted by Joe L

I'm born in Brooklyn and could never live in the south, every place I went I got attitude. Was in Charlotte and Columbia SC 2 weeks. They knew I'm from New York, all the saying prayers before eating "you must be a Catholic" etc.
It was nuts.
.....the fresh Grits and corndogs were good.

-Joe

ur right iam a brooklyn born and its the same for me cause of my accent its too thick they say i give my speech a type of rude sound, i live in Texas now it aint so bad but there are a lot of backstabbers.

[mhogan10010]

Originally Posted by Brooklynbiatch

ur right iam a brooklyn born and its the same for me cause of my accent its too thick they say i give my speech a type of rude sound, i live in Texas now it aint so bad but there are a lot of backstabbers.

Growing up in Detroit, the people were nice, but direct.
During my 17 year sojourn in the South, I was constantly mystified by the layers of communication. There was what they said, the way they said it and what they actually meant.
I had to learn that you had better take everything with a grain of salt. While that it true to some extent in most places, it is really the rule of thumb in the South.

[hew2a]

I must say...that is a good point.

Never really thought about it until you mentioned it. Yeah, I think that is one of the things I appreciate about Northerners is that you can pretty much tell (if they don't tell you flat out) if they like you or not. But I'm sure that "layer of communication stuff is there too". My friend who moved here from New Jersey said he and his wife are always in awe when people here say "Let's do lunch or dinner"...and actually mean it.

I love thick Brooklyn accents by the way... : -)

[mhogan10010]

hew2a

Don't know if I mentioned that I was a minister while down south. It took me years to realize that when I visited a church member, if they said, "Don't ya'll leave now, can't you stay longer," they really didn't mean it. It was just kind a social expectation to say that. I had to learn to walk out over their protests and know that I was doing the right thing. I know this because after I overstayed my welcome at a place, with them begging me to stay longer, I was politely told by one of the deacons that I had stayed too long. "that preacher won't ever go home"
People are funny.

[ClarkStreetKid]

Two about Richmond that happened 20 years ago.

A Damn Yankee, remember this was still old Richmond, bought a house in a older neighborhood. As his family was moving in several neighbors came over to say hi, and one invited them to stop in anytime for dinner. Well that evening he did much to the shock of the friendly neighbor who sputtered for a few seconds before slamming the door shut.
Another happened to my brother in-law who bought a home in the exclusive River Road area of Richmond. Well about 8 months later the original owners knock on the door and very politely ask if they can have their house back for the original selling price, of course he politely said no. Two days later several neighbors came by to politely ask why he wouldn't sell the house back to the original owner since it was his house first. Needless to say he never was very welcome in that neighborhood even though everyone remained polite.

To be honest we found these incidents to be more funny than upsetting. We got used to the way Southerner's put good manners above directness and did just fine while having quite a bit of fun at their expense.