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OK, so I've got a 30 year old disabled daughter who is the single mom of identical twin boys, age 7. (There is no "father" in the picture, so no child support. Last time we heard, he was in jail and we were happy to hear it.)
Dear Daughter has herniated discs, bulging discs, fibromyalgia, migraine headaches, agoraphobia, depression and bi-polar disorder. She is on meds. The boys have ADHD, and are on meds.
She had been fully functional and employed at no less than two full-time jobs - one in the health care industry - before a rear-end motor vehicle accident cut her career short in October 2006. She went through her savings in 30 days and went downhill fast (hence the depression). That case is still dragging on, and hopefully will come to a resolution within two months. She has been unable to drive since the accident, has no car, and has let her license expire.
She rents a tiny cottage within the actual Town of Catskill - - which the Department of Social Services has listed as "inadequate housing" for her and her boys. DSS has been paying $550 of her rent, and hubby and I pay $246. That covers rent, electricity, cable, heat, and water (thank goodness). However, Social Services will be cutting her off in January, due to her having reached her "lifetime maximum." No more rent. Food stamps and medical only. *sigh* We drive up north at least once a month with a care package of items that food stamps don't cover. She depends on helpful friends to take her to the store for groceries.
She has been rejected for Social Security (DBL) but her case is in appeal. She does have an attorney for that claim as well, and it seems that this happens to the majority of cases. They say she may have her appeal hearing in Spring of 2009.
Of course, hubby and I cannot just walk away, but we are nearing the breaking point. We are close to retirement age and do not have unlimited funds to support her and the boys. It seems to us that continuing to pay her entire rent once DSS cuts her off would be self-defeating, and if we owned a small property where she and the boys could live, it would make more sense. The economy is crashing around us, and it's a buyer's market and our credit is excellent. Hubby and I live on Long Island in Suffolk County, but she does not wish to return to this area. Where she is - Greene County - is very isolated. Her ideal location - near friends and one other family member who might help her a bit - would be south of that, more in the area around New Paltz. Ulster County would also be easier for us to get to.
I have an open mind and am willing to listen to all input and suggestions on every topic I have mentioned: relocation, home purchases, school district (special needs kids), safe neighborhoods, health issues, family issues, etc.
There are some great homes up here. Are you thinking of purchasing? If so what price range? As far as the kids go. ADHD is not a major disability. Just about any school district should be able to accommodate. As far as the other issues, I can not comment and would refer that to someone who specializes in that field.
One thing I will say though, make that two: DISK DECOMPRESSION. It did wonders for my two herniated disc's. (L4-L5, L5-S1) The other is that she should look into section 8. I have never heard of a lifetime cap for these programs. Some of my tenants have been with the program for 10+ years.
Moderator cut: realtor soliciting
Last edited by bellafinzi; 11-16-2008 at 10:59 AM..
There are some great homes up here. Are you thinking of purchasing? If so what price range? As far as the kids go. ADHD is not a major disability. Just about any school district should be able to accommodate. As far as the other issues, I can not comment and would refer that to someone who specializes in that field.
One thing I will say though, make that two: DISK DECOMPRESSION. It did wonders for my two herniated disc's. (L4-L5, L5-S1) The other is that she should look into section 8. I have never heard of a lifetime cap for these programs. Some of my tenants have been with the program for 10+ years.
Moderator cut: realtor soliciting
We would absolutely consider a purchase, if we can find something below $75,000. DSS has stated clearly that she has met her lifetime assistance mark (??) so the payment of the rent/mortgage would fall on me and hubby. It makes no sense to pay someone else "rent" when we could own. We already own a property in Illinois, with full-time tenants. We don't make much of a "profit" as the income equals the outgo, but regardless, it is an asset.
Would you be able to tell me more about Section 8? I have heard of it, but need more info. Where is Marlboro?
Thanks also for your input on her disc issues. I do not know what Medicaid covers, but will tell her to ask her physicians. With her depression and agoraphobia, and no transportation, she does not leave the house much. (Forgot to mention in my original post that she also has carpal tunnel syndrome and OCD.)
Last edited by bellafinzi; 11-16-2008 at 10:59 AM..
Would she be able to take care of other children in her home for extra income? How about an income property where she can live on one side and rent the other?
$75k is going to be tight for a two bedroom. It will definitely be a condo or co op, but its close. There are a number out there for under $100k though. I'll send you a Direct Message as I can't post them here. Looks like most are either mobil homes or co-ops.
The Decompression...is not covered by anyone. There are some Chiropractors that offer some great deals on it, but otherwise you are looking at $4k plus for treatment.
In my humble opinion, I think a lot of her issues are resulting from depression. When people are depressed, we are unhealthy and we tend not to take care of ourselves as well as we should which in turn causes us to get sick. Its a vicious cycle. I think once she can discover some self worth, she will begin to feel better about everything else.
Would she be able to take care of other children in her home for extra income? How about an income property where she can live on one side and rent the other?
She probably could do so, and does love kids, as long as there was no "heavy lifting" so that would probably be either infants, or older kids (not toddlers - as they tend to toddle/fall, toddle/fall... LOL ).
Sure, an income property would be a blessing, but it would also cost more for us to invest in -- at first.
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thank you for your comments...
thanks
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