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View Poll Results: Can an alpha male be a nice guy?
No - except in rare circumstances 23 35.38%
Yes - it happens commonly, not rarely 42 64.62%
Voters: 65. You may not vote on this poll

 
 
Old 02-09-2012, 12:01 AM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,691 posts, read 19,680,978 times
Reputation: 11862

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The term 'nice guy' is bandied around a bit too much. Think of the phrase 'nice guys finish last.' Many young males, frustrated at the lack of female attention/success in dating, often blame it on being 'too nice.' Some might be, but some are really just bitter and too cowardly to actually show their true colours.

I'm talking about genuinely nice guys...caring, considerate blah blah blah.

In nature, alpha males kind of HAVE to be tough and ruthless, when you think about it. They have to fight males, be belligerent and confrontational (just playing their role). There's no room for compassion and sensitivity. I know we are not deer BUT it has been my observation that in societies where males compete fiercely for females and maintain a harem or a mate, it's more of a 'wham bam thankyou mam' situation...certainly no tender loving car that romantic novels and movies aimed at women bray about.

It is in the societies with more monogamous structures - birds and some mammals, or at least structures where competition is less aggressive, where men - i mean males, lol, are the better providers, who seem to have an actual bond with their mate.

I'd say humans are a mix of the two extremes - the competitiveness instinct of the deer mixed in with the monogamous romanticism of the swan. So in that case, do you think it's true alpha males, jocks, whatever you want to call them, are much less commonly the 'nice guy'? I'm sure there are exceptions, but in GENERAL, do you think this is the case?
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Old 02-09-2012, 12:08 AM
 
Location: Viña del Mar, Chile
14,517 posts, read 13,035,600 times
Reputation: 13337
Your idea of nice guy sounds like a p*ssy.

Your ideas seem off. Way off



Alpha male can be respectful and nice without being a pushover to women and listening to what guy they banged the night before

Honestly, I hate the term alpha male, i just think of some guy on the jersey shore.
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Old 02-09-2012, 12:15 AM
 
Location: Utah
1,429 posts, read 1,040,744 times
Reputation: 687
Quote:
Originally Posted by burgler09 View Post
Your idea of nice guy sounds like a p*ssy.

Your ideas seem off. Way off



Alpha male can be respectful and nice without being a pushover to women and listening to what guy they banged the night before

Honestly, I hate the term alpha male, i just think of some guy on the jersey shore.
I couldn't have said it better myself!

Really if you have to go getting into fights to prove your an alpha male, hint, your NOT an alpha male let alone a real man. Real men exude control and dominance. They don't have to walk around proving how macho they are. As a matter of fact men who behave that way come off as anti alpha male.
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Old 02-09-2012, 12:21 AM
 
Location: USA
1,320 posts, read 645,827 times
Reputation: 1354
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
The term 'nice guy' is bandied around a bit too much. Think of the phrase 'nice guys finish last.' Many young males, frustrated at the lack of female attention/success in dating, often blame it on being 'too nice.' Some might be, but some are really just bitter and too cowardly to actually show their true colours.

I'm talking about genuinely nice guys...caring, considerate blah blah blah.

In nature, alpha males kind of HAVE to be tough and ruthless, when you think about it. They have to fight males, be belligerent and confrontational (just playing their role). There's no room for compassion and sensitivity. I know we are not deer BUT it has been my observation that in societies where males compete fiercely for females and maintain a harem or a mate, it's more of a 'wham bam thankyou mam' situation...certainly no tender loving car that romantic novels and movies aimed at women bray about.

It is in the societies with more monogamous structures - birds and some mammals, or at least structures where competition is less aggressive, where men - i mean males, lol, are the better providers, who seem to have an actual bond with their mate.

I'd say humans are a mix of the two extremes - the competitiveness instinct of the deer mixed in with the monogamous romanticism of the swan. So in that case, do you think it's true alpha males, jocks, whatever you want to call them, are much less commonly the 'nice guy'? I'm sure there are exceptions, but in GENERAL, do you think this is the case?
The terms require a definition. But if alpha males = insensitive and ruthless,

then by definition, they are the opposite of "nice guys"

If "nice guys" = sensitive and can relate to women

however, if alpha males are simply tough guys, I am sure some tough guys are decent and noble in their character, and could be considered nice people (if nice doesn't mean soft of course, but just having integrity and caring about the welfare of others)
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Old 02-09-2012, 12:31 AM
 
4,445 posts, read 4,251,693 times
Reputation: 2615
I thought alpha males were just more assertive, go getters. that doesn't always translate to a-hole.
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Old 02-09-2012, 12:37 AM
 
47,585 posts, read 35,904,646 times
Reputation: 21592
True alphas aren't bullies, they're just natural leaders. Alpha characteristics include self-confidence, leadership and isn't about clubbing people over the head.
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Old 02-09-2012, 12:46 AM
 
Location: SWUS
5,392 posts, read 4,561,532 times
Reputation: 5649
I'm not going to vote on this one, because my answer is "somewhere in between".
Young men these days seem to think that "being an alpha" naturally includes being an *******. True, the alpha males that many of our fathers were only had natural leadership tendencies and confidence... but somewhere along the line, someone combined "I'm tired of being a nice guy all the time, when *******s get all the girls and glory" and being "THAT GUY" and the modern-day version of an alpha male was created.

Many of these guys DO just use it as an excuse to be a dick all the time, and while they do get what they want, it seems to not work out so well in the long run. This behavior is most commonly viewed in fraternities and in the lower enlisted ranks of the military, in my experience.
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Old 02-09-2012, 12:51 AM
 
4,445 posts, read 4,251,693 times
Reputation: 2615
Quote:
Originally Posted by JordanJP View Post
Many of these guys DO just use it as an excuse to be a dick all the time, and while they do get what they want, it seems to not work out so well in the long run. This behavior is most commonly viewed in fraternities and in the lower enlisted ranks of the military, in my experience.
you just described men in my stupid town and exactly why I'm STILL single! lol
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Old 02-09-2012, 12:53 AM
 
461 posts, read 378,476 times
Reputation: 996
I couldn't pick out an alpha male if you had a gun to my head because the criteria is completely subjective. To you guys, it's the guy who gets the bimbos you so desire.

What really is your point about alpha? You just want to get chicks? That has nothing to do with being nice because it's just a numbers game. I could care less about hooking up with an alpha. I do want a nice guy who is intelligent, attractive & has similar values. There is no supposed alpha male that can win me over if he doesn't exhibit traits that I want. No way, no how. The nice guy I am attracted to will win every time and that is the real alpha male for a decent woman.

Idiotic men attract idiotic women, why be jealous of them?
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Old 02-09-2012, 12:53 AM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,691 posts, read 19,680,978 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by DayLight1555 View Post
The terms require a definition. But if alpha males = insensitive and ruthless,

then by definition, they are the opposite of "nice guys"

If "nice guys" = sensitive and can relate to women

however, if alpha males are simply tough guys, I am sure some tough guys are decent and noble in their character, and could be considered nice people (if nice doesn't mean soft of course, but just having integrity and caring about the welfare of others)
Let's say...someone who has to fight to get to the 'top', and use aggression to stay there. Those who feel a need to be dominant and show off how manly they are.
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