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Old 06-25-2008, 02:56 PM
 
Location: Albany, GA (Hell's Waiting Room)
602 posts, read 1,767,315 times
Reputation: 287

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Quote:
Originally Posted by mrstewart View Post
Unfortunately, last summer I cut off ties with a woman I had been friends with since second grade and we are now 38. She had been pregnant and had a miscarriage. Everyone responds differently to life's obstacles, but I was highly offeneded by her response.

She sent a mass email stating she was happy she was not going to be wearing maternity clothes any longer, getting fat, going to doctors appointments, suffering with morning sickness, etc. and I took great offense to this. I have had several miscarriages my self and could not believe what I was reading.

I wrote her back, told her that I was sorry for her loss but I would like her to take me off her mass email list pertaining to the miscarriage because I found her attempts at humor to be in poor taste and hurtful. I thought this was a nice response...not too harsh but to the point. I also offered to talk with her in private emails, in person or by phone, but I felt this topic to be of a personal nature.

She fired an email back telling me I needed to get over it, I should understand since I had been through it, and I needed to "lighten up" and learn to laugh.
I did not respond.

She has since gotten pregnant emailed me but I do not know what to say.

Actually, I do not miss the high maintenance of our relationship.
You're kidding with this, right? She said that? @#$% needs to be smacked upside the head. Insensitive, hateful cow.
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Old 06-25-2008, 03:02 PM
 
Location: syracuse ny
2,412 posts, read 4,508,130 times
Reputation: 2034
Quote:
Originally Posted by I LOVE PA! View Post
just curious...has anyone broken a long friendship? What brought you to that decision? Did you regret it later on?
I have done this with a friend, and sometimes wonder if it was irrational or should I have just got over our diffference. In the end, she idd something that really hurt my feelings, said she was sorry that my feeling were hurt but still didn't agree that I should have been hurt by what she had done. I just felt she was not the person I thought she was, she took advantage of me in a big way. We were friends for 10 yrs and I just broke off all contact with her.
Anyone else been through this?
BETRAYED...
But I gained two friends who are like sisters to me from it.
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Old 06-25-2008, 03:06 PM
 
Location: Boca Raton, FL
5,139 posts, read 8,665,544 times
Reputation: 6119
Smile My sister had a good friend...

Quote:
Originally Posted by I LOVE PA! View Post
just curious...has anyone broken a long friendship? What brought you to that decision? Did you regret it later on?
I have done this with a friend, and sometimes wonder if it was irrational or should I have just got over our diffference. In the end, she idd something that really hurt my feelings, said she was sorry that my feeling were hurt but still didn't agree that I should have been hurt by what she had done. I just felt she was not the person I thought she was, she took advantage of me in a big way. We were friends for 10 yrs and I just broke off all contact with her.
Anyone else been through this?
My sister had a very good friend as an adult. Their friendship lasted for years. One day, out of the blue, my sister gets a letter stating - something like - we are no longer friends, it's a different season - or something like that - my sister tried to talk to her. It is/was so weird, very hurtful to my sister, she was part of the family, no big fight or disagreement at all; my sister's children were equally hurt - always called her Aunt .... - we always viewed her as a nice person, very blubbly.
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Old 06-25-2008, 03:11 PM
 
13,779 posts, read 23,692,532 times
Reputation: 7404
Quote:
Originally Posted by FlourChild View Post
You're kidding with this, right? She said that? @#$% needs to be smacked upside the head. Insensitive, hateful cow.
If I were more tech saavy I would post the actual email. I gave the fluff version...

Yep, it's true. Sad, huh?
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Old 06-26-2008, 05:53 AM
 
Location: Naptowne, Alaska
15,596 posts, read 35,230,497 times
Reputation: 14693
Growing up I had a best friend (a guy) right up through highschool. I also had a girlfriend of 5 years that lived next door. My senior year (her junior)...with the up coming prom and naturally I asked her if she would go with me. I was floored when she told me my buddy had already asked her to go with him...and she accepted. Pretty much in shock...I did not go to the prom. The next morning after the prom...she comes over and starts crying and telling me how my best friend of the last 8 years had date raped her. I just told her I was sorry but I no longer wanted anything to do with her or my buddy ever again, and wrote them both off. Never did speak to either of them again (well...other than to call my so called buddy a low life peice of you know what for raping my girlfriend, and I did it in front of 20 other classmates). Life can be a real SOB sometimes...but she was getting no sympathy from me. He was the highschool jock. Guess she thought she was boosting her ego by going with him and not me.
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Old 06-26-2008, 02:53 PM
 
Location: Chicago
38,690 posts, read 89,042,635 times
Reputation: 29446
Wow. Telling a girl who had just been raped to get lost was stone cold. I don't care how hurt your feelings were -- that was an incredibly jerky thing to do.
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Old 06-26-2008, 04:20 PM
 
Location: Jersey in da Citi!!
874 posts, read 3,404,386 times
Reputation: 473
Quote:
Originally Posted by Drover View Post
I had a friend who was once one of the most generous, loyal human beings you could ever meet -- one of those folks that you're awfully glad is in your corner. Then one day while driving a metal stake into the ground to anchor a mobile home, he hit a power line. There was so much damage to his heart muscle the doctors gave him three years to live. That's sucky news when you're 24 years old. At first nothing was different except that he had lost the use of one arm (the one he was holding the stake with, obviously). But after a while he developed a very warped sense of entitlement. ("I'm not going to be around long, I can do whatever I want, you should do whatever I want you to do for me," et cetera.) It even started to affect his moral compass such that he had no qualms about stealing from people, playing around with womens' emotions, et cetera. You want to hang in there with a good friend through hard times, especially when you know he doesn't have much time left, but putting up with his newfound antisocial streak got to be too much. He managed to alienate pretty much everyone except his own parents. Sometimes I blame myself for being too hard on him and not being "understanding" of what he was going through and why his personality had changed the way it did. Sometimes I blame him for not conducting himself better even under the circumstances; there are plenty of people who find out they are terminal and do not become bitter, amoral, self-absorbed narcissistic jerks.

After not talking to him for a few years, I drove by his house one day when I was back in town visiting someone else. I almost went and knocked on his door, but I didn't know what I would have said. I found out later that he died of heart failure at age 28, 2 months after I drove past his house. I really wish I would have stopped and knocked that day.
Wow..that is so deep..i'm sorry for your loss.
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Old 06-26-2008, 06:00 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,837 posts, read 78,919,079 times
Reputation: 22814
Quote:
Originally Posted by Drover View Post
Wow. Telling a girl who had just been raped to get lost was stone cold. I don't care how hurt your feelings were -- that was an incredibly jerky thing to do.
I don't think so. Both his "friends" got exactly what they deserved.
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Old 06-26-2008, 06:36 PM
 
Location: Chicago
38,690 posts, read 89,042,635 times
Reputation: 29446
Nobody deserves to be raped just because some thin-skinned kid's feelings were hurt. That's just sick.
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Old 06-26-2008, 06:41 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,837 posts, read 78,919,079 times
Reputation: 22814
Quote:
Originally Posted by Drover View Post
Nobody deserves to be raped just because some thin-skinned kid's feelings were hurt. That's just sick.
The two events you bundled together in the same sentence are totally unrelated. Not much different than having 9/11 and Iraq in the same sentence. Granted, this attempt at explaining them has been quite successful, so yours may very well be, too - to the same audience who believed in the just mentioned example.
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