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Old 12-24-2011, 05:00 AM
 
511 posts, read 2,076,375 times
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Many of my friends at work are traveling long distances to visit relatives this Christmas Weekend. Most will sleep in the guest room, the sofa or the floor at the relatives house. Most tell me that because it is Christmas weekend they will never leave the relatives house. I am getting claustrophobic just thinking about it!

So when you visit the out of town relatives for Thanksgiving or Christmas do they show you a good time outside of their home? Do they show you around their hometown town, or do they take you to their big shopping mall, or do they maybe take the group bowling, to a cultural event, to a movie, or go for a long walk? Do you make use of the things their home town has to offer and turn the whole thing into a mini vacation in a new town, or pretty much just stick around the house and visit?
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Old 12-24-2011, 06:53 AM
 
Location: Knoxville, TN
346 posts, read 440,959 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Workaholic? View Post
Many of my friends at work are traveling long distances to visit relatives this Christmas Weekend. Most will sleep in the guest room, the sofa or the floor at the relatives house. Most tell me that because it is Christmas weekend they will never leave the relatives house. I am getting claustrophobic just thinking about it!

So when you visit the out of town relatives for Thanksgiving or Christmas do they show you a good time outside of their home? Do they show you around their hometown town, or do they take you to their big shopping mall, or do they maybe take the group bowling, to a cultural event, to a movie, or go for a long walk? Do you make use of the things their home town has to offer and turn the whole thing into a mini vacation in a new town, or pretty much just stick around the house and visit?
It just depends who we visit, but usually an offer is made for some type of outing, even if it is just to see the big mall or go to the movies.
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Old 12-24-2011, 08:02 AM
 
Location: Quakertown, Pa., USA
388 posts, read 744,371 times
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This year we will go to my Sisters home and pretty much stay there in the home, last year we went to my Sister-in-laws home and she showed us around her home town, Beijing was great, both ways are nice but I prefer them like a vacation.
Oh and Shengdan Kuaile it means, Merry Christmas
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Old 12-24-2011, 09:42 AM
 
Location: Middle of the ocean
31,271 posts, read 19,739,850 times
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I would think if I was at someone's house during a the holidays we would just stay there. There's always so much to do with cooking and everything, a lot of things would be closed, and traffic a nightmare.

I think it would be a huge imposition to expect someone to host the holiday, have guests, AND be expected to take them and show them the town.
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Old 12-24-2011, 09:56 AM
 
Location: Arlington, VA and Washington, DC
23,563 posts, read 33,282,476 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Workaholic? View Post
Many of my friends at work are traveling long distances to visit relatives this Christmas Weekend. Most will sleep in the guest room, the sofa or the floor at the relatives house. Most tell me that because it is Christmas weekend they will never leave the relatives house. I am getting claustrophobic just thinking about it!

So when you visit the out of town relatives for Thanksgiving or Christmas do they show you a good time outside of their home? Do they show you around their hometown town, or do they take you to their big shopping mall, or do they maybe take the group bowling, to a cultural event, to a movie, or go for a long walk? Do you make use of the things their home town has to offer and turn the whole thing into a mini vacation in a new town, or pretty much just stick around the house and visit?
If they have a town worth seeing, they would. Most of my family lives in boring rural towns so they never show me their towns. Now when my dad was alive and living in different places in NC and VA, we had many a time driving around his towns.
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Old 12-24-2011, 10:14 AM
 
2,726 posts, read 4,499,193 times
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Some relatives like to go out, we go with them. Some like to be outside, we join them. Some like to be indoors, we spend time with them and if we want to go to town, they give us the keys to their car.
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Old 12-24-2011, 10:21 AM
 
28,906 posts, read 46,582,918 times
Reputation: 45995
Quote:
Originally Posted by Workaholic? View Post
Many of my friends at work are traveling long distances to visit relatives this Christmas Weekend. Most will sleep in the guest room, the sofa or the floor at the relatives house. Most tell me that because it is Christmas weekend they will never leave the relatives house. I am getting claustrophobic just thinking about it!

So when you visit the out of town relatives for Thanksgiving or Christmas do they show you a good time outside of their home? Do they show you around their hometown town, or do they take you to their big shopping mall, or do they maybe take the group bowling, to a cultural event, to a movie, or go for a long walk? Do you make use of the things their home town has to offer and turn the whole thing into a mini vacation in a new town, or pretty much just stick around the house and visit?
Oh my God. Are you just an inert lump of clay who sits there and waits for people to entertain you? This post tells me that you are a consumer of happiness without actually creating any in return.

