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influence who you date or marry? Sure they like to tell us we can do better or that they have a bad feeling about said person. And sometime's they are right & then other time's they are not. What about friend's should you or would you interfer with your friend being happy? When I was single years ago my best friend's wife poked her nose in when she thought that the women I was dating was prettier then she was. She claimed that said girl didn't fit with us. My mom tend's to be over protective of me being that I am an only child. She tends to judge said GF by what went wrong with the last one. So of course in her eyes they are all the same.
Anyone else have things like this happen to you?
Even tried to tell family/friends that thier BF/spouse is wrong for them?
If the person in question was someone whose opinion I respected, then I would hear their side as to why they think this person isn't right for me, after all, sometimes other people can see things we may not see, but other than that, my life is my life and I would hope other people would realize that.
On the other side of the fence, I have been the one who knew somebody was bad for somebody else or just plain not right for them, but rarely did I ever voice it, for the reason listed above.
I would take their advice, but with a grain of salt on most occasions.
With my last relationship, all of my family and friends have told me that this person just needs to go, that I can do a lot better. I've seen the signs before they even told me, but I was in need of just having someone that it pretty much blinded me from my own beliefs, dreams and goals that I didn't care as much of what they said.
I talk to my sister and my mom a lot about past and recent relationships. However, they both have different views on recent stuff. My mom says it best to just enjoy myself because I was able to have someone enjoy my company and being around me, and not think so much of the negative. Also that there is still that flame and possible signs that she still does like me but can't act on them because it would mean her job.
My sister, on the other hand, says to move on, literately. Get out of the place this person works and just move...on. Stop trying to court someone that can't afford time to court, and risk their job if something comes up. If need be, move back to my hometown, get a better job, and get on the dating sites.
influence who you date or marry? Sure they like to tell us we can do better or that they have a bad feeling about said person. And sometime's they are right & then other time's they are not. What about friend's should you or would you interfer with your friend being happy? When I was single years ago my best friend's wife poked her nose in when she thought that the women I was dating was prettier then she was. She claimed that said girl didn't fit with us. My mom tend's to be over protective of me being that I am an only child. She tends to judge said GF by what went wrong with the last one. So of course in her eyes they are all the same.
No, I do not let my family influence me on who to date or marry -- b/c my family is almost always completely and irrationally off-base when they try to do this (and they always try to meddle in these sorts of things).
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Anyone else have things like this happen to you?
Other than family? They likely wouldn't know...or care.
Quote:
Even tried to tell family/friends that thier BF/spouse is wrong for them?
influence who you date or marry? Sure they like to tell us we can do better or that they have a bad feeling about said person. And sometime's they are right & then other time's they are not. What about friend's should you or would you interfer with your friend being happy? When I was single years ago my best friend's wife poked her nose in when she thought that the women I was dating was prettier then she was. She claimed that said girl didn't fit with us. My mom tend's to be over protective of me being that I am an only child. She tends to judge said GF by what went wrong with the last one. So of course in her eyes they are all the same.
Anyone else have things like this happen to you?
Even tried to tell family/friends that thier BF/spouse is wrong for them?
When we are in love with or infatuated with someone, we don't always see the whole picture very clearly. When I was in my 20s, I dated a guy for 6 years. He was welcomed into my family and into my circle of friends with open arms. After he and I went our separate ways, I discovered that none of my loved ones liked him much and all thought he was wrong for me. They only tolerated my bf because they cared so much for me.
I'm not sure how I would've reacted if before the breakup my friends and family had told me they didn't like him. I probably would've gotten defensive about it because I was smitten and naive about men and didn't see him for who he really was. But perhaps if several people had told me he wasn't right for me, I would've looked at him from a different perspective and ended things sooner.
Love screws with our heads; that's for sure!
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When we are in love with or infatuated with someone, we don't always see the whole picture very clearly. When I was in my 20s, I dated a guy for 6 years. He was welcomed into my family and into my circle of friends with open arms. After he and I went our separate ways, I discovered that none of my loved ones liked him much and all thought he was wrong for me. They only tolerated my bf because they cared so much for me.
I'm not sure how I would've reacted if before the breakup my friends and family had told me they didn't like him. I probably would've gotten defensive about it because I was smitten and naive about men and didn't see him for who he really was. But perhaps if several people had told me he wasn't right for me, I would've looked at him from a different perspective and ended things sooner.
Love screws with our heads; that's for sure!
Well said my friend
I will add, an emotionally mature person is never threatened by their loved ones giving them their input either.
Even when you can't see where they are coming from and completely disagree, a wise person will take what those who know them best see into consideration.
It's just the smart thing to do, since as you said, love can screw with your head, and judgement
Been there,Done that,Bought the shirt and spilled the Beer. Each of us state how much honesty is key. Yet if someone submits his\her honest opinion it's not there business (odd). Only time we question influence\comment is when Negative (how many times have you received the "she's a good gir"l,"That's the one","Great catch" etc etc..only to realize he\she turn out awful or not good) I prefer honesty from those I've come to cherish. If you're Green you're Growing, if you're Ripe you are Rotting
If someone close to me doesn't think me and the SO are a good match, I would listen intently for sure, especially if my parents told me this.
I agree. My friends and family only want what's best for me and aren't going to b.s. me about it.
I would be a fool to ignore what they had to say. I am not saying they would make the decision for me (and unfortunately, I have ignored them enough times), but this is the most important decision you will ever make...you ask your buddies about your shoes or your car or your job or where to bank. Why wouldn't you ask them about who to marry?
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My mom tend's to be over protective of me being that I am an only child. She tends to judge said GF by what went wrong with the last one. So of course in her eyes they are all the same. 
