friend demanding I pay her back now..when I can't.. (person, member)
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I forgot this forum is full of middle class professionals. I'm a poor college kid..45 bucks is the diffrence between a meal and a full gas tank, or not, for me.
Charlotteborn-you're right..last time I do this. I guess I expected a different reaction from someone I've been friends with for so long.
ya, proving my point about you not being able to afford it.
ya, proving my point about you not being able to afford it.
ya and mistakenly I let her get the tix. my bad. Just didn't think she'd be so strict about timing and how much I pay and when..its not like her. I've always paid back within 2 months. I think that's fair in my situation..maybe not though..who knows.
My opinion, you make an agreement, you stick to it. Borrow from another friend if that's what it takes.
Many of my relatives are very, very wealthy. I'm poor as dirt. The times they were willing to loan me money, I paid them back before or on time. No excuses. If it meant paying my rent late, not eating for a day or two, whatever it took I paid them back on time and IF it was due to my negligence I suffered the consequences, not anyone else.
Your friends finances, imo, are not your business. Apples/oranges.
I know I sound harsh but you will learn, one way or the other, life is harsh and keeping your word is most important.
My opinion, you make an agreement, you stick to it. Borrow from another friend if that's what it takes.
Many of my relatives are very, very wealthy. I'm poor as dirt. The times they were willing to loan me money, I paid them back before or on time. No excuses. If it meant paying my rent late, not eating for a day or two, whatever it took I paid them back on time and IF it was due to my negligence I suffered the consequences, not anyone else.
Your friends finances, imo, are not your business. Apples/oranges.
I know I sound harsh but you will learn, one way or the other, life is harsh and keeping your word is most important.
Just my two cents.
I'm with you on being responsible but things happen. Also, on a completely different note, if my family was wealthy, they would never ever ask me to pay them back if I ever got myself in a bind ..not to mention, if they really wanted me to pay them back..they would never allow me to do it at the expense of my rent being paid ...wow. I see this a lot in American families...my parents don't get it. I kinda don't either as I was brought up to be as hospitable as you can afford to be, whether that's monetarily or otherwise. but anyways...I see your point..but things happen. this is not a normal occurrence with me..I live within my means. I just felt somewhat obligated to go with my friend to this concert cause I didn't want to offend her and she begged me (I know..my bad, lesson learned).
I'm with you on being responsible but things happen. Also, on a completely different note, if my family was wealthy, they would never ever ask me to pay them back if I ever got myself in a bind ..not to mention, if they really wanted me to pay them back..they would never allow me to do it at the expense of my rent being paid ...wow. I see this a lot in American families...my parents don't get it. I kinda don't either as I was brought up to be as hospitable as you can afford to be, whether that's monetarily or otherwise. but anyways...I see your point..but things happen. this is not a normal occurrence with me..I live within my means. I just felt somewhat obligated to go with my friend to this concert cause I didn't want to offend her and she begged me (I know..my bad, lesson learned).
My family is not responsible for my disability and therefore indigence. It's their money and if you see it as selfish then that's how it is in your mind. In my mind, I borrow, I pay back and rarely do I borrow.
Yes, things happen. I had a wonderful career and job and then I got sick..real sick with a progressive illness. You may think my is family selfish.. and sometimes, so do I..BUT it's their money NOT mine and I have no right to define their behavior...only mine.
ETA: Just because some of my family live in 20,000 square feet houses, eat out all the time at extremely expensive restaurants, have the best of the best doesn't necessarily mean they are rich. Maybe, just maybe, they are in debt up to their eyeballs. Again, I don't care, it's not my business.
of course I was going to pay her. I just can't today. I told her I can pay her today due to today being pay day..which it wasn't. we never set a date of when I would pay her when she bought the ticket..she just a week ago asked for the rest of the money. She has to wait a few days until I get my check from my other job..I guess that makes me entitled. Regardless, I told her it would be a bit before I could pay her and she just said I could pay her when I can....so lots of mixed messages from her. I agreed because I thought she would let me pay her when I had money from paychecks..not from savings.
And I'm already in the hole with my savings due to other emergencies because my pay unexpectedly decreased a couple months ago. I would have drawn out of my savings if it wasn't for that and not only that, my savings is for my rent (I'm a student). and honestly..what if I didn't have savings?? then what?
ok, here's the rest of my advice.
don't borrow any more money! Ever. If you cannot get a handle on your fiscal responsibilities now, then please stop.
You can always replace the money in your savings. I am not sure where your hang up is with regards to this. Her mixed messages don't matter one iota. You owe her money. Period. Please try and stop focusing on her life. None of that matters in this scenario.
If you are a "poor college kid" you don't need to spend that much on a ticket to a concert.
and yet...they still have no concept of the value of money.
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