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An update: located my sister and brother on Facebook, but have not contacted them. searching county records i learned that my father and his wife divorced approximately 15 years ago and she has since remarried. my father lives with my sister as far as i can tell. Still not sure if i should contact them or not though.
An update on an old post from the OP: learned that my later and his wife divorced almost a decade ago. He passed away earlier this year. I had a chance to attend the funeral but chose not to. Found brother, sister, and niece on Facebook but haven't sent any messages or friend requests. The only "proof" I have of a relationship with my father is a photo from about 25 years ago. Still trying to decide if I should initiate contact or just let it go.
An update on an old post from the OP: learned that my later and his wife divorced almost a decade ago. He passed away earlier this year. I had a chance to attend the funeral but chose not to. Found brother, sister, and niece on Facebook but haven't sent any messages or friend requests. The only "proof" I have of a relationship with my father is a photo from about 25 years ago. Still trying to decide if I should initiate contact or just let it go.
Are you saying that your father died earlier this year?
I've just finished reading the whole thread and to me it's clear that you are really wanting contact with your blood relatives.
Why not just discuss everything with your mother? In Dec of 2011 you were trying to figure out how to speak with her about things. Any progress on this front?
According to the dates on the thread, you've been thinking about this for a long time.
My mother passed away as well, so I have no way of obtaining any additional information. Around the time my father passed away, my mother was very sick and her memory wasn't all too clear.
My mother passed away as well, so I have no way of obtaining any additional information. Around the time my father passed away, my mother was very sick and her memory wasn't all too clear.
I'm sorry to hear of this, and I hope the way I asked the question wasn't offensive to you.
If I had a half brother or sister and wasn't aware of their existence, I'm pretty sure I'd want to know. But that's only one opinion. Others on this thread have been strongly opposed to the idea. What do you think now?
Go ahead and contact them. The worst that can happen is they will want nothing to do with you.
I few years ago I helped my grandmother get into contact with her half siblings she had never met. They were very accepting of her and they got to meet each other. However they were aware of her existence so it was no surprise.
Just because your father decided to have an affair and conceive you doesn't mean you should keep silent and not contact your half siblings. You're doing nothing wrong contacting them.
I think since his death is fairly recent, you might want to wait a bit. They might not be in the right frame of mind to hear about their father's infidelity, if they remember their childhood family as a happy one. But in a year or so, when they've adjusted more to his passing, I would approach them. They really might want to know about a half sibling. Just be prepared for a negative reaction if that's not the case. I know from your posts that you won't push the relationship if they don't want one.
I would want to know if I were on their end of the situation. I'm having trouble trying to figure out what to say without it sounding really awkward.
There's really no way to avoid it being awkward. Just say you're their half sibling and would like to have a relationship with them.
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