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Old 09-15-2011, 04:11 PM
 
Location: Land of Free Johnson-Weld-2016
6,470 posts, read 16,346,988 times
Reputation: 6518

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Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
I disagree - jealousy is only normal in immature people, not "most" people.

I would strongly encourage you to find a therapist to discuss your feelings with before you let your anger and frustration consume your life. Having a child is NOT going to cure what ails you right now, and it's not fair to expect that of any child in the first place.
Yes sheesh sorry OP but that sounds insane. You really need to acquire some real problems if having a child is the thing you want most in life...and you're consumed with envious feelings simply because someone else is becoming a mother. Get help and find a hobby. Or sheesh...if you really would like to be a parent and are financially and emotionally ready, how about adoption?
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Old 09-15-2011, 04:15 PM
 
Location: Middle of the valley
48,405 posts, read 34,555,145 times
Reputation: 73489
Quote:
Originally Posted by sherrenee View Post

An emotion I was/am feeling has been taken completely out of context and turned in to a personal attack by people that do not know me at all. You have zero clue about anything in my life, but seem to think you do because I posted on here that I was jealous. The fact is most people do get jealous from time to time, they may not like to admit though. The only difference is I posted on a forum about it as a form of venting. I didn't go to the girl nor did I go to anyone else regarding what I was feeling.
We only know what you chose to share.
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Old 09-15-2011, 04:49 PM
 
Location: Arkansas
1,230 posts, read 3,169,526 times
Reputation: 1569
Hmm perhaps everyone should read this. http://ezinearticles.com/?When-Jealousy-Strikes-During-Infertility&id=452982 (broken link)
http://www.babyzone.com/preconceptio...-else-pregnant
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Old 09-15-2011, 05:35 PM
 
Location: Middle of the valley
48,405 posts, read 34,555,145 times
Reputation: 73489
Quote:
Originally Posted by sherrenee View Post
Hmm perhaps everyone should read this. http://ezinearticles.com/?When-Jealousy-Strikes-During-Infertility&id=452982 (broken link)
Jealous of Friends' Pregnancies? Here's How to Cope

There's a large difference between what the lady said in the first article (paraphrase), "And while I was happy for them, I felt a little jealous."
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Old 09-15-2011, 06:45 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,218 posts, read 100,435,573 times
Reputation: 40197
Quote:
Originally Posted by sherrenee View Post
Jealousy is a very normal emotion. I work with therapist all day and even they would tell you that.

An emotion I was/am feeling has been taken completely out of context and turned in to a personal attack by people that do not know me at all. You have zero clue about anything in my life, but seem to think you do because I posted on here that I was jealous. The fact is most people do get jealous from time to time, they may not like to admit though. The only difference is I posted on a forum about it as a form of venting. I didn't go to the girl nor did I go to anyone else regarding what I was feeling.
Nobody is "attacking" you

Sounds to me like you just don't like the truth some people have served up to you.

I think if you would take the time to SERIOUSLY consider what we are telling you that you'd be so much better off in the long run.

Jealousy is an immature reaction to something, it serves NO useful purpose and is an inappropriate response to the people in your life who have nice/good things happen to them.

You are wrong if you really believe "most people" get jealous and just don't want to admit it.

You might want to really address this with a therapist, the fact you think this jealousy is so "normal".
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Old 09-15-2011, 06:45 PM
 
Location: U.S.A.
19,617 posts, read 20,097,626 times
Reputation: 28688
Quote:
Originally Posted by sherrenee View Post
The fact is most people do get jealous from time to time, they may not like to admit though. The only difference is I posted on a forum about it as a form of venting.
I actually agree with you here.


I'm also tired of seeing people getting reamed for being honest about negative emotions they may experience from time to time.

Everyone has a different set of hurdles in life, and to each their own.

If it's a serious issue, which it seems like it could be, then being overly harsh towards the OP is surely not going to help her.


Now watch some smartass try to take me on...
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Old 09-15-2011, 07:18 PM
 
Location: Arkansas
1,230 posts, read 3,169,526 times
Reputation: 1569
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
Nobody is "attacking" you

Sounds to me like you just don't like the truth some people have served up to you.

I think if you would take the time to SERIOUSLY consider what we are telling you that you'd be so much better off in the long run.

Jealousy is an immature reaction to something, it serves NO useful purpose and is an inappropriate response to the people in your life who have nice/good things happen to them.

You are wrong if you really believe "most people" get jealous and just don't want to admit it.

You might want to really address this with a therapist, the fact you think this jealousy is so "normal".

I talk to therapist on a daily bases due to the fact that I work directly with them and yes jealousy is a completely normal emotion.

I suppose all the other infertile women/men that get jealous from time to time over other people experiencing the joy that they don't get to are also "immature". Jealousy does not mean you have ill will towards someone, it means that you envy something that they have that you don't. There is absolutely nothing wrong with expressing negative emotions as long as you don't allow your negative emotions to hurt others/yourself.

Seems some think if you express anything other than fluffy good feelings than you are wrong, have issues etc. When in fact they to probably at some point feel those exact same emotions but they pretend/try to convenience themselves that they don't.

Perhaps people should address their issue with thinking jealousy is not a normal emotion with a therapist.

From the second article "In a nutshell, it's OK to be angry and all right to be sad. Jealousy is part of the package, too. Those feelings don't make you a bad person. They make you a real person, with real feelings. Feelings that happen to hurt like hell right now.....Dr. Madeline Licker Feingold, PhD, a reproductive medicine psychologist and fertility counselor"
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Old 09-15-2011, 07:19 PM
 
Location: Arkansas
1,230 posts, read 3,169,526 times
Reputation: 1569
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mikala43 View Post
There's a large difference between what the lady said in the first article (paraphrase), "And while I was happy for them, I felt a little jealous."

Which is exactly how I feel...there is no difference.
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Old 09-15-2011, 07:29 PM
 
Location: Davenport, Iowa
2,472 posts, read 4,204,996 times
Reputation: 3432
Quote:
Originally Posted by sherrenee View Post
Which is exactly how I feel...there is no difference.
That seems a little different than "I hate her for it."
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Old 09-15-2011, 07:31 PM
 
Location: Arkansas
1,230 posts, read 3,169,526 times
Reputation: 1569
Quote:
Originally Posted by Slanderous View Post
That seems a little different than "I hate her for it."
Good grief I used it as a figure of speech. Which I have said many many times.
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