Hey all New Yorkers I miss NY, moved south feel like I made a BIG mistake! (White Plains: apartments, renting)

[NY62]

Originally Posted by Southlander

You forget that Southerners have been treated this way by "Yankees" for generations. Just search "Alabama" on all City-Data forums and you'll see our state, and the South, used as a term interchangeable for "racist, ignorant, hate-filled, stupid." It has been passed down through generations because that is how we have been treated when we venture out of the South. We remember the War Between the States because we lost ancestors in the war, we find minnie balls when we dig in our gardens, we live next to the battlefields. The poverty that enveloped the South after the war still lives in our grandparents' memories, and we have just begun emerging from that with this generation. Until the 1960s, thanks to tariff regulations, it cost more for a company to ship its product to the South than it did to ship it across to the opposite coast. No reason except for prejudicial regulations. So you see, much of this is defensive. Forgive us.

I feel for your grandparents and all but what most people are missing is most of us from NY were not even here for the civil war. Our grandparents and great grandparents came from other places long after the war it just happens ellis island is where they landed and stayed,so to say your families are still hurting has nothing to do with most of us that argument makes no sense at all. Thats like being pissed at the guy next door because the guy before him peed on your lawn.

[smalltownusa]

Originally Posted by NY62

I feel for your grandparents and all but what most people are missing is most of us from NY were not even here for the civil war. Our grandparents and great grandparents came from other places long after the war it just happens ellis island is where they landed and stayed,so to say your families are still hurting has nothing to do with most of us that argument makes no sense at all. Thats like being pissed at the guy next door because the guy before him peed on your lawn.

Well put...

[I'minformed2]

That's very true....most white northeasterners, especially those from the larger cities, trace their orgiins in Ameirca back to the late 1800's/early 1900's....a good 30-40 years AFTER the civil war.

[averagenyjoe]

To that southern person who uses the war so long ago as justification of hating the Northerners because the wounds are so deep and the scars of your emotions are still raw and painful. All I have to add to that is : after New Yorks towers were bombed and it was "STILL FRESH" on New Yorkers minds in the "very same generation" yea, even the "NEXT DAY", you didnt see New yorkers hating, joking, teasing, harassing all the Iraq, Iran and other Middle-east citizens because it was somehow "their people" that did this horrible thing to us. NO, we took each person on their own reputation. of course you had your few renegade jerks that were bullies but certainly not the vast majority of New Yorkers.
Using that same flawed logic, I guess in 5 or more generations from now, we should continue with this carte blanche hatred of all people that stem from the middle east countries. Get over it Southerner. Hate us if you want but dont keep using that stupid war thing.

[averagenyjoe]

Oh, and by the way, Mr. Alabama - Southlander, you say "because we lost ancestors in the war" and "find little balls in the garden" and so forth.....

Oh, and we didnt lose any ancestors in the war????????????????? We dont go looking for little shot balls but if we found one, we'd probably say "oh, COOL" instead of looking somberly at it and weeping. Yep! no battlefields up here either, friend. By the way, I am big into geneology and I have a direct Grandfather that was killed by one of your people and I have alot of the information on that tragedy. I hate it happened but gee whiz, I never knew him. And who am I ?, You're people are no more special than mine and I'm no more special than you. and heck - people have been killed ever since Abel. (you remember him from your Bible lessons).
Come to think of it, I really hate that Kane fellow, he may have killed one of my great greats.....

[Southlander]

Well. Bless your heart. Have a wonderful day!

[taweega]

Originally Posted by missNY

Any yankee down in NC feel like me?? Something is missing here that just isn't home. Lived in the lower hudson valley all my life, got tired of the rat race wanted better life for family....You all know what I mean right?? I even wrote the governor for squashing out the hard working middle class, never heard back. I have been here w/my husband and daughter for 8 LONG months, he's doing better than her and I but we are already putting house back on market. Please NC people when you read this don't get mad I DON"T HATE your state but the majority of you HATE us northerners and I'm sick of it! Guess what you won, we are going back home to kids playing outdoors and neighbors chatting in the front yard and we'll pay through our ***! And yeah some of us may be rude maybe because you are so rude to us, (rolling your eyes as you here my "accent", saying "you won't hold it against me" when I say I'm from NY. I guess I'm bitter, when you get that mostly everyday, how would you feel. Anyway, thanks for letting me sound off and if anybody thinks the grass is greener in NC, think again, don't come here until your kids are grown and you are prepared to live in solitude w/your spouse or significant other.. BYE BYE ignorancy, hello integellency!!! Can't wait to get back, hope my house sells soon!!! I LOVE NY!!!!

