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Old 09-04-2011, 09:37 AM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,269 posts, read 88,551,127 times
Reputation: 39866

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Quote:
Originally Posted by D. Scott View Post
Thanks to all,

Spoke to them last night. They admitted they were a tad harsh, and that they are under some stress now. Their kids are not talking (Again) and they are under strain supporting their adult 40 + yr old son. He never left home and does not work currently. (Has not worked much ever, but this is another story.)

Going to go see them regardless. Family is family, and I never planned to mad for more then a day or so anyway. Life is short, And they are much older as it is. Plus, it's Vegas. Plenty to do if i want to just chill somewhere for a couple of hours by myself.

Thanks All for the advice, My friends.

D. Scott
Love it when an OP takes the time to update their thread

Glad to know you are still going and that you are cutting them some slack for the stress they are under. Sounds like they realize they behaved badly by admitting they were "harsh".

Have a great trip!
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Old 09-04-2011, 09:52 AM
 
Location: The Jar
20,068 posts, read 14,436,398 times
Reputation: 36811
Quote:
Originally Posted by D. Scott View Post
Am planning a vacation to see family in the Las Vegas area.(Oct 1st) I got approved 2 weeks ago to take the time off of work. I go frequently to see them (Once a year mostly) and we get along well. This time may not happen.

Without going on and on about the whole history-Here is it in a nutshell. We are from Miami, and I moved to NY 32 yrs ago. They(Aunt and uncle and thier kids, my parents are long deceased) remained, and moved to LV in 2002. By 19 i was on my own. They have never visited me once-I always went out to see them wherever they lived. I have only gone on a solo vacation to see somewhere else once. All other times vacation time was used too see them-it's family so naturally I used time to see them as they are far away.

Anyway, I have not gotten tickets yet..Had a bunch of expenses, and lost 2 full days of work due to Hurricane Irene (Everything was closed). I have kept them informed of this, and went last year on short notice even. Anyway, I get an e-mail this morning saying maybe I should not bother! That I should be more organized, and if this is due to money, maybe work harder. I have been working hard my whole life, And they never asked them for a thing.They are older folks, and I asked them if they have plans that may be getting interfered with due to this. They do not.

This has got me down big time. I normally get along well with them, despite some of the above.it's very confusing.. Any advice, encouragement for the Brooklyn boy. As they are up there in years I do not wish to fight with them and also any visit could be the last time I see one of them as no one lives forever.
Man! What a bunch of bull!!!!

It sounds like you have a bunch of manipulators in your family. The use of those guilt-tripping words is a big indication of that crappy possibility.

If I were you, I'd back away and not respond for awhile. Certainly don't give them positive reinforcement for such horrendous word actions!

Rememeber this: they made the choice to NOT be understanding, kind, etc. about your situation. If you had malicious intent, that would be one thing. If you were trying to punish them then that would pretty much put you on their level of reaction/words. But the way I am reading your trip results, you are just a victim of circumstance. That makes their response unacceptable at best!!!
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Old 09-04-2011, 09:58 AM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,269 posts, read 88,551,127 times
Reputation: 39866
Quote:
Originally Posted by picklejuice View Post
Man! What a bunch of bull!!!!

It sounds like you have a bunch of manipulators in your family. The use of those guilt-tripping words is a big indication of that crappy possibility.

If I were you, I'd back away and not respond for awhile. Certainly don't give them positive reinforcement for such horrendous word actions!

Rememeber this: they made the choice to NOT be understanding, kind, etc. about your situation. If you had malicious intent, that would be one thing. If you were trying to punish them then that would pretty much put you on their level of reaction/words. But the way I am reading your trip results, you are just a victim of circumstance. That makes their response unacceptable at best!!!
Please read his update two posts above yours!

Some of you guys are so quick to cut ties before ever actually trying to COMMUNICATE and understand what might really be going on
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Old 09-05-2011, 09:53 PM
 
Location: In my view finder.....
8,521 posts, read 13,988,384 times
Reputation: 8079



See, it had nothing to do with you. That's why I kept saying call them.



I'm glad it all worked out.




Quote:
Originally Posted by D. Scott View Post
Thanks to all,

Spoke to them last night. They admitted they were a tad harsh, and that they are under some stress now. Their kids are not talking (Again) and they are under strain supporting their adult 40 + yr old son. He never left home and does not work currently. (Has not worked much ever, but this is another story.)

Going to go see them regardless. Family is family, and I never planned to mad for more then a day or so anyway. Life is short, And they are much older as it is. Plus, it's Vegas. Plenty to do if i want to just chill somewhere for a couple of hours by myself.

Thanks All for the advice, My friends.

D. Scott
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Old 10-16-2011, 11:45 AM
 
Location: Brooklyn,NY
10,614 posts, read 13,151,434 times
Reputation: 16173
Default **update**

Decided to give an update of this thread before it closes. I Went to see them in Vegas. Trip was great and I missed them as they are family. We Went to a buffet, Walked around the strip lost a few bucks in the slots etc Many OP's advice was sound, And very much appreciated!

The son is still home and not talking to his sis, But that is something they must work out for themselves.
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