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Old 10-19-2007, 05:48 AM
Location: Michigan
859 posts, read 1,899,455 times
Reputation: 458


Beats me,,,, cant tell ya till it happends. If it happends...

I love my Kids, and I could not tell you how I would handle a thing like this.
they will always be OUR KIDS.

Last edited by BstYet2Be; 09-23-2008 at 12:00 AM..
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Old 10-19-2007, 06:30 AM
6,561 posts, read 12,872,114 times
Reputation: 3165
See, I'm going to guess here that for a gay person in the process of coming out of the closet all the ignorance, prejudice and discrimination in the world would pale in comparison to a disapproving parent.... Again, like I said three months ago I'd have internal issues with it, but would NEVER let my child know I felt that way... Acceptance and love for one's self starts at home. I think with parental support a homosexual child can face whatever storm society might throw at them.

Not gay, so I don't know for sure. But I'd imagine that this is true.

Last edited by BstYet2Be; 09-23-2008 at 12:00 AM..
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Old 10-19-2007, 06:41 AM
558 posts, read 2,056,550 times
Reputation: 343
When dealing with a teen who is gay, there's some important information that everyone should have, regarding the terribly high suicide rate among gay teens . Here's a place to start:

The Trevor Project (http://www.thetrevorproject.org/home1.aspx - broken link)
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Old 10-19-2007, 08:41 AM
Location: Too far from the beach, NJ
5,073 posts, read 4,238,589 times
Reputation: 2544
Originally Posted by Rance View Post
So many believe that God "made them" gay? And yet does it not mention in the bible about God "not wanting" people to be homosexual? Hmmm...

I honestly believe I would flip right out if my kids told me they thought they were gay. But thats just me. I don't know any gay males or females and have never really been exposed to it...other than I did see some guys holding hands in Stockholm recently.
My best male friend is gay, and has been all his life. Yes, he was "made" that way! Whether you believe in God or some other supreme being, or nature vs. nurture, this is who he is and always has been. It's not a lifestyle choice, it's his life. It is not sinful! When I hear someone say being gay isn't natural, my only response is, well, it wouldn't be natural for a gay person to be with someone of the opposite sex, just as it wouldn't be natural for a straight person to be with someone of the same sex.

I do want to stress this: for any parents who have gay children, and are struggling with the pain and suffering they may go through for being different;
they'll be OK! I have many gay friends, male and female, and I have to say, coming out and the initial identity struggle they may have gone through only made them so much STRONGER as people. Just from my own personal experience (oh, and Stonewall) I would say gay people are so strong and resilient, don't worry. Your gay kids will be just fine.

Oh yeah, *please* be supportive, parents!!!

Last edited by hollygolightly; 10-19-2007 at 08:50 AM..
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Old 10-19-2007, 09:18 AM
Location: Hughes County, Oklahoma
3,160 posts, read 9,652,886 times
Reputation: 1115
If my 20 something child told me out of the blue she was gay I would be very shocked. I would accept that she were gay though. I know too many lesbians who are completely estranged from their parents because of their lifestyle. That is so sad!

When my daughter was a young teen one of her male friends was in a state of flux about whether or not he was gay, so we were able to talk about the subject then.
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Old 10-19-2007, 02:34 PM
384 posts, read 1,595,626 times
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Honestly, it wouldn't change the love I have for him but I would be deeply disappointed. I'm sorry and I hope no one gets offended but I just can't see two men or two women together.

When I was a teenager my cousin and I being the naughty and curious little ones we were, went and rented a porno flick. Well there were these macho looking guys on the cover of the tape so we thought nothing of it. Welllllllllll 2 minutes into the tape and we were both like gagging. So horrified at what we saw that we couldn't finish watching the tape......I guess that serves us right for renting porno flicks at such a young age
It wasn't until later we were talking about it and realized why there weren't any female on cover of the tape.
Though I just can't picture the lifestyle and don't agree with it, I have to say in all fairness, the best friends, the most jovial friends and the most down to earth for real friends that I've ever had, were the gay men that I knew..I had more fun with them than I've ever had hanging out with females. To this day the village of Manhattan and gay parade is one of my favorite things to see...There is just something about their personalities (they: referring to gay men) that I absolutely love. Coincidentally, most of my co-workers are gay and I just love chit chatting with them.

I've always found it odd that I didn't care for the lifestyle but found them to be great friends.

Nevertheless, I've always made it known that I won't judge a person and your life is your life, just as long as you don't try to force your lifestyle on me....and that goes for anything I disagree with, not just the gay lifestyle.
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Old 10-19-2007, 02:52 PM
3,124 posts, read 4,231,324 times
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I've always found it odd that I didn't care for the lifestyle but found them to be great friends.
That's because there is no gay lifestyle
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Old 10-19-2007, 05:55 PM
Location: Sheffield, England
2,639 posts, read 6,025,579 times
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It really wouldn't bother me to be honest. I am 100% of the belief that you are either born straight, gay or bi and that is just part of being you that you cannot change. I myself am bisexual and can say with complete sincerity that I don't choose who I'm attracted to, I just am whether I like it or not. If I had a kid who was gay then just so long as they were happy, I would be happy.
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Old 10-19-2007, 06:20 PM
Location: chesapeake virginia
95 posts, read 282,322 times
Reputation: 34
I as a mother of a 12 yr old boy would be completely heart broken should my son tell me he was gay.
But not because he was gay that wouldn’t bother me . That is his choice in life an I would support what ever he chose.
But for the fact that he would be fighting for his right to choose for the rest of his life. I believe that most parents want the best for there children, a better life than they themselves had. Less struggle heartache. More of the best of life love, dreams, hope. He would have to struggle harder an it would break my heart.
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Old 10-19-2007, 10:35 PM
Location: McKinleyville, California
6,413 posts, read 9,111,243 times
Reputation: 4220
First of all being gay is not a choice, it is the way one is. One is either straight, bi or gay. I have been called cracker, redneck, hippy and others but seldom if ever any gay epithet. I have been out since I was eighteen and knew that I was likely gay by twelve. I told my mom first and she was disappointed but not surprised, she wondered if she had done something wrong that contributed to my being gay. I myself have been in a relationship since I was nineteen, we are in the beginning of our 29th year. It eventually became clear over time that of my moms six children, four of the five boys were gay. Two of my older brothers are bi and I have bi tendencies. Finding out that her sons were gay was a learning process for my mom, she had to overcome deep seated biases . She used to tell me that if she could accept inter racial marriage when it became legal in her youth then she could accept this. I think she was always disappointed in not getting more grandchildren, she came from a large family and looked forward to her six having broods of their own. I have accepted that I will not have kids and that has only made me love my nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews only more.
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