I hear ya! I was transferred from LI, NY to pretentious Dallas, TX 15 years ago. I am still trying to adjust to the people, climate and southern mentality. I married a wonderful guy here, he's from Northern MN, we're looking to retire to Upstate NY where there's fresh air and people who get it.

[LauraC]

For those of you that moved and didn't like it, maybe you'll stop chasing cheap and weather and consider more than that before you uproot your family to a place for which you are ill-suited.

Most people don't seem to put a lot of brainpower behind a major life decision like a move. From reading these forums, I have observed too many people who are so desparate to get away from some untolerable condition (too expensive, long commutes, bad schools, etc.) that they move to a new place without thoroughly investigating if they are compatible with the new location. Their main basis for moving is finding the anti-intolerable condition and they either ignore or just assume everything else will fall into place.

I understand moves to a specific location because of a manadatory job transfer (take it or lose your job) or because, for example, an ill relative needs attending to but everybody else who doesn't thoroughly investigate your compatibility with the new location doesn't get my sympathy.

Here's some basic research tips/things you should do before you consider a move to a town:

1. Subscribe to the local newspaper or read it on line for at least 6 months, or a year if you have the luxury of postponing a decision. Specifically read the local/community news, the community calendar of events and the school news, if you have kids. What do people do in the town for fun? What do the kids in the town do for fun? Does it sound like your idea of fun? What's important to the people in the town? Are they the same things that are important to you? Does the town celebrate traditional holidays or are their fairs/festivals generic? Is either important to you? What kind of stories predominate in the newspaper about the schools? Are they stories about kid/teacher academic accomplishments, just sport stories or are they stories about trouble (fiscal/criminal/academic)? It will tell you what the people value (sports/arts/academics). If it says nothing it may be telling you a lot, just by omission. What kind of crime is in the town? Take a look at the letters to the editor. See any patterns over a period of months that may spell out this town is not for you/for you?

2. If you are retired, ask yourself, "What are the things I plan to do in retirement and can I do them easily and frequently in the new town?"

3. Go to an online yellow pages and see what stores/restaurants/services are in the town or the adjacent towns.

4. Do a City Compare (plug the words into Google, you'll find the website) and compare where you live now to the potential new city. You may not know, for example, the population density, voting preferences, annual snowfall/rainfall or religious preferences of the place you live in now, but you know what your current town feels like. If the new town shows vast differences in numbers compared to where you live now, ask yourself if you will be happy with it or you would just tolerate or try to change it. If you can't be happy with the differences, you better think twice about moving to a new place where you'll be tolerating or wanting to change it.

5. Visit for multiple days. If the town is a tourist town, go in season, and not-in-season. What's the traffic like in tourist and non-tourist season? What's open and not open? What's the weather like in January? In July? How are your allergies (natural and man-made pollutants)? When you visit, don't go to the tourist places, go in the local supermarket, post office, library. Engage the locals in discussion. Visit the school when it's in session. Attend service at your house of worship, if you are religious. Does it feel like a good fit for you? If you are there when a town event/activity is taking place, go to it. Look at the people. Talk to the people. When you are in your hotel room, watch the local news.

6. Consider very very carefully if a move from an urban environment to a non-urban environment is a wise choice. If you are doing it to get away from too many people, too much traffic, too expensive housing, too much taxes, don't go 180 degrees in the opposite direction until you figure out what you are going to do with yourself when you aren't working. That vacation in the mountains might be idyllic for 2 weeks in the summer but what are you going to do the other 50 weeks of the year? Are you going to be happly driving 25 miles to go shopping or to the theater? How about handling icy curvy mountain roads everytime you need to go to the supermarket, library, restaurant or take your kid to school? If you come from a big city, consider maybe moving to a smaller city instead of going suburban or rural.

Just some things to consider when you research a new location.

[I2MISSNY]

I, too, moved from NY about nine years ago to Texas. I get those "Yankee" jokes every now and then, but just give it back to the "Southerners"! I'm happy to say that I still have my NY accent. People comment on it all the time. Hope never to lose it! I, too, am planning to move back to NY. You don't reallize how you took a lot of things for granted there til you move away. I miss the energy!

Good luck w/selling your house. I will be putting mine on the market soon. NY here I come!!!

[NY62]

My son moved to florida and was givin grief for being from new york from some southerners in his office. He just told them your just jealous because I have all my teeth and didnt marry my cousin, they started laughing and they have not said anything since.