Am i wrong? Friendship issue (father, person, sister, house) - Issues with friends, family, co-workers, acquaintances - City-Data Forum

LisaLynne3 · 01-31-2011, 09:55 AM

My best friend of 9 years came over my house. My mom saw she did a bad parking job so she told her to move her car bc it was an accident waiting to happen.well, she didn't move her car. my sister went to pull out of the driveway later that night and backed up and scratched my friends car. So now my friend asks my mom, "what are we going to do about my car?" my mom was pissed because she told her to move it. so my friend tells my sister its only a little scratch and to not worry about it. so a few weeks go by. my friend texts my sister telling her it would be $550. my sister didn't have that kind of money so she said our father would call her parents about it. my father called and said he thought half and half would be fair to pay since she was told to move the car and didnt. he would pay for half of her car and he wouldn't even ask for anything for the damages to our car. her mother said that my friend wasnt liable because she wasnt technically in the car..... ok, if we were strangers and they wanted to pull that legal b.s. then i wouldnt be surprised but we have been best friends for 9 years AND my mom told her to move her car in the first place!! so when her mother said it was all my sisters fault my dad told her to put it through insurance. hey this isn't about money for us. my father has always been very generous towards my friend, he even offered to pay one of her speeding tickets once when she was too afraid to tell her parents. this isnt about money, its about morals and friendship. so yea, i get it my sister is technically responsible for the accident but my friends car was in the way and she was told to move her car. so me being a loyal friend said its okay we'll get through this bc i know better than to lose a friend over something like this. then i got sick that week and went to Florida the next week so i had time to think. i realized my feelings were hurt and i needed to straighten this out if were ever going to be friends. if you've made it this far, am I wrong? I believe that my friend should have taken half the blame for the accident because she was told to move her car. if you went to a friends house and didnt park right, then their mother told you to move and you didnt. when your car gets hit would you have the nerve to say it wasnt atleast half your fault? its just wrong and i thought i had a better friend than that

darrensmooth · 01-31-2011, 10:07 AM

its partially her fault, but thats almost besides the point, she should never go all 'business first' on you like your some stranger, if I were her, I would just suck it up, I was told to move the car, I didnt and the very thing I was warned about happened, I would just chalk it up to a life lesson

sayulita · 01-31-2011, 10:07 AM

Without capitalization, punctuation and paragraphs, your post is too hard to read. So I didn't.

STT Resident · 01-31-2011, 10:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sayulita

Without capitalization, punctuation and paragraphs, your post is too hard to read. So I didn't.

Maybe this will help:

Quote:

Originally Posted by LisaLynne3

My best friend of 9 years came over my house. My mom saw she did a bad parking job so she told her to move her car bc it was an accident waiting to happen. Well, she didn't move her car, my sister went to pull out of the driveway later that night and backed up and scratched my friends car.

So now my friend asks my mom, "what are we going to do about my car?" My mom was pissed because she told her to move it, so my friend tells my sister its only a little scratch and to not worry about it.

So a few weeks go by. My friend texts my sister telling her it would be $550. My sister didn't have that kind of money so she said our father would call her parents about it. My father called and said he thought half and half would be fair to pay since she was told to move the car and didnt. He would pay for half of her car and he wouldn't even ask for anything for the damages to our car. Her mother said that my friend wasnt liable because she wasnt technically in the car..... ok, if we were strangers and they wanted to pull that legal b.s. then i wouldn't be surprised but we have been best friends for 9 years AND my mom told her to move her car in the first place!! So when her mother said it was all my sisters fault my dad told her to put it through insurance.

Hey this isn't about money for us. My father has always been very generous towards my friend, he even offered to pay one of her speeding tickets once when she was too afraid to tell her parents. This isn't about money, it's about morals and friendship.

So yea, I get it my sister is technically responsible for the accident but my friend's car was in the way and she was told to move her car. So me being a loyal friend said its okay we'll get through this bc i know better than to lose a friend over something like this. Then I got sick that week and went to Florida the next week so I had time to think. i realized my feelings were hurt and I needed to straighten this out if we're ever going to be friends.

If you've made it this far, am I wrong? I believe that my friend should have taken half the blame for the accident because she was told to move her car. If you went to a friend's house and didn't park right, then their mother told you to move and you didn't, when your car gets hit would you have the nerve to say it wasnt at least half your fault? Its just wrong and i thought I had a better friend than that

I guess the insurance companies will work it out. Your Mum should probably have made sure your friend moved her vehicle as asked and your sister should have been paying better attention. Six of one and half a dozen of the other and 50-50 would seem fair. The insurance company might even agree!

purehuman · 01-31-2011, 10:29 AM

morally ,maybe your friend holds a "tiny" bit of blame, but legally your sister holds all the blame. If your sister had run over a child that you'd asked to move...would you blame that child??

darrensmooth · 01-31-2011, 10:44 AM

its how the friend handled it that to me is a bit off, I dont question the sister being technically wrong

findinghope · 01-31-2011, 10:49 AM

tough one! if the car were not in your driveway but in a parking lot, and your freind had done a bad job parking, and someone else hit it due to that fact, whoes fault would it be? obviously the person driving and hitting the parked car. what i dont like is that your freind is not acting like a friend at all, but like some stranger. sorry, but if i were in your shoes, this freindship would leave such a bad taste in my mouth. i cant help it! i know it would be our fault, but still!

Book Lover 21 · 01-31-2011, 11:15 AM

Here's what I would do:

Don't judge your friend for what is going on. Obviously, it is her parents and your parents that are making the decisions regarding the situation. I would get together with your friend and tell her you value your friendship, but let's not talk about the car incident. Whatever gets decided, don't let it damage your relationship.

sayulita · 01-31-2011, 11:27 AM

Thank you, STT Resident, for making it readable.

Now that I've read it, I think that since both cars were damaged, and both parties were at fault, each should pay for the damages to their own car. Besides, at one point, the friend said, " its only a little scratch" and to not worry about it. That should have been the end of it.

PA2UK · 01-31-2011, 11:49 AM

Based on what you've said and how you've described it, I'm naturally inclined to agree your friend has some nerve demanding your dad pay for the damages in full when she was told to move the car. Legally of course I don't think you have case so if they threaten to take it to that level, you might as well just pay the damages. But I would not blame you for reconsidering the friendship over it.

That said, I am curious how exactly the car was parked? What is a "bad parking job" exactly in this situation? I'm curious because one summer I was babysitting for my mom's friend. I would park outside their house, on the street but it was a quiet neighborhood and the street was very wide. After a few times, the women I was babysitting for asked me if I wouldn't mind parking somewhere else because her neighbor had complained. Basically, I was parking opposite the neighbor's driveway (on the other side of the street) and the neighbor was afraid she would back into my car. Really? REALLY? As I've said, the street was VERY wide, she had PLENTY of room to back out of her driveway without even coming close to my car, even with her big honking SUV. And again, it was a quiet neighborhood, it's not like she had to quickly back out of her driveway and join traffic, she could take her time and make sure she knew where the edges of her car were. Furthermore, I was babysitting during the day, in broad daylight!

Of course I did park elsewhere from then on because I didn't want to offend anyone. But I really couldn't help thinking "If you're seriously afraid you might hit a parked car, you probably shouldn't be driving at all!"

I'm not saying the situations are the same. For one, it sounds like your situation happened in the dark. It also sounds like your friend may have genuinely parked carelessly whereas I don't think I did. But we're only getting one side of the story so it's hard to know for sure.