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Perhaps for now, you can make an effort in accepting him where he is in this stage of his life. That matters to people. Even an 18 year old ESFJ needs to feel that he's valued by his family.
Perhaps for now, you can make an effort in accepting him where he is in this stage of his life. That matters to people. Even an 18 year old ESFJ needs to feel that he's valued by his family.
He knows he is loved by me. I will work harder at letting go . . .
Seems to be a generational problem. This generation almost seems petrified to engage in deep discussion with human beings rather than IMing, texting, email, facebook, myspace, twitter, or whatever. They've really become handicapped.
If I were you, I wouldn't take it personally. It's just a phase. What you don't want to do is respond in a manner than makes him FEEL that you are a negative force in his life because he will never forget the emotions that generated. He will however forget many of the things you say.
So settle down. Treat him well until he comes out of it through maturity. When he does emerge, he will remember how you made him feel, not what you said.
Last edited by LexusNexus; 11-19-2011 at 12:45 AM..
INTJs are solid, competent personalities who may seem aloof and even arrogant, but who are typically highly skilled in any field which interests them. INTJs are confident in their skills and knowledge, self-assured, and imaginitive; their exceptional problem-solving skills make them ideal architects, auto mechanics, and tools of the evil empire. While it requires the driving will to conquer of an ENTJ to imagine the Death Star and the evil genius of an ENTP to invent its devastating weapons systems, the skill and technical prowess of the INTJ is what makes the whole thing work.The INTJ sees life as a problem to be solved. For that reason, the INTJ is the person a company brings in from the outside to streamline production processes and identify redundant assets for termination. The INTJ's combination of analyticial problem-solving skills and complete and utter disregard for the morality or consequences of his actions also make him ideal for the job of hatchet man, CIA operative, and helpdesk operator.
RECREATION: INTJs are often baffled by the strange and incomprehensible recreational rituals of other people, such as going to parties, watching television, and having sex. Instead, they prefer to spend their leisure time installing twin missile launchers in their cars to deter tailgaters and playing chess with megalomaniac CEOs of the Tyrell corporation.
COMPATIBILITY: Silly person, INTJs don't have relationships! They may, however build their own friends.
Famous INTJs include J. F. Sebastian and Sgt. Apone
Hmm...sorry I don't mean to go OT, but I've personally been assessed as an INTJ (and, at other times on other personality tests, variously as INFJ, INFP, and a few other combinations), but I am *nothing* like the above description! More like the opposite (but also most definitely not an extrovert either)...
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
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It sounds like 1) he's trying to grow up and stand on his own two feet, to be seen as a man. 2) like he thinks you're confrontational somehow. He needs you to respect and let him be who he is, respect his space, stop asking him motherly questions. If he wants or needs something, he's old enough to ask for it. Give him a chance to be a man. He's already got a mother. Just be a friend. If you're holding on too tightly, it's one of the quickest ways to lose someone. Be beside him, not in his face.
My mom always go about these questions...
typical phone call: "hows the weather?"
-same sh1t as always, it's sweden. "Hows school?"
-lots to do, you know how it goes... "have you found any girl yet?"
-No as always. "they'll come eventually, aren't you going to go to that yoga class soon maybe you'll find someone there?"
-BS. the average age there is 65, I'm 22. "are you spending a lot of time in the gym again?"
-Yes I've always been. "you should spend you're time doing something better that helps you focus, like reading a book or take dance courses...so are you doing ok with money?"
-yes mom I have a job. "are you sure you don't want me to send you some money?"
yes, don't save em for yourself. "but i really could send you some"
-send if you'd like to but it's really not needed.
goes on with more questions...
And this is practically the same thing every time. I know she calls because she cares but damn how interesting is the swedish weather? rain and snow 340 f**k*ng days of the year.
And what's up about asking me about women? If she's so sure they'll come why ask 3 times/week?
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