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Old 04-12-2012, 05:22 PM
 
244 posts, read 614,580 times
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My best friend and I have been close for two years now, and our friendship is still going strong, I can honestly say there hasn't been a day when the two of us have not spoken to one another. It's hard to really describe what exactly drives our friendship, the two of us are sort of complete opposites. She's headstrong, sometimes independent, very sexual and intelligent. I'm quiet, reserved, and sometimes really naive.

The two of us joke around a lot, talk about interesting subjects or sometimes even dumb pointless ones and even argue and threaten each other. It's really difficult to kinda describe our friendship, sometimes it's sexual, a normal heart to heart friendship, and even a rivalry. But lately she's been giving off weird signs that make me believe she "likes me" but doesn't want to go any farther in fear of losing our friendship.

In our friendship, my friend has dated around three different guys (she's currently dating her third boyfriend, nothing is set in stone as of yet). But in each of them she comes to me about her problems, not with her relationships, but most stuff concerning her life. She enjoys talking about her boyfriends to me, yet gets easily jealous (when I mean easily, the slight mention of another girl's name or seeing a girl's text on my phone sets her off). Even when I show interest in a girl, she does her best to change the subject to her or bring me down (ex. She's not interested in you, you're too short for her, etc lol).

Honestly I love her to death but her actions confuse me. I feel like one part of her loves me, another values our friendship, and the other sort of gets annoyed with me. Sorry if this passage seemed so long but I felt like talking to someone about this because she's "interesting".
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Old 04-12-2012, 05:28 PM
 
199 posts, read 330,004 times
Reputation: 193
She probably wants to be more than just friends with you, especially if jealousy enters the mix when discuss other women.

Possibly she might not feel good enough for you, or doesn't find you physically attractive? No offense. It also might be a brother/sister thing going on as well.
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Old 04-12-2012, 05:40 PM
 
1,133 posts, read 1,911,462 times
Reputation: 1239
Quote:
Originally Posted by redhead360 View Post
My best friend and I have been close for two years now, and our friendship is still going strong, I can honestly say there hasn't been a day when the two of us have not spoken to one another. It's hard to really describe what exactly drives our friendship, the two of us are sort of complete opposites. She's headstrong, sometimes independent, very sexual and intelligent. I'm quiet, reserved, and sometimes really naive.

The two of us joke around a lot, talk about interesting subjects or sometimes even dumb pointless ones and even argue and threaten each other. It's really difficult to kinda describe our friendship, sometimes it's sexual, a normal heart to heart friendship, and even a rivalry. But lately she's been giving off weird signs that make me believe she "likes me" but doesn't want to go any farther in fear of losing our friendship.

In our friendship, my friend has dated around three different guys (she's currently dating her third boyfriend, nothing is set in stone as of yet). But in each of them she comes to me about her problems, not with her relationships, but most stuff concerning her life. She enjoys talking about her boyfriends to me, yet gets easily jealous (when I mean easily, the slight mention of another girl's name or seeing a girl's text on my phone sets her off). Even when I show interest in a girl, she does her best to change the subject to her or bring me down (ex. She's not interested in you, you're too short for her, etc lol).

Honestly I love her to death but her actions confuse me. I feel like one part of her loves me, another values our friendship, and the other sort of gets annoyed with me. Sorry if this passage seemed so long but I felt like talking to someone about this because she's "interesting".
It sounds like she pushes you around and protects you as if you're her little cousin. You say there's sexual tension, but nothing in your passage depicts anything remotely sexual. Jealousy is not sexual. No point in jeopordizing a good friendship over this.
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Old 04-12-2012, 05:58 PM
 
244 posts, read 614,580 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by irwin2012 View Post
She probably wants to be more than just friends with you, especially if jealousy enters the mix when discuss other women.

Possibly she might not feel good enough for you, or doesn't find you physically attractive? No offense. It also might be a brother/sister thing going on as well.
It's probably more so she doesn't find me physical attractive, or I don't know, she talks down about my height but tends to become very flirtatious around me sometimes by saying sexual things at random moments. We just joke around about it, she's difficult to read.
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Old 04-12-2012, 06:38 PM
Cow
 
Location: Eastern Oregon
154 posts, read 173,249 times
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I think she sees you as an ace in the hole if none of these other boyfriends work out. If she was truly only wanting friendship she wouldn't avoid YOUR relationship questions and nit pick all the women you've been dating. She wants you single and always available.

Basically, you're the backup plan.
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Old 04-12-2012, 06:49 PM
 
7,368 posts, read 11,539,381 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by redhead360 View Post
It's probably more so she doesn't find me physical attractive, or I don't know, she talks down about my height but tends to become very flirtatious around me sometimes by saying sexual things at random moments. We just joke around about it, she's difficult to read.
Not good.

No woman I have ever dated has talked down about my height or said something like 'because you're so short' or called me 'little' (and I am really short). I can't even recall a good female friend or a female I really respect doing it either.

Gals know short dudes are sensitive about that thing.

Unless you guys are the rambunctious types who joke about everything. But I don't roll with a crowd like that.

If a woman ever called me 'short' in a condescending way even if it was joking around or called me 'little' I'd assume she's not attracted.
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Old 04-12-2012, 08:12 PM
 
734 posts, read 1,465,005 times
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I don't know enough to make a sound judgment, but this sounds to me like the plot of a fun young adult novel. :P I meant that as a compliment. So enjoy yourselves. You are young and you have a best friend who might or might not like you. Experiment. There is nothing to lose.
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Old 04-12-2012, 09:06 PM
 
199 posts, read 330,004 times
Reputation: 193
I've always found it VERY difficult to be "just friends" with a woman you might have dated or developed feelings.

Maybe she sees you as not someone who rings her bell, but a shoulder to cry on, or possible future relationship when she wants to get serious?
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Old 04-12-2012, 09:07 PM
 
Location: East coast-New England
1,638 posts, read 1,785,533 times
Reputation: 3538
OP, dont read much into it. In my opinion, she's not attracted enough to you for her to want to date YOU..but she's just a bit possessive of you because maybe she just feels you should be there for her needs and wants. Like if she needs a hangout buddy, someone to talk to, etc.

I remember I was actually DATING a guy for a short time that I just wasnt feeling enough sparks for. I tried, because he was a good guy, but I just wasnt feeling it. He was like a puppy with me though, very into me.

One day I found out his ex had run into him while he was at the mall, and he had walked around a bit talking to her as they shopped. Nothing major, and he called me right up after he came home and told me about it. I felt kinda jealous when I heard that. Now, I knew in my heart that I didnt really feel fireworks for this guy, and probably was gonna break up with him (which I eventually did) but i still felt jealous. Its like, even though I wasnt all hot for him, I didnt want anyone else near him either. LOL

Try to figure out the human brain sometimes..eh. Makes no sense sometimes. But, thats the way it goes sometimes. People just feel things that dont make sense, really. So like I said, dont read too much into her jealousy. If she was really into you, and was interested in you, you wouldnt have to come on here to try to figure her out. You would have already been dating her.
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Old 04-12-2012, 09:38 PM
 
Location: New Zealand and Australia
7,456 posts, read 11,534,725 times
Reputation: 7783
Give me her number I'll hit it since you won't
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