You devote a lot of time and energy kvetching about how boring your in-laws are. But has it ever occurred to you that you're not a very good guest? Rather than sitting around waiting for your hosts to do something, anything that amuses you, here's a revolutionary idea: Think of something that would divert them.

How hard would it be for you to pick up the newspaper and say to them, "Hey, here's a really cool exhibit at the art museum"? Or say, "You know, I've heard there's this really cool place in town that I've never visited. Why don't we take a little drive over there and check it out. My treat. After all, you've been such good hosts, I'd like to do something special for you. It will be fun." Something tells me that thought has never formed in your brain.

And if they balk, go anyway. But at least you've done something besides passively stewing and whining about being bored, which is likely embarrassing for your S/O and gives your in-laws fresh new reasons to dislike you.

Last edited by cpg35223; 12-24-2011 at 10:32 AM..
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Old 12-24-2011, 10:33 AM
 
Location: SoCal - Sherman Oaks & Woodland Hills
12,977 posts, read 29,565,513 times
Reputation: 10491
Quote:
Originally Posted by Workaholic? View Post
Many of my friends at work are traveling long distances to visit relatives this Christmas Weekend. Most will sleep in the guest room, the sofa or the floor at the relatives house. Most tell me that because it is Christmas weekend they will never leave the relatives house. I am getting claustrophobic just thinking about it!

So when you visit the out of town relatives for Thanksgiving or Christmas do they show you a good time outside of their home? Do they show you around their hometown town, or do they take you to their big shopping mall, or do they maybe take the group bowling, to a cultural event, to a movie, or go for a long walk? Do you make use of the things their home town has to offer and turn the whole thing into a mini vacation in a new town, or pretty much just stick around the house and visit?
Thankfully, all my family live here in L.A. so there is no need for overnight visits. The wife's family are all from Europe so when they come I always offer to take them places or do things but they almost always just want to chill at home. Think its because they have been traveling all their lives with their careers and already know or have seen everything in L.A. But, at least I offer.
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Old 12-24-2011, 10:34 AM
 
2,726 posts, read 4,499,193 times
Reputation: 1950
Quote:
Originally Posted by cpg35223 View Post
Oh my God. Are you just an inert lump of clay who sits there and waits for people to entertain you? This post tells me that you are a consumer of happiness without actually creating any in return.

You devote a lot of time and energy kvetching about how boring your in-laws are. But has it ever occurred to you that you're not a very good guest? Rather than sitting around waiting for your hosts to do something, anything that amuses you, here's a revolutionary idea: Think of something that would divert them.

How hard would it be for you to pick up the newspaper and say to them, "Hey, here's a really cool exhibit at the art museum?" Or say, "You know, I've heard there's this really cool place in town that I've never visited. Why don't we take a little drive over there and check it out. My treat. After all, you've been such good hosts, I'd like to do something special for you. It will be fun."

And if they balk, go anyway. But at least you've done something besides passively stewing and whining about being bored, which is likely embarrassing for your S/O and gives your in-laws fresh new reasons to dislike you.
I think you may have described me.

I am not defending the way the OP described his in-laws in other threads. He clearly needs an new attitude instead of waiting for others to have a new attitude with him.

I grew up in a large family in which I did what everybody else wanted to do. I knew what everybody else liked to do but they hardly knew anything about me.

I carried this behavior on to my marriage and with my husband's family. They were quite annoyed that I rarely came up with things to do. I was always willing to do what they wanted. They certainly didn't have the class to just "deal with it" for the few days we saw each other each year.

It was used as an excuse to dislike me and treat me poorly. It is very mean and hurtful.
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Old 12-24-2011, 10:44 AM
 
28,906 posts, read 46,582,918 times
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Originally Posted by crisan View Post
I think you may have described me.

I am not defending the way the OP described his in-laws in other threads. He clearly needs an new attitude instead of waiting for others to have a new attitude with him.

I grew up in a large family in which I did what everybody else wanted to do. I knew what everybody else liked to do but they hardly knew anything about me.

I carried this behavior on to my marriage and with my husband's family. They were quite annoyed that I rarely came up with things to do. I was always willing to do what they wanted. They certainly didn't have the class to just "deal with it" for the few days we saw each other each year.

It was used as an excuse to dislike me and treat me poorly. It is very mean and hurtful.
Well, grownups learn to contribute, not just consume. Most learn that lesson. A few, however, will choose to be gigantic pains in the ass for everyone else for the rest of their days.
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