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Old 06-20-2012, 07:44 PM
 
654 posts, read 894,442 times
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Default Why do some people make friends easier than others?

This is something I have wondered about. I mean, if people relocate to a new area, why do some people seem to instantly make friends while others, no matter how outgoing and nice they are, seem to struggle with it?
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Old 06-20-2012, 09:45 PM
 
Location: Guangzhou, China
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kemba View Post
This is something I have wondered about. I mean, if people relocate to a new area, why do some people seem to instantly make friends while others, no matter how outgoing and nice they are, seem to struggle with it?
Personality, how people were raised, how often they moved as a kid, etc.

Although I'm actually somewhat reserved socially, I generally don't have a problem meeting new people wherever I move, due in part to the fact (imho) that I was a military kid and bounced around a lot.

Where specifically you move or are trying to meet people does make a difference, though. For instance, in LA, SF, Boston, NYC, Vegas, Portland, and various rural locales, etc etc etc I've never had a problem making friends. However, I found it somewhat difficult in Seattle (which was the main reason I moved away).
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Old 06-20-2012, 09:51 PM
 
Location: Pa
31,829 posts, read 17,059,411 times
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You have the gift of gab. Know how to communicate.
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Old 06-20-2012, 10:23 PM
 
284 posts, read 240,806 times
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I think those who make friends easily tend to be better listeners.

People usually like to share about themselves, so they probably find it easier to turn to those who are willing and patient enough to listen to them and also able to empathise with them.

On the other hand, the more outgoing and extroverted people might not be good listeners as they tend to talk more than they listen.
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Old 06-21-2012, 10:04 AM
 
Location: San Francisco
453 posts, read 324,981 times
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Number one thing is being a good listener. Make the conversation partner feel important. The number two thing is to have an open-minded laid back attitude.
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Old 06-21-2012, 10:28 AM
 
Location: New Jersey
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because people don't like others if they're too weird for them, doesn't matter how nice you are to them, they finds reasons to ostracize you. people are mostly no good anyways.
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Old 06-21-2012, 10:39 AM
 
Location: Where the sun always shines..
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Honestly, here it goes: I am a moderately social person, pretty comparable to the average 30 something mother. I have always had a hard time meeting, and making friends all through my adult life. I have had a close few, and even fewer who have remained true friends. I have always tried to be Ms Social butterfly and surround myself with people I care about and vice versa.

I have grown to realize in my adult life, that I don't have many friends because I dont need them. Sure, I have a few, but that's all I need. I suppose there isnt a lot of necessity that drives me to make friends constantly. I'm happy, I have a large amazing family that I'm close with. The world is full of catty, jealous, shady, materialistic people, and I'm just not like them. Good people aren't easy to find, so I suppose this is why good friends are hard to find too..
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Old 06-21-2012, 07:01 PM
 
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People approach me and that's the only reason I know as many people as I do. I'm shy, so it wouldn't happen any other way. I just go with it.
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Old 06-21-2012, 07:11 PM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
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Maybe people are pretty selective as to who they want to spend time with. This world judges you so much on appearances.
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Old 06-22-2012, 02:44 PM
 
Location: Northern New Jersey
49 posts, read 56,970 times
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It's because of "POPULARITY". It's always been about Popularity. Some people just draw others to them. They are POPULAR. Their personalities, their looks, it all draws people to them. They're Pretty. People are drawn to Pretty.
Listen to the song "Popular" from the Broadway musical "Wicked". You'll understand, it really is about Popularity!
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