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Old 10-09-2012, 05:15 AM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,683 posts, read 45,213,956 times
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While he has his good points, I find it can be stressful being around my dad because he gets easily annoyed at things, is quick to anger, argue, or scold. He's often critical and negative about things but sometimes can't see it. Sometimes he claims it's because he cares too much or something. I guess it's partly genetic. My sister is too and sometimes has the same righteous attitude. My mum less so but still there, and she can be too serious too. All of them just seem serious, unhappy and grumpy all the time, not light-hearted like others I know.

I've worked with and interacted with people who are like this too. They just seem quick to get into a tiff, or always have a look on their faces like they're going to bite your head off. There are also those who take EVERYTHING personally and easily take offence. Annoyingly, I think I've inherited a bit of that from my parents and also through my upbringing. I now realise how negative the environment was and how that's affected me. I think my parents tried their best, in their own way with their limitations, and I wasn't perfect either, but I've noticed myself getting a bit irritable too, but nowhere near how some people are.

Are most of these people deeply unhappy inside? Even if they deny it, it just doesn't seem they're happy, I think it's more than personality. I know people who are deeply caring who aren't like this at all: they are positive, don't bring people down, and offer constructive advice.

Are you often frustrated by this behaviour?
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Old 10-09-2012, 06:17 AM
 
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I don't really have people like that in my life anymore (my friends are awesome, I don't talk to the crazy family members, and I work from home - thus avoiding persnickety co-workers). Life's too short to cater to someone's fragile sense of self or skitter around the edges of their trigger points. I'm sorry it's your family

But if your own tendencies towards this worry you, I'd take up meditation. Trust me - it helps!
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Old 10-09-2012, 08:34 AM
 
6,418 posts, read 9,925,193 times
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Yes but I also get frustrated at passive aggressive people (like some aforementioned individuals on this forum) who act like innocent little victims that the world is against but really are wolves in sheep's clothing. They are just as bad if not worse than quick tempered folks.
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Old 10-09-2012, 08:39 AM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,683 posts, read 45,213,956 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by allenk893 View Post
Yes but I also get frustrated at passive aggressive people (like some aforementioned individuals on this forum) who act like innocent little victims that the world is against but really are wolves in sheep's clothing. They are just as bad if not worse than quick tempered folks.
Oh yeah I know the type. Especially the ones you say 'geez, can't you take a joke?' and then act like you've said something bad about your mother when you say anything about them.
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Old 10-09-2012, 09:56 AM
 
Location: Planet Earth, USA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by allenk893 View Post
Yes but I also get frustrated at passive aggressive people (like some aforementioned individuals on this forum) who act like innocent little victims that the world is against but really are wolves in sheep's clothing. They are just as bad if not worse than quick tempered folks.
I can't stand people who pretend to be your friends but really don't like you and make passive aggressive comments to "cut you down" because they feel inferior.

They will leech off of you and continually make subtle comments. If you call them out, they will act SUPRISED and SHOCKED that you would ever think such a thing!
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Old 10-09-2012, 11:51 AM
 
Location: DFW
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I'm the opposite.. I think I can literally break world records with respect to how much anger, shouting, yelling I can take before I snap. Physical violence against me is another story but a lot of times, I tune out anger easily and could care less.

I've dealt with this from both family and work and nowadays, I just wait there until they tire out their voice boxes..

People have told me I'm arrogant simply because of this trait and I think it's true.. but it's the arrogance that fuels this resilience. Anger and shouting directed towards me only adds to the "Fire" that's my own ego and arrogance.

As for how prone I am personally to bursting into anger, I'd say I'm probably a little less likely than average.
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Old 10-09-2012, 01:20 PM
 
Location: Brooklyn,NY
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I am fortunate my friends, GF, Family members and co-workers are level headed, patient and usually think about how to handle a situation before speaking. It really is true how keeping a level head and staying in control makes a difference. I practice this to the best of my abilities. You ever been in a situation and thought about saying something that might have been out of line, But did not and resolved things constructively? And was glad you kept things level? That's a good feeling.
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Old 10-09-2012, 01:30 PM
 
Location: New York, NY
1,630 posts, read 2,361,131 times
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I have escorted everyone like that out of my life. I felt bad at first but my spirits have soared since. I like tell-it-like-it-is people but carping negative people have to go. I felt bad for their misery but my presence won't help or harm the situation. I'd just get dragged down with them.
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Old 10-11-2012, 08:23 AM
 
Location: New Albany, IN
832 posts, read 1,373,565 times
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Default Just two or three people in particular

There are many kinds of the easily offended, quick-to-anger folks. Thankfully the majority of people I know aren't like that but the few that are, ufff...almost unbearable. For example if you're walking in close quarters, like down a hallway or in a crowd, and you brush shoulders or bump into one of these people they give an unquestionable "I'm gonna bite your head off" look. I want to say to them, "oh yeah, I brushed your shoulder because it was your shoulder, I wouldn't have done that to anyone else!" I can't stand the people who react like that to even one possibility of a hint of disrespect. I admit that as a kid I was a lot more sensitive but as a grown person living in the "real world" you should have learned by now. The other funny thing about those people is that you may think that if they care so much about their feelings, they would care just as much about others' feelings--not a chance. If they care about others' feelings, there has to be something in it for them too.
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Old 10-11-2012, 09:21 AM
 
Location: Connecticut is my adopted home.
2,276 posts, read 3,067,502 times
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%^*# IT. NOT THIS TOPIC AGAIN!!!!!! IF I TOLD YOU ONCE, I TOLD YOU A THOUSAND TIMES......

I once worked with a guy that literally blew up and shouted over teeny tiny minor things and like a big gust of wind it would be over with in a few minutes and he'd be fine until the next thing ticked him off but he held no grudges. Every day was a new day. At first I didn't know how to take him because I'm his polar opposite. It takes a lot to make me angry and I don't get angry very often but when I do it takes a lot for me to get past it with the person that pushed me over the edge. For my coworker, I learned to tune out his outbursts because he meant nothing by them and he didn't make things personal.

It would be nice if people had the slow to anger but quick to forgive profile but that's a rare bird indeed.

OP, FWIW I grew up in an environment like yours. All I can tell you is to try not to let their personal misery get you down and try not to take it personally because their anger and irritation says more about them than the objects of their scorn. Easier said than done I assure you. And yes, some people are simply unhappy and have no other apparent mission in life than to spread it around. Avoid spending too much time with these type of people if at all possible. Good luck.